Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Do you think this monthly allowance is reasonable?

114 replies

bendmeoverbackwards · 08/10/2021 18:02

Dd (14.5) gets £50/month. This includes going out, non essential clothes and friends’ presents.

We pay for anything to do with school, essential items such as underwear and pyjamas, big items such as coats and we pay for her phone.

Dd is moaning. She loves clothes but I’ve pointed out she needs to learn to budget and leave some money for the end of the month.

Just trying to work out if the amount is reasonable.

OP posts:
CeeceeBloomingdale · 08/10/2021 19:31

I don’t give that much to my 14 yo. I probably only give her £10-20 a month but buy all food, clothes, pay her phone, pay entrance fees and buy friends gifts on top of that so maybe it is similar. Mine has no interest in buying things herself though.

Passthecake30 · 08/10/2021 19:37

Sounds fine if she’s not doing much socialising yet. I have a 11 & 13, the 13 yr old goes out occasionally - so I stick with the usual pocket money and then just top him up on the day. I’ve always said I will review as and when their needs change so they don’t stress or struggle to keep up with their peers.

Wriggleon · 08/10/2021 19:37

I would maybe cover friend's birthday presents but not if it's for lots. I would offer chores for more money, cleaning the car/ windows / garden that type of thing (not the dishes which I think should be part of family living) to get extra

Lonecatwithkitten · 09/10/2021 08:18

Until dad went to college show had £50 per month less than some more than others.

When she moved to sixth form college it changed to £140, but she had a bus pass to buy, also dance tights etc. She was also out the house for 12 hours a day so need to be able to buy drinks etc.
She has a taste for expensive clothes so as soon as she could she got a job in Starbucks and is now moving on to better paid work with perks.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 09/10/2021 08:23

Sounds reasonable. Mine had similar but also did babysitting and worked in a fish and chip shop to top it up.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 09/10/2021 08:26

One of mine was incredibly careful with her own money …. Would think nothing of throwing a load of lunch stuff from M&S in the basket if I was paying. The first time she went out in her own, so 11/12ish, she came home shocked “I’m starving we shared a sandwich, I didn’t realise how expensive it is to buy lunch out” Grin

scully29 · 09/10/2021 08:26

Why doesnt she get a job? Theres loads of jobs in hospitality just now? She could waitress occasional hours and have loads of money surely? 14s not too young to waitress.

Agadorsparticus · 09/10/2021 08:31

My 13yr old has £20pm. We pay for phone and clothes. She wastes her money on junk food whilst out with mates.

Evasmithsghost · 09/10/2021 08:35

@scully29

Why doesnt she get a job? Theres loads of jobs in hospitality just now? She could waitress occasional hours and have loads of money surely? 14s not too young to waitress.
Yes, it is.

You can work a maximum of 5 hours a day on a Saturday, which won’t fit easily with most shifts.

Plus, most places just won’t employ under 16s and to be honest the ones who do aren’t places I’d want my kids to work.

Plenty of time for jobs in the future.

I think £50 a month is fine, @bendmeoverbackwards but I’d probably compromise and up it to £60 if you can afford it.

MoiraNotRuby · 09/10/2021 08:37

Mine get £30, phone, clubs/hobbies paid for, presents for friends, essential clothes, haircuts, their choice of food in the cupboard.

They tend to spend their £30 on sweets, gaming, clothes and books. Although because books are GOOD I tend to order them and forget to ask DC for their money.

They do have quite a lot of rich friends which makes it tricky tbh. I don't think there is a right answer except don't give in to moaning Wink

backtoschool1234 · 09/10/2021 09:04

My DC get £30 but only has to cover extras, I pay for phone, essential clothes, clubs, etc. At 14.5 they could get a paper round if they wanted more.

KimchiJjigae · 09/10/2021 13:36

Traumatisednoodle

But she's only 14. EMA is based on a teen over 16 and is to enable them to stay in education, i.e., the cost of bus fair and lunches, additional textbooks etc., that a teen from a lower income background might struggle to maintain. Idea to encourage them to stay in education, when there might be pressure to get a job.

Unless you wanted to be generous, £130 a month would be far too much for a 14 year old who still has all essential costs covered. £50 sounds about right to me and perhaps more for one offs as needed.

