To encourage parents to be involved in their teenagers job applications?!

[sirmione16]

I'm hiring for a part time weekend staff, ideal for a young person. However in the past week I've had multiple CVs with embarrassing opening paragraphs, awful spelling and grammar, people not answering the phone then texting "who is this" when they applied the day before (I use a work mobile and leave a message) Now, I've just had a girl reply that she can't do a phone interview because she has anxiety but would like a trial shift opportunity. When I replied very politely thanking her for her application and for being honest, and that anxiety would not be an issue in some positions however the role wouldn't suit her if she finds a telephone interview hard - her literal reply was "wow OK, that'll teach me for being honest with anyone" that's the whole email. I'm godsmacked. Fortunately I have had some successful interviews and trials, but this attitude is awful - aren't schools teaching CV writing any more? Aren't parents guiding teenagers on professionalism and conduct?! What is going on?!

There are lots of incorrect assumptions on this thread. I have battled with anxiety and depression on and off my whole life. My anxiety has been drooling at times but it has never stopped me being very effective and competent in customer facing roles. It really depends on how it affects you and what the triggers are. Personally I find dealing with customers really helps - I don't think about my anxieties when dealing with other people in that context. Not sure why. Socialising however can make me very anxious at times but usually before and afterwards. These things are not as simple as you think and people shouldn't make assumptions about a particular person's capabilities based on a diagnosis.

You discriminate led against her based on her declared ill health issue. She asked for a reasonable adjustment (which in my mind shