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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

DS 17 got arrested last night

91 replies

SareWall · 17/07/2022 15:29

DS 17 was riding around on his motorcycle last night with a friend on the back. They had smoked some weed. A police car was behind them and the friend put his hands over the number plate and he tried to out run the police car.

They eventually got hemmed in and stopped. The friend ran away and my son was arrested and spent the night in the cells. He has been drug tested which will come back positive, he has been told he will face a driving ban for 3 years. He has also been told if he tests positive for drugs (he knows he will), he may go to prison for a year.

I’ve cut my holiday short to come home but I just don’t know how to respond to this. Is there anyone else who has been in a similar situation?

OP posts:
THisbackwithavengeance · 17/07/2022 19:19

Genuine question:

Those saying pick a good lawyer, how do you know a good lawyer from a bad one if you have never appeared in court or been charged with anything before. I have only ever used a solicitor in my divorce and for conveyancing purposes.

I would also suggest he won't get a prison sentence if it's a first offence.

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:30

Main thing is no one was injured thank goodness. I very much doubt any kind of prison sentence will be issued as it is his first offence. He will be banned for several years and will face a hefty fine which I fully support, this is fair given the circumstances.

He seems more traumatised by spending a night in the cells. He’s had a huge bollocking off his Dad and me. Hopefully he has learned his lesson and thankfully no harm done. He’s in his room now all quiet eating his dinner feeling sorry for himself as he’ll need to get a bus to work in the morning.

OP posts:
Misunderestimated · 17/07/2022 19:33

For those citing sentencing following prosecution. A caution which looks like a slap on the wrist or an informal warning can have consequences. Sometimes, having one's day in court can be a better option and result in a cleaner slate, quicker.

www.gov.uk/tell-employer-or-college-about-criminal-record/check-your-conviction-caution

The 4 types of DBS checks are:

Basic - shows only cautions and convictions that are not spent.

Standard - shows all convictions, cautions, reprimands and final warnings, even if they’re spent

Enhanced - shows the same information as a standard check but also includes any information held by the police that they think is relevant to your application.

Enhanced with barred list - shows the same information as an enhanced check but also tells employers if you’ve been barred from doing the role you’re applying for.

GCHeretic · 17/07/2022 19:34

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:30

Main thing is no one was injured thank goodness. I very much doubt any kind of prison sentence will be issued as it is his first offence. He will be banned for several years and will face a hefty fine which I fully support, this is fair given the circumstances.

He seems more traumatised by spending a night in the cells. He’s had a huge bollocking off his Dad and me. Hopefully he has learned his lesson and thankfully no harm done. He’s in his room now all quiet eating his dinner feeling sorry for himself as he’ll need to get a bus to work in the morning.

Why doesn’t he have his bike?

It’d not normally be impounded unless there was an additional offence.

Was he uninsured?

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:38

GCHeretic · 17/07/2022 19:34

Why doesn’t he have his bike?

It’d not normally be impounded unless there was an additional offence.

Was he uninsured?

Yes he has insurance, the bike was impounded. I just assumed that was procedure as he was arrested and therefore escorted in a police car

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 17/07/2022 19:42

I would come down on him like a tonne of fucking brick. He needs very serious consequences, from the legal system and you. I'd be absolutely furious.

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:43

He’s had bloods taken at the station and he told me the wait for results could take 6 months (that sounds a really long time!), the results will then effect the length of ban / fine or whatever the consequences are. He has to pay £150 to get his bike back which we don’t have right now which is why he’s getting the bus tomorrow

OP posts:
drspouse · 17/07/2022 19:48

Surely you won't be giving him money to get his bike back after this??

bringbacksideburns · 17/07/2022 19:50

First things first - he’d be selling the bike to pay his fines. The bike would’ve gone.

Hes lucky he didn’t kill them both or someone else in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Luredbyapomegranate · 17/07/2022 19:51

Get a good solicitor as a priority

He needs to learn his lesson but you don’t want the book thrown at him

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:52

drspouse · 17/07/2022 19:48

Surely you won't be giving him money to get his bike back after this??

of course not, what made you think I would?