DGFB · 09/10/2021 13:44

I think £12.50 a week isn’t enough for clothes, presents and entertaining yourself. One trip to the cinema and it’s gone

MondeoFan · 09/10/2021 13:45

My DD gets £20 a week that's £10 from me and £10 from her dad so £80 a month. I also pay £8 a month for her phone
She wastes a lot of it in my opinion on Frappes and milkshakes when out with friends but what can you do. She thinks nothing of paying £4.50 for a drink. I think wait until you're earning your own money then you'll see how expensive it is.

MondeoFan · 09/10/2021 13:47

Sorry meant to add she's 16 though

Viviennemary · 09/10/2021 13:50

If its to include clothes it isn't enough. I would give a bit less but pay for friends presents and clothes.

Pumpkinstace · 09/10/2021 13:57

I worked in a village shop.
We had loads of kids 16/17 come in asking about jobs but they never got taken on because you can't serve tobacco or alcohol if under 18.

Under 16s are subjected to restrictions on the number of hours they can work.

For a lot of businesses it isn't really feasible to be employing under 18s and it definitely isn't as easy to get a job at that age as it was back in the 70s and 80s.

TheUndeadLovelinessOfDemons · 09/10/2021 13:57

@bendmeoverbackwards

Dd (14.5) gets £50/month. This includes going out, non essential clothes and friends’ presents.

We pay for anything to do with school, essential items such as underwear and pyjamas, big items such as coats and we pay for her phone.

Dd is moaning. She loves clothes but I’ve pointed out she needs to learn to budget and leave some money for the end of the month.

Just trying to work out if the amount is reasonable.

DS 14 gets £24/month, but he's been saving for years, so he has over £600. He tends to spend very small amounts on things like sweets and drinks from the shop after school.
dizzygirl1 · 09/10/2021 14:00

DD 14 gets £15 a month - was £20 but wanted a newer phone than I could afford for Christmas so offered £5 a month of her pocket money towards it.

SolitaryTree · 09/10/2021 14:08

I’d say that was reasonable.
My 15 year old also gets £40 a month.
That’s to cover any socialising with friends but I do buy all of his clothes and if it’s a friends birthday or he wants to buy a Christmas present he will be given a budget that I will pay up to but if he wants to buy something more expensive he will have to put towards it.
I also pay for his phone.
I will probably keep it this way until he leaves college and maybe up it slightly if I can afford to at the time.
He has the opportunity to earn a bit extra every now and then for babysitting my younger son (12) for a couple of hours but that’s not something he can rely on as a regular source of pocket money as it’s not very often.
My younger son (12) has all of the same as above but gets £25 a month and obviously he doesn’t babysit my eldest.

HollysBush · 09/10/2021 14:10

😆 probably irrelevant, but I used to get £1.50 per week at 16 in early 90s. Mum would usually give me more if I asked (for cinema/pizza/video/clothes), but she liked the control over me and the option to say no if it was something she didn’t approve of. I personally think it’s good to give children a larger amount do they learn to budget. Of course you need to work out what her essential outgoings are and add on a bit extra for her preferred activities. But not too much that she doesn’t feel the need to get a job.

SolitaryTree · 09/10/2021 14:10

Sorry I just realised you said £50 a month and I said also £40 as I thought you’d said £40 too.
Very reasonable.

LynetteScavo · 09/10/2021 14:53

At that age DD had £40 per month, but we paid for everything - friends birthday presents, cinema etc. She used the money to buy clothes I absolutely hated and refused to buy her (and she usually only wore once anyway) and face masks and sweets. I think it's important for teens to have money they can spend on absolutely anything without telling you, if you expect them to learn to budget they need a decent budget. I think 60pm would be more realistic.

3WildOnes · 09/10/2021 15:12

Almost 20 years ago I used to get an allowance of £100 a month. I had an active social life! Dinners out, trips to the cinema or bowling, train tickets, a few drinks in the pub on a night out etc… I also had part time jobs waitressing and babysitting. I would save the money from my job for big outings like concerts and theme parks and also for clothes.
I guess I depends on her social circle though, I would have been left out of a lot of socialising if I hadn’t had as much.

Thatsplentyjack · 09/10/2021 15:14

I used to get 100 a month 16 year ago and my parents weren't well off. Honestly, she won't get much for £12.50 a week.