Disappointed with DS A level choices

[Bagamoyo1]

I know I’m being unreasonable, and I know this is a first world problem, but I can’t help it. I wanted to post to see if others can share experiences and stop me feeling so down about it.

DS has just started year 12. Since year 7 he’s been good at French and really enjoyed it. From the start he knew he wanted to do French A level. He’s just started his courses (day 8 today) - French, history and geography.

He’s moved schools for 6th form (his original high school don’t have a 6th form), and he’s just announced that he’s hating French, and wants to give it up. He says it’s harder than GCSE, and he’s just not enjoying it, and can’t face 2 years of it. He wants to switch to sociology.

I can’t help thinking he wants to change because lots of his friends are doing sociology, and it’s basically way easier than French.

I’m worried he’ll regret it. Rightly or wrongly, sociology is seen by many as an easy (and therefore less valuable) option, and I honestly think that once he’s settled in his new school, he’ll find the French more manageable. But obviously he doesn’t have that luxury - if he’s going to switch he has to do it asap.

I haven’t let on how I feel. I’ve just said he needs to think carefully, talk to the teachers, and do whatever he feels most comfortable with.

But how can I stop myself feeling so disappointed? He got a distinction in French some GCSE work, and was a shining star for the whole course. He’s been naturally gifted at it since day 1.

I just need to find a way to feel positive about all this.

He could do both? 4 A levels? If he’s actually really keen to do sociology then he’d be up for it..?

Quite frankly, I was incredible at GCSE French, got an A* and was pretty much top of the class, I was really good!

I HATED A-Level French, it was so hard, and so different, it made me feel ill and I cried before most classes. I eventually had to have a meeting with the Headteacher in order to be able to give it up! Don't pust it and let him switch!

FWIW my own experience and years ago. I was in the same position and wanted to drop it (and switch to History in my case). I got persuaded to carry on, hated every minute and eventually completely failed the A level. I still wish I’d taken History.

Well, one of the joys of language learning is really being able to speak it. Another joy is being exposed to other cultures and appreciating different mindsets, which is where the culture/ set texts part of the ‘A’ level course comes in. And yes, he could pick it up later, but is less likely to. He could also develop his interest in Sociology later especially as he won’t need to refine any language skills to be able to do this.

I think the way you feel better about it is by listening and discussing with him, and neither of you trying to make snap decisions. Yes of course if he wants to swap course he needs to act fast, but that doesn't mean he has to decide today.

My DD has just finished Sociology A level (FWIW alongside English Lit and History), and found it a fascinating and rigorous course which was well regarded by unis. If he really wants to drop French after thinking and talking through all the pros and cons, then Sociology sounds like a good complement to his other subjects.

When is his next French lesson? When is the deadline for course changes? Some subjects are a big leap at A level, but that doesn't always mean they're the wrong choice, or that they won't get easier with time. What were the reasons he was initially so set on French? What does he want to do next?

@Glitterbiscuits

Have you heard of 'facilitating subjects' for A level choices? These are the subjects that Unis hold in high regard for applications for most degrees.

www.theuniguide.co.uk/advice/a-level-choices/six-things-you-need-to-know-before-making-your-a-level-choices

One of my DC did A level French. They talked a lot about things like social issues and watched some quite hard hitting French films.
They didn't know the words for knife and fork though!
They did well but really put some effort in, making flash cards, using things like DuoLingo etc

It's early days to make a swap though. How long do you think you could give it before changing? Another couple of weeks might make a difference

Facilitating subjects are NOT subjects that universities hld in high regard.

They are subjects that keep the maximum number of options open if a student starts A levels not knowing what degree they want to study. And you only need two of them anyway. History and Geography both fit the bill for someone presumably interested in humanities type subjects.

Another one chiming in to say the jump between GCSE and A level is so hard. You can get a good grade at gcse by learning like a parrot, but A level you really have to LEARN the language and then have the added struggle that languages are rarely taught well.

He can always pick up french again in the future.

@ZenNudist

Is he doing general studies? If you do a language a level it makes that bit of the course much easier.

Almost no schools offer General Studies these days as many universities don't accept it for entrance.

@Bagamoyo1 I can sympathise and empathise. I have a late August (30th) born now 19yr old. At GCSE I made him take Spanish even though he was adamant he didn't want to do it. He made no effort at all for 2 yrs (often had the teacher on the phone) and eventually got a 5. I'm glad he got a 5 - he still reminds me he hated it and I made him do it; he can't remember any of it and it was a waste of time. At A level I learnt to stay out of things. You can not force them - they have to learn by their own experience and mistakes. Unfortunately for my DS he missed a great deal of yr 13 due to a dx of a severe and life changing autoimmune disease (another story but he's on a raft of immunosuppressants) he got not great A level results and is currently just doing a min wage job he hates. However, he's matured and learnt a lot by making his own choices and having his own experiences. He has also realised he needs to study again to get a better job! Fwiw I'd let your son change the french at school but maybe encourage him to keep it up as a hobby. If he hates it, he hates it I doubt very much carrying it on will change his mind.

And I did sociology (along with Chemistry and Biology) it was my favourite subject and I got an A - mainly because I really enjoyed it! Wish now I'd studied it at uni instead of going down a science route.

What uni course does he want to do and what does he need to get there? Then he needs to find the path of least resistance towards that. Most universities accept sociology just fine and if he feels he’s more likely to get a high grade there then he should do that. Sounds like he’s taking some good initiative.

My DS is doing his french A'level. He was really good at it at gcse but absolute hates it now. Like, really hates it. He's also doing history and politics and he loves them. With hindsight he'd never have picked french even though he got an 8 in his gcse.
Let your DS choose something he enjoys. Two years of studying a hard subject you're not enjoying is a looooong time.

