How often does your daughter contact you at uni?

[likearollingstone1]

My daughter leaves for uni this year, a good few hours away?, and just wondered how often you guys hear from your kids? She says she won't want to contact much. I'm dreading it!

My DS never contacted us off his own back. We’d only get a reply to a text days later.

hardly ever! We have the family group chat that my daughters (2 at university) still participate in - photos of the dogs always help. I visit each of them once a term (and the other daughter joins me - they're both at northern universities). I did set up a weekly call which worked for a while.

They come home at the holidays too, so it doesn't work out that I go too long without seeing them, maybe 4 weeks max.

And of course they contact me when they need something!

DD is in her second year about four hours away, comes home for Easter/summer/xmas.

Since she first went away our contact had pretty much stayed the same - I didn't think she'd contact us as much as she does but we still text a couple of times a day (for example today we briefly texted about the new coffee machine we bought her for Xmas and she sent a video of the first drink she made with it) so just random quick stuff. She also constantly sends me cat videos from TikTok lol.

She video calls us roughly every other day for a longer chat and to catch up with what she's up to and what's happening at home. X

Initially DS phoned most Sundays while he was hanging out his washing. Now it's about every fortnight. DD usually rings me at some point during the week.

We've never put pressure on. We took a here when you need us or fancy a chat approach.

We called ds every week regardless of wether he contacted us or not. We had a lot of contact the first year but after that not much.

We’ve been doing a family zoom call (dc in first year of uni), and we try and do it weekly. It’s really nice actually, and we probably talk more in the zoom than we would when they were at home!

They rarely contact unless they need something 😂
they’ll put a thumbs up or a brief comment on family chat things, and I text them usually once a fortnight.
my DD will respond that day, DS2 in a few days, DS1 may or may not respond ever.
i don’t mind, it’s good that they’re busy!

A few texts every other day or so but really random stuff - like a photo of something nice she’d had for dinner, or a quip about love island or asking me if she can eat mince that’s 3 days old.. that sort of stuff. Nothing actually informative or personal. It’s weird. She always says we’re very close and she loves her family but she never really shares anything. She’s in year 3 now.

Maybe a couple of times a week? Last term she came home for a weekend, and this term we're visiting (5hrs away). Depends on how she's getting on, she tends to contact more when having a wobble.

DS calls once or twice a week, messages every day, and comes home about every 3-4 weeks (he's only 50 miles away and transport is free).

I still feel like I know what's going on in his life (although I'm sure there are some things he doesn't share with me).

Mine does quite a lot tbh. About 4 times a week. I’m trying to not crowd her but she just likes to chat i think. She’s very happy so it’s not that.

I think lack of contact is probably a good thing - it means they're getting on with their life. I think you count yourself lucky if that's how it works out.

This is what I tell myself. It’s sad when I don’t hear much but then I would rather that then her be struggling and phoning or texting me in distress - which I’m sure she would if she was unhappy.

For the first year or so of uni it was daily contact, just a quick text or something.

At certain times with DD1 , when she was on a placement abroad and having MH problems,it was a 30 minute phone call every night . That was actually quite draining.

Now if we haven't had a sign of life in about 48 hours we contact them. But a sign of life can just be a like on a family group chat. Sometimes we phone them for a chat, sometimes we text with a request for a sign of life. It doesn't happen often.

I phoned home 2-3 times a week. My brother has to be called.

DS called us everyday.

From your title, I thought you were the one away at uni @likearollingstone1 😆

DD's in yr3 now.

In year 1 term 1 it was super regular, often several times a day. Questions about things or checking things out. Diminished a lot since then.
Now a LOT in short bursts, usually about a specific thing/situation/person and lots of not hearing from her for ages.
If I miss her, I'll post a pic of the dog
Then she'll always reply

Ds1 is in his final year. Weekly zoom call with all of us, Dh, me and Ds2, same time, same day. Plus contact throughout the week maybe every other day or daily. This varies with who he is contacting, could be gaming with Ds2 or me about books he reads or Dh about his course.

Ds1 thinks it is extremely rude and selfish to happily take your parents' money to support you at uni and not contact them.

We FaceTime DS1 (fresher) about twice a week. He sends messages maybe every other day.

A couple of times a day, but we've always had that kind of "chatty" thing going on.
She's at university abroad, so only comes home at Christmas and Easter. In her second year now.

Me too ‘RockyRogue1001 and was a bit jealous for a minute!

Every day but she's really not been happy there. I would live it to be only once a week as that would mean She's happy and settled. She's home alot too.
Try and be positive that a low amount if cobtact means she's happy and making the break from home well.

*love

My dd year 2 calls daily and send messages throughout the day.
She is in UK, we are in Ireland, going to visit next weekend.

In the first year, daily. At least 1 phone call and at least 5 texts. She has MH issues and being away at uni was a real adjustment for her.

She's in her final year now and is much more settled. She phones maybe once every 10 days and texts every other day on average.

She comes home around once a month.