Tell me about your teenager after school routine

[Iwanttoslowdown]

I usually try and make myself available between 3-3.30pm for the after school teens returning. And then I don’t usually see them until dinner - and all eating at different times too. How and when do you carve out time for your teens - thinking I might need to rethink this routine so looking for inspo.

We always eat together between 7 and 8. Might watch some tv together. Bed at 10:30 on school nights. Weekends maybe later depending on what we are doing

I consider it a success if 14yo comes to chat with me a couple of times a week. He gets home around 3pm most days and will usually pop in and say hi, chat for about 5 mins and then disappear. He is meant to do his jobs (empty dishwasher and check if bins need to go down/take them down) by 5 at the latest which I usually end up reminding him at 4:30. From about 4 I make dinner for the little ones (1 and 4) if it's something 14yo likes too I'll ask if he also wants some. However he does disappear with it into bedroom. Sometimes he comes in absolutely starving and makes something then.

We won't then see him until his internet cuts off at 8:30 at which point he may traipse in and start asking questions about something random. I remind him to have a shower and he mysteriously vanishes

But no, I think 3-3:30 is fine? If you're checking in with them daily then that's great. I tend to mark out that time (3-4) as the time that I need to bring up any issues if there's anything I want to urgently ask/discuss with/tell him.

Mine alway seem to be with mate's after school until at least 6ish. Later in the summer.
Dd is autistic with misophonia so we are privileged if she eats with us.

When I'm at home and on day off, they come home throw their shoes and bags in the hall. Have a quick chat to me about their day, then straight to the kitchen on the hunt for food and drinks. They then go upstairs until I shout tea is ready we eat at the table and have a catch up before everyone retires to their rooms again. If I'm in work the roles are reversed as they usually cook tea.

DS 14, gets in from school at 2.40pm. Eats lunch. Studies/ does homework and is usually out the door at 3.30 to see friends, play football, swim, etc until I call him for dinner. Then back out until 9.30, later on a Friday. He comes back and showers, does any revision if exams the next day and then goes to bed at 11.

13 year old here, he generally either stays at school doing football club or plays football on the Astro with friends, takes a slow walk home with friends and stop off at each other's houses. Generally back for dinner by 5:30 at the moment (we eat as a family at 6) in the summer he had to be home by 7 so I'd save dinner if he was still out. He'll then game and then do homework at about 8 when his younger siblings all are in bed, this is generally our chatting catch up time he'll hang downstairs with me for a bit.

Dd17 gets home and if I'm not working that day has a snack and drink then tells me about her day/ chats for up to an hour depending on the day's events then does homework and goes in the gym / part time job /school work until we all eat together at 7/7.30 pm then she helps clear up and vanishes to her room / watches something with us .

Ds is in sixth form so has free periods but prefers to be home to do his work here but when he was in school, he would come home and tell me what he had studied in each period. He gets changed, gets a snack and a drink. Has a brief chill before starting homework. Then gaming or Reddit, also YouTube which can be watching other people game or a mad range of anything and everything from how Qatar persuaded people to vote for them for the world cup, why Cyrpus has such a large no mans land, history of anything, politics, world news.

Dinner is a family get together, Ds helps prep dinner and if he doesn't need to prep as in it is cooking in the slow cooker then he is in the kitchen chatting about the above things he has learned. We also listen to music or podcasts. We all have dinner together. We watch some TV together as a family and then he goes off to do his own thing and Dh and I chat and watch some stuff together. This is the same when Ds1 is home from uni too, ie family dinner, the two of them making dinner together for everyone.

Also everyone clears down after dinner, no one sits until the kitchen is clean, dishwasher packed, worktops wiped down.