Piercings at school

[Suzysheep23]

Does anyone know why staff and sixth formers would have more relaxed rules on piercings etc than students in years 7-11? They’re in the same environment doing the same tasks and lessons, still representing the school, so what’s the difference please? (I know they are to be removed for PE due to health and Safety.) In addition to this is your right to self expression and equality only limited to the categories LGBTQ? Can you not just identify as a person who has piercings?? (Amongst many others - although why we must be categorised is another debate!) Are we not trying to eradicate discrimination and judging in this day and age? So far the only reply to this is “rules are rules” which isn’t really answering my question.

my point is it doesn’t stop her learning, the staff teach with them, you can identify under 5 letters (LGBTQ )but not anything else and not everyone is getting punished for their wearing of them. It’s the hypocrisy, unfairness and discrimination that I’m frustrated with. If everyone is telling me to focus on her education as that’s what’s important, then why shouldn’t the school? Works both ways 🤷🏼‍♀️

How does that make me a teen? Those are three valid questions that no one has actually managed to answer!
all Ive been told is “rules are rules” which is a cop out to say the least!

of course it's a big deal to her. She's a teenager.

One of the jobs we have as parents is to try to model to our children what sort of things really are big deals, worth fighting for, and what aren't. This is the latter.

Get her interested in feminism, or climate change, or the state of the NHS, of something that's it's worth expending mental energy on.

if she feels strongly about it then it is worth fighting for! Just because it’s trivia to you doesn’t mean it’s not valid! This is exactly my point!

I thank you all for your time, comments and opinions. The tone and name calling for some needs working on and I hope you think about that for future posts. All the very best.

Sixth formers have always had more freedom. When I was at school, when you were in sixth form you could wear normal clothes, park in the staff car park, could come and go for lunch and you were allowed to call teachers by their Christian names. It’s nothing to do with attending the same lessons as younger students but more acknowledging the older pupils were more responsible and had more freedom. I agree with their policy on piercings.

Oh I love a school rule rebellion! Fighting the small stuff often means less writing 'Mrs Smith is a fat twat' over the toilet walls or punching another pupil in the face because darling Daisy is too preoccupied with hiding her new 'rebellious' piercing under her hair

Putting hair over it is not what they meant and you know that, they mean on parts of the body can't be seen

This 'well my child need to express themselves' is ridiculous, there are rules to be followed same as people in jobs do

That is life

if she feels strongly about it then it is worth fighting for!

Well no, obviously that is not the case. But if you as her parent are encouraging that rather immature viewpoint then it's not surprising she has the attitude she has.

Why don't you understand the difference between children and adults?

This is a completely different issue. If you feel like she is being unfairly punished and the standards aren't consistent then you need to raise that with the school.

if she feels strongly about it then it is worth fighting for!

Well, maybe in your house...but maybe not in the grand scheme of things. And if you really feel this strongly about it then you could always look for alternative schooling where she can fully express herself in all the ways she feels strongly about

Yes, rules are rules, and if you don't agree with them, challenge them in an age-appropriate way. Assuming your DD is at secondary school, there will be avenues available via Student Council or whatever it is called in her school.
What she and you can't do is make a one-person stand against the rules as they are, complaining that you have been targeted - the rules are the rules, and if your dd is breaking them, she will have to take the consequences.
You would be far better off spending your energy encouraging her to either conform, or raise a concern about the rules in an appropriate way.

The schools can set rules at any time for the students. As a parent you can agree and send your child or not and find an alternative.

Piercings are not equivalent to someone's sexuality and to align them is simply wrong.Noone has been jailed for piercings however being gay was a crime up to recent times. And in some countries is still punishable by death.

You knew the rules or had access to them, follow or find an alternative education provision. You are doing your child no favours by making this an issue, as it is sending a clear issue you are not supporting the school.

It isn't discrimination, the rule is applied to your child's peers. You got it wrong apologise, remove the piercing and let your child get on with her job- learning.

There are only so many hours / minutes in a day. We can either spend it sorting out infected piercings / looking for lost jewellery etc x 100s of students, or we can spend that time teaching your children and preparing them for the exams, the results of which which they will need to secure the jobs they want to do in the future. Your call, but as a parent also, I know which I'd prefer.

My daughter is a teacher. She is expected to follow the dress code for sixth formers.

When I was at school (1970s), the rationale for having no uniform for the sixth form was that students didn't have to be there so they were allowed more freedom in order to encourage them to stay.

In those days, the vast majority of students at my school left at 16 and either found jobs or went to the local FE college to do vocational courses. Only a small minority of us stayed on to do A levels at school.

Students who left for FE college had no uniform and it was felt that those who stayed at school should be treated in the same way.

DD just started at the Grammar school I went to around 15 years ago. They now don’t allow ear piercings or any jewellery whatsoever for years 7-11. Although staff and sixth formers are not required to adhere to the same rule. DD has her lobes pierced and I've had to say that she has to stick to the rules, she is not happy. However, she's had them for over a year and she can remove them in the morning and put them back in on the way home with no issues.
By year 9 my ears were pierced from top to bottom. By sixth form I had multiple facial piercings.
I took her to and from school last week as an adjustment period. We were late one day and the receptionist asked me if I was "one of our new sixth formers".
I’m 5ft nothing with a baby face full of metal, and still a "goth" (sorry mum, it wasn’t a phase).
I’m also 34...
I've told DD that I’m in no position to argue with staff about lobe piercings when I look the way I do 🙈 rules are rules, even if they don’t apply to everyone.

I think my point is, I was able to take my appearance to the extreme and was lucky enough to get away with most of it when younger. Even now being older but looking younger.
However, I understand that it's not a look that most will be able to carry off in a professional role. School rules are an important part of that. There's plenty of time to express yourself and plenty of free space to do so in your own time. Even around here where we're plagued by gangs of scallies ready to jump "that fuckin' goff", you learn how to do things in the best way for yourself.
I guess I want her to not necessarily "do better", but learn the boundaries between what you can achieve by ticking some boxes that you've worked very hard for and also be your own person alongside. You can do both. It's just hard to guide a teen through it.

Some schools do not have uniforms and different policies.
As a parent you have the right to move your child to a different school, or you could home school and then it is up to you what she does, what she wears etc.
There are other options if do not like the rules.

MY DD has double lobe piercings but rarely wears any earrings to school as they have to come out for PE. It's quite easy. She is allowed one pair and her school oddly don't seem fussed whether she wears the lower or higher pair.
She wants a helix piercing - after discussing it we agreed there was no point until the end of year 11.
I don't necessarily agree with the rules myself but the school aren't going to change them. It's easier not to waste energy on a pointless battle.