16 year old teenager moving out on 18th bday

[Lotty32]

DD is determined to move out. Have discussed money etc but she knows best!
Is this normal for a headstrong DD?

She’s 16, and planning to move out at 18? I’d file that under ‘the bridge to cross when we get there’, and forget about it.

is she 16 now and making plans to move out in 2 years, which is quite a way off and who knows what she will be doing then. Does she plan on going to college/uni or getting a job. She will need to start saving money now to put down and buy things. I would just go along with it at this stage.

See what happens in two years I say.

We will miss you darling of course, but if that's what you want we'll allow you to be completely independent. Could you hoover the lounge while I wash up?

I'd make non committal noises such as 'Oh right,' and move on.

I don't imagine on the morning of her 18th birthday she'll wake up to discover she has full time work, references, a deposit and a month's rent up front as well as the wherewithal to live for the next four weeks until some more comes in. But hey, ho. Not worth arguing about now.

Yeah, pretty normal for 16 year olds with little life experience I'd say.

@CherryValance - actually that's much better

Time for some financial management sessions..
Find out potential council tax /water /bill examples for areas she likes.
Food shopping costs.
Extras.
Suggest she needs to be saving hard now...
Don't think she will be reigning in now for her life in 2 years...
Be supportive not sarky though... I left home under a cloud a week past 17 and my relationship with dm never recovered..

Yes, just play along, the more you tell her it's a bad idea the more she'll be determined to do it. If she can actually make it happen, well done.

Agree with everyone else, just go along with it. 16 to 18 is a long time! Cross that bridge when you come to it.

Doesnt every teenager declare they’re leaving home as soon as they’re 18?

Very normal. Wouldn’t even raise an eyebrow in this house.

FWIW op I left at 19 and it was the best thing I ever did.

Coming at it from a different perspective for you op. I wasn't sure at 16 if I was going to be going to university at 18, however I had the conversation with my mum that if I didn't go to uni I wanted to move out and gain independence.
I didn't go to uni, and moved out 2 months after I turned 18. Have lived independently now for 10 years.
I did have a job however alongside going to college, and because we'd had that discussion my mum didn't make me pay rent but allowed me to save it for my own little nest egg.

I was going to move out when I was 16. My parents helped get me details of places to rent and offered lots of encouragement and advice.
They knew full well I wouldn't be able to afford it on the crappy wage from my weekend job but didn't say. Just let me come to my own conclusions.
I ended up leaving at 18 to go to uni.

Mine moved out at 17 (but it was for a purpose to be able to attend a college 45 miles from home where the original plan was for her to commute with Dh who works in the same city but illness prevented that)

But yes, depending what her plans are for education/work over the next two years then she will come to realise it’s not that easy.

I moved out at 18. No problems at all at home I just wanted to let my hair down and be a grown up. My mum did start a 'bottom drawer' for me with things like towels, cooking equipment etc which was lovely. I wouldn't worry too much yet but don't try and stop her. Encourage her to save and as a PP suggests time for her to learn some financial manager.

To be fair she might move out when she’s 18. 🤷‍♀️ It’s not unheard of.
Ds2 is 18 and still living at home but many of his friends are in flat shares.

I imagine lockdown has a lot to do with this ... it’s hard for our teens to be locked up with their parents for weeks on end.

Its absolutely normal and healthy for a 16 yr old to want and plan to move out at 18

Whether it will happen or not is a different matter! But its always a good idea regardless for her to start saving and learning thw skills to becoming independent

I did leave home at 16... but that was a long time ago and did a house share and had a fulltime job....
does she work now? If shes talking about 2 years time say ok ...lots of people elave home at 18 so thats not that unusual -if they go to uni/services jobs etc many really never move back..
there is nothing wrong with independence
I would suggest she picks her next education options to suit...and you together look at what financial/house mangement skills she may need-
If shes just stropping then say thats nice dear but either way she will need preparing to leave home.. you sound like you are surprised ...

According to my mum, I started announcing that I was moving out on my 18th birthday at the age of 12! 😆 Pretty sure it's a normal teenager thing to say!

That's nothing, when I grow up I'm going to be a racing driver and marry Claudia Schiffer.

Nod and smile, nod and smile

I moved out when I was 17 so don't really get the angst. Just say 'brilliant, you'll love being independent, let's check out the price of flat shares' and crack on with your day.

Isn’t it pretty normal to leave home at 18? I did, as did DH and the majority of our friends.

Yep that was me

And I did it too

I moved out to go to uni but then came back in the holidays
Officially moved out as soon as uni had finished , so age 20, 21 I guess