DD 13yo wants theatre career... we want to suggest something in between?

[WhatNoWay]

Hi all, DD2 is asking for an audition for a 'professional show' as a Xmas present. She is mad about theatre, film, musical theatre in particular, does a lot of dance at school and plays music and goes to an after school drama club and keeps talking about an 'acting career' (seems dead serious). We are not keen on her going down that route but don't want her to drop it either - this is something she enjoys a lot and has fun doing. She has a good voice, lots of encouragement (and invites to perform at school concerts) from school music teacher, has stage presence and gets very good feedback from her drama/dance teachers. I think she has potential (but not sure how much exactly!) I've looked at BYMT and NYMT and if she does get selected for a show - 'living and breathing theatre for 2-3 weeks' is not our (and her) cup of tea... I don't want her to skip school (she's in Y8 and doing ok academically but only due to good memory - puts next to zero effort into studying although was v good as a young girl). Anyway, the question is, where do i get her a kind of an audition that is definitely not a huge commitment? not a west end show but something in between her local drama school and the high end? Any recommendations overall?? We are not keen on her choosing theatre as main career path (as in putting all eggs in the same basket way). She has mood swings, is a very emotional and anxious child prone to depression (in fact has depression signs - went through a course of therapy sessions but needs more) and thrives on stability and routine rather than late nights and disruptions and poor diet... Would greatly appreciate advice!!

Several people have mentioned panto auditions at local theatres, but you will have missed the boat this year, their auditions will have been and gone weeks ago. She would also need a lot more dance training to get through those auditions, the competition is stiff.

Is she interested in drama, or musical theatre?

Sorry! I thought you’d said (twice) that you aren’t keen on her going down the route of a theatre career, and you were looking for something lower-commitment you can offer her to distract her from her desire to do a professional audition. The definition of discouraging something.

I must have totally misread.

And at 13 probably too old/tall for panto.

Don't make it her Christmas present. You can't gift an audition. However you should definitely encourage her.
There must be some youth theatres, drama schools that are local to you. Sign her up to one of those. If she has potential they will organise the auditions. If not it really doesn't matter she will be doing something she loves and drama training is always helpful giving a young person confidence and ability to talk in front of an audience is good training for any job.
There is more to life than academia.
I know several people who have taken drama/theatre degrees some work in the industry now, some don't but they all have professional jobs and they were able to study a subject they loved

Let her experience it for herself, with you there to support her.

It might put her off, or it might help her to learn to deal with constructive criticism.

Listen to your DDs dreams and believe in her. She isn't you.

My nephew is in a popular West End show, won't say which one as its outing but he's 11. Maybe he'll still be in Theatre when he grows up maybe he won't be who knows, but for now he's happy. Yes it can be tiring but he's fine, gets time off, still gets an education etc. Its actually been good in terms of concentration and discipline

You sound as if you assume your DD will be unable to manage her chosen path and will be a no-resilience failure. Do you not have faith in her/are you unprepared to encourage her?

Why cant she have audition as Christmas present if she wants to, why the need for this level of control?

As for asking on MN you mostly get replies from people that only see striving to be a 9-5er for life as an option and nothing else. Fine if thats ok for you and they but that doesn't mean it will be ok for your DD. Or, maybe in the end it will be but for now if this is her passion just let her go for it.

They do take teenagers so age wouldn't be an issue, but they need to be shorter than the adult main cast. And fit into their stock of costumes.

The main problem I can foresee is that the OP's dd doesn't do anywhere near enough dance classes to stand any chance in a panto audition.

I think if living and breathing theatre for a few weeks wouldn’t be her cup of tea then a career in professional acting isn’t going to suit, is it?

If it was my daughter I would be sitting her down to talk about her career options in theatre. Look at some professional actors with her and point out to her that the majority of theatre actors are well educated, well spoken etc. Point out the requirements for good drama schools, that they will require good grades outside of drama. How will she learn lines upon lines of Shakespeare to portray Portia when she can’t be bothered studying her English homework and says it’s ‘boring.’ What does she imagine life as an actress is? It’s days and days of studying scripts, and comprehending them, then analysing them to put your own interpretation on them.

"(I was in theatre management for 8 years many many years ago)"

That doesn't make you the knowledge on it. Your experience will be different to the next persons. Stop trying to talk her out of it and let her give it a go!