OP posts:
changingroom · 17/07/2022 19:54

Get the bike back and sell it to cover some of the fines.

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:55

changingroom · 17/07/2022 19:54

Get the bike back and sell it to cover some of the fines.

Good idea, but we don’t have the money to release it yet

OP posts:
SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:57

Luredbyapomegranate · 17/07/2022 19:51

Get a good solicitor as a priority

He needs to learn his lesson but you don’t want the book thrown at him

I agree, I think he’s learned his lesson and I feel the legal consequences will be punishment enough for him.

OP posts:
GCHeretic · 17/07/2022 19:58

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:38

Yes he has insurance, the bike was impounded. I just assumed that was procedure as he was arrested and therefore escorted in a police car

Maybe he just needs to pick it up then. He should probably do that while still insured, and then get it sold before his court date.

knackeredagain · 17/07/2022 19:59

Nishky32 · 17/07/2022 18:08

No appropriate adult if 17

Is that right? I thought it was 18. My son was interviewed by the police, as a witness, and they asked for me to be there when they spoke to him. He does have mild learning difficulties, which is on his file, so that may have been why?

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:59

GCHeretic · 17/07/2022 19:58

Maybe he just needs to pick it up then. He should probably do that while still insured, and then get it sold before his court date.

We will collect it once we can raise the funds for the release fee

OP posts:
GCHeretic · 17/07/2022 20:01

SareWall · 17/07/2022 19:55

Good idea, but we don’t have the money to release it yet

There will be a daily storage charge. Once his insurance is voided (he likely needs to tell them, check the policy wording, and cancel it before the company do) it will be very hard to recover the bike.

As he’s seventeen us it only worth a few hundred pounds anyway? If so it may be better to ask the police if he can just walk away, or whether he remains liable for storage indefinitely.

CrapBucket · 17/07/2022 20:08

My younger brother fucked up in a similar way at a similar age... my parents temporarily disowned him and he ended up in an extremely low place with only his big sis to turn to. It was incredibly stressful for me as I wasn't really mature enough to be much help myself!

Fast forward 20 years and all is fine and it didn't ruin his life. He is close with parents again but I will never forget their actions.

OP I hope your son has learnt his lesson - I'm glad no one was hurt and good luck in supporting him through the aftermath. And sorry about your holiday!

shinynewapple22 · 17/07/2022 20:11

@Nishky32 are you certain about that? My friend has worked acting as an appropriate adult and this includes 17 year olds .

Odrama456 · 17/07/2022 20:18

Why cut your holiday short?

your son is taking illegal drugs and driving.

i don’t think he should feel the full force of the law but he should feel the full force of how you feel disappointed in him, and he’s done very wrong.

hope he enjoys walking or bus for the next 3 years.

as well as increased insurance premiums.

dexterslockedintheshedagain · 17/07/2022 20:37

shinynewapple22 · 17/07/2022 20:11

@Nishky32 are you certain about that? My friend has worked acting as an appropriate adult and this includes 17 year olds .

17yr olds DO need an AA. Law changed in 2017, I think. Before then, they didn't.

PatsyJStone · 17/07/2022 21:01

Seen this a few times, and the illegal pillion passenger would just have a hood up and no helmet. Did his friend have a helmet on?

He needs to stop feeling sorry for himself, he's learning a big lesson here, it's going to affect him for several years now as he loses his independence. Also consider the financial impact when he next tries to get insurance after declaring he lost his licence, retaking his test etc.

It could've been so much worse he really needs to understand this.

I had to report a neighbours son for this as if anything happened to the passenger it would've been devastating.

Nishky32 · 17/07/2022 21:31

Ah. I am out of date….

beautyisthefaceisee · 17/07/2022 21:32

@Luredbyapomegranate why shouldn't he face the appropriate consequences? are there many good lawyers who could justify driving with a passenger on a motorbike while under the influence?