Has DS ever done any sociology? He might dislike that, too!

Can he do an AS in French alongside the A levels? That’s what I did and (10,000 years ago) AS level was much more focused on being able to use the language in daily life than literature etc. Having said that I can’t speak French now!!

Also to share that I LOVED chemistry at GCSE. Definitely thought I’d study it at university. A Level was such a leap and my worst subject. Sometimes you reach the limit of what you can do.

I took sciences - very hard.
But was better at languages.
A level languages arent that hard if you are good at them. I later did a different language gcse -A* and Alevel A.
They do require you to keep on top of vocab. Practise the grammar.

Does he want to change to be with friends.
I would be asking how many boys/girls are in each class.

It is very sad some schools arent doing alevel languages.
My relative has done very well from learning languages. The obvious downside (?)is that jobs were not in the uk. But that may change with all the WFH.
It does sound like gcses arent really doing a job to separate what you are good at. I think they made maths harder since i did gcse maybe languages need to be harder. Maybe by taking gcse language early and doing AS?

My husband went to university to learn languages and economics. He is fluent in English (native) French and Spanish. He has used French over the years but not as much because it's a language not widely spoken in the world.
Spanish he uses every day because he married me (I'm Mexican) he doesn't enjoy speaking French any more.
Don't duel on it he can always pick it up later if he wants to.
Here in the UK languages aren't unfortunately very popular choice.

There are quite a few universities that allow students to pick optional language modules at various levels regardless of subject choice.

@clary

op MFL is my subject and it's great that he did so well at GCSE. I do think it's a big leap, though there are some ideas in this thread that may be out of date.

He will study one book and one film, counting for a fifth of his marks.
He won't be writing essays about French government, but he will study political and social themes and need to speak about them and answer questions in a reading and listening paper.

If he is going to change it needs to be now. Can you unpick in a bit more detail why sociology? Or is it simply "not French"? Does he dislike the French teacher perhaps? An MFL A level is usually a small group so that may count.

I sympathise - my dd switched after a few days from music to (funnily enough) French, but she has done worse in GCSE music than expected and the A level was focusing on the bits she found tough, so it made sense. An MFL A level is always good, but sociology is also a very strong choice and by no means easy. Facilitating subjects mentioned by a pp are no longer a factor.

Thank you - a large part of what he dislikes is that there are only 6 of them in the class, and only one other boy, who apparently completely ignores him. The whole class is apparently quite unfriendly, so no friendly chatter. The teacher asks questions and there is total silence, which makes DS feel uneasy and lost. He feels he has to break the silence by answering, but isn't confident in what he's saying.

So a lot of it sounds like a combination of less-than-brilliant teaching, and a group of kids who have only just met.

These are problems which are likely to resolve with time, which is why he (and I) are worried he might regret dropping the subject.

My dad marched me back down to the college and made me change my A Level choices (it was a while ago now, art and history I think) and signed me up for a btec in art and design. Which I hated. All because at 15/16 I had mentioned graphic design in passing and done it at GCSE (because I had to pick something and I didn't want to do CDT) I'm not bad at art but I am by no means at graphic designer level and I knew that as well then as I do now.

I didn't stick at it once I realised they couldn't actually make me go and as a result didn't end up doing any a levels at all. I deeply resented having that decision taken away from me and it started a chain of events that led to me leaving home quite young, with hindsight I can see that he was just trying to do what he thought was best but at the time I just felt controlled. I ended up doing a vocational course in Animal management when I was in my late teens, early twenties and enjoyed it massively. I do regret that wasted time between 16 and 19 though. I think having some a levels would have been good for me. Even if they weren't in the field I ended up pursuing.

Sociology isn't an 'easy' subject, it works well with his other choices. There are plenty of ways to continue learning French without having to do it at a level that could end up destroying any joy he takes in the language. If this is what he wants, I would support him in that. Like others have said the main thing is getting the a levels in the first place.

Just to clarify - I'm not pushing him in any direction at all. He asks my opinion on these things, and I talk through the pros and cons with him.

He got up this morning saying he thinks he should keep going with French, but literally minute to minute he isn't sure.

Most of the replies on this thread have been really useful - thank you to everyone who's shared their experiences.

I studied sociology myself as part of my medical training, so I have a reasonable idea of the subject matter. I think DS would find it quite easy, at times interesting but at times boring, and I'm sure he could get a good grade if he worked hard at it.

He's just upset and confused at his feelings about French now, having been so fond of the subject for so long. The way he talks is similar to how someone feels when they find themselves falling out of love with a previously beloved partner. Nothing is straightforward in life!

It is definitely a big jump from GCSE to A Level with languages. I did french and Spanish and they were the subjects I did best in at GCSE (and carried on Spanish to degree level). I remember being terrified I’d made a huge mistake at the start of a level. But I got there and did really well (As at a level and a first class degree). I’m my advice would be to stick it out, he will love it again once the shock wears off.

It sounds like its the group dynamic rather than the subject itself from what you're saying, and that the teacher isn't handling it very well. It's still early days, so that could change. If it were my son I'd be advising him to hold out just a little longer to see, but to change if he really feels that he'll be miserable in those classes.

More on my comment about facilitating subjects.
This article has some interesting links.

schoolsweek.co.uk/russell-group-ditches-facilitating-subjects-a-level-list/

And this is probably helpful too.
Maybe not so much to the Op's situation but to others

www.informedchoices.ac.uk/subjects

Yes. People (especially many schools) totally took the concept of facilitating subjects the wrong way and pedalled them as the only subjects of value when even the RG universities who originally came up with the concept never meant it in that way.

Teen parenting is so hard.

It's his choice what to study.

Talking as someone who was forced to study what my parents wanted, it's absolutely miserable and a slog.