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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

DD12 insecure of her legs

29 replies

thecuriouscat · 15/08/2022 09:45

Hi all,
Im not really sure what to do at the moment. My DD has expressed her concerns over wanted to shave her legs and I just don’t feel comfortable giving her a razor and telling her to get on with it. I only started when I was 15 and we both have dark, thick hair so it does get noticeable on our skin. I do feel for her but I can’t help but wonder if maybe someone from school is saying stuff to her. What are your thoughts, should I let her?

OP posts:
basilmint · 15/08/2022 09:47

Let her do it if she wants to. My Mum wouldn't let me and people at school made unkind comments so I just started doing it without telling her. You could get her an electric shaver if you are worried about razors.

cathyandclare · 15/08/2022 09:47

I would let her, or pay for waxing or buy Veet and show her how to use it. Why wait until 15 if she’s got thick dark hair and she’s self-conscious now?

theresaratinthekitchen · 15/08/2022 09:48

We were all shaving our legs in Year 7 (25 years ago). Please let her.

FlorettaB · 15/08/2022 09:50

Year 7 is totally normal. Just because you waited why should she suffer?

Beamur · 15/08/2022 09:51

Show her how to do it safely and let her.
She's not too young if it's bothering her.

Valhalla17 · 15/08/2022 09:51

She's 15, of course she wants to shave her legs. It's very normal! I was doing it at age 12 because I was also incredibly hairy with dark hair and I was embarrassed in my school skirt. Give her a razor or cream or take her for a wax

Valhalla17 · 15/08/2022 09:52

My mum showed me how to sort mine out, so do the same

LadyDanburysHat · 15/08/2022 09:52

Why don't you want to let her. It's perfectly normal once secondary school hits to want to do it. I was also a hairy child whose Mum wouldn't allow me to shave my legs, it made me miserable.

Yes it would be great if women didn't have these beauty standards thrown at them, but the reality is that we do.

Macaroni46 · 15/08/2022 09:52

I'd ask her if she'd like them waxed? That way she starts the process of thinning the hair rather doing the opposite with shaving. That's what I did with my DDs. Please don't make her wait? What's the point?

Mortonpup · 15/08/2022 09:52

I'd let her go for a wax

mattressspring · 15/08/2022 09:57

What is making you uncomfortable?

InquiringMinds · 15/08/2022 10:00

@thecuriouscat please rather take her to get them waxed. It will stop the regrowth being as bad and it will also prevent ingrown hairs. I wish my Mum had given me this advice when I was 12. Don’t go by your own experience. School kids can be cruel, please do this for her. Hair remover cream does not have the same affect! Waxing is not expensive.

Mariposista · 15/08/2022 10:05

Wax or depilatory cream - don't use razors. It grows back prickly and horrible and there is a higher risk of cutting herself.

Original poster
thecuriouscat · 15/08/2022 10:07

I asked her and she said she prefers shaving over waxing because all of her friends do it and it would hurt less. Thanks for all of the responses ladies. I’m hesitating because I only let my oldest daughter use hair removal cream when she was 15 as well, and my youngest, 12 seems more uncomfortable/insecure about her body hair. I don’t want to make her miserable that’s the least I want to do as a mother, so I think i’ll show her how to shave properly and just let her. There’s no winning with my youngest anyways 🤦‍♀️

OP posts:
Suzi888 · 15/08/2022 10:11

I’d let her too.

FlorettaB · 15/08/2022 10:13

’I’m hesitating because I only let my oldest daughter use hair removal cream when she was 15 as well’

Genuinely, why? Why did you pick 15 as the age?

Emmelina · 15/08/2022 10:23

Take her to get some nice shaving gel and razors, tell her how to do it right and leave her to it. Remember to teach her about rinsing the razor thoroughly afterward letting it dry out properly, and that she’ll need to use a new razor or change the head every now and then or she’ll start nicking herself as it blunts.
then you leave her to it.

shazzybazzy34 · 15/08/2022 10:29

Yes I would absolutely let her do it, show her how to do it properly first but it is is making her self conscious, let her do it.

MustBeThursday · 15/08/2022 11:03

Please let her. My DM was very resistant to me starting shaving my legs "because once you start you never stop" and "it will grow back thicker" (I am much darker haired than her) and I was mocked dreadfully about it. Get an electric shaver if you're concerned about razors, or those pads that you rub over your legs a bit like smoother sandpaper.

UncomfortableSilence · 15/08/2022 12:29

Absolutely let her, I was that dark body haired kid growing up and my Mum took me for waxing as soon as I asked.

DD1 is lucky in that she has hardly any body hair but DD12 takes after me. She asked to shave just before going into Y7, she uses the shaving head that came with my epilator so no worries about cuts etc maybe look at an electric shaver first, it's not quite a a close a shave but a good start.

waterrat · 15/08/2022 19:50

God please let her. What is the reason for making a 13 or 14 year old go around with hairy legs. Yea in an ideal world nobody would comment or notice but I am 44 and still vividly remember older girls in primary...so I was under 10...mocking my hairy legs.

We live in a culture where dark hair on legs is not considered pleasant. I don't see why a 12 year old shouldn't be able to get rid of their hair just like an older teen.

RenegadeMatron · 15/08/2022 19:55

15 is really, really late.

I started shaving my legs at 11, and this was back in the dim and distant 80s.

You have the very late age of 15 in your head because that’s when you started doing it, but it’s a completely arbitrary and meaningless age.

Let her crack on.

sunniest · 15/08/2022 20:02

I started shaving my legs around that age but was only allowed to use an electric shaver to start with (remember the Philips Ladyshave?) as there was less risk of me cutting myself.

YukoandHiro · 15/08/2022 20:04

I started in year 8 at about 12/13. People started teasing me so I just got on with it. Either let her or (better) pay for waxing

clipclop5 · 16/08/2022 14:36

Please let her, or if you don’t feel comfortable with her having a razor yet then buy her some hair removal cream.