Have not RTFT. Also, I'm someone with no professional experience, but lots of involvement in youth and adult amateur productions, and I have friends who've gone on to professional performing. I'd suggest she joins a youth theatre, and also looks into the national youth theatre summer schools.

I'd suggest agreeing that she can join a local Am Dram group now. If she shows commitment to it for a year without letting school or other commitments slip then if she still wants to you will support her with professional auditions.

Look at a few groups together and consider where they perform, what type of productions they do (panto, musicals, Shakespeare, operatic etc) and whether they are all ages, youth based or have a minimum age.

Oh don't apologise, it turned into a long thread :) I meant we allowed her all the opportunities available as she was always keen but not willing to go down registering with an agency route and do auditions etc etc. She is already involved in all school productions and her local drama school shows (lead roles etc) but now somehow sees that as a career for life. I know she's only 13 but she keeps on about it and I decided I need to do something but not expose her to west end opportunities etc.

@ethelredonagoodday Actually, yes, done NT summer school and Unicorn too. That's probably how her interest was first piqued - great atmosphere, amazing staff, big stage, international community. Done Trinity music summer school too. Bet she thinks the theatre career is like those summer schools!

All good points, @Kanaloa , thanks!!

Thanks @LIZS . Good point. Not v near London but within 1.5hr train.

Thanks @FleasNavidad ! Good to see both sides.

I shouldn't worry. I can't think of a single West End opportunity for a 13 year old in a good many years unless she is absolutely tiny.

For most London professional roles they prefer those within an hour of the theatre or organise part-time boarding so that may restrict her. I know likes of GSA do weekend youth classes. Jo Hawes courses were based in Marlow.

Don't know where you are in the country, but if there is a theatre school near you (Stagecoach or Pauline Quirke or similar), then maybe you could pay for a term of classes as a Christmas present. It all depends on whether she just wants to do drama, or singing and dance shows as well. Most theatres have a youth theatre group as I think someone already mentioned, so maybe look into that option.

Side point but have you ever considered that she might have adhd? Some of your description lines up with adhd symptoms.

I would think that if it down time, she is just scrolling the internet then you may as well encourage more theatre. It's unlike to impact the amount of homework she does imo.

The routine and discipline that rehearsals give are amazingly good for kids. I was similar as a kid (anxious, depressed, hated myself, couldn't deal with criticism etc.) - theatre was my release as I was good at it, could embody other characters and I made most of my friends that way. Yes sometimes it's late nights but it's good hard work and fun - it doesn't give you room to have wandering thoughts as you have to be on it and ready. I so recommend it. A lot of theatre teachers have gone down similar paths and will understand.

Looking back, I was obviously depressed as a teenager.

School was relentless and overwhelming with expectations that I would do well and go to university etc. In the end, I got some mediocre results which didn't reflect my abilities. Not to mention all the after school stuff. It felt like I was on a hamster wheel and never had any time just to "be" and just muck about and chill.

I feel like I can really sympathise with OP's DD. Some kids thrive on it, but many don't.

I did several "proper" jobs, all of which left me feeling like I did at school but with the added pressure of being an adult and having to earn money.

I am now a professional musician. No routine, lots of late nights, travelling, haphazard income etc etc.

Never been happier ☺

One of my DC is a professional dancer, so it is different to acting but it has similarities. You do need to be focused and thick-skinned, as training is tough, cut-throat and ruthless. Auditioning for jobs is even harder. She has a few friends from school - normal comprehensive - who performed in West End Shows. They tended to be in year 7. Another worked in primary school and secondary school on a couple of TV shows - she was identified through an out-of-school drama group. I think it’s OK to encourage her at this age. 13 is an awkward age for appearing in shows, though. I think working at her drama groups is important, as well as hard work at school -understanding literature, history etc is all important for drama. My nephew was also identified through an out-of-school drama club and appeared on stage (not London, not panting) a few times and was put forward for a couple of films (didn’t get them). Ordinary school, not a wealthy family, regional accent, etc. He didn’t go into the performing arts professionally but enjoyed it during primary and secondary school.

• panto, not panting.

Did consider this and flagged it up many a time with doctors, teachers. Was recommended therapy which we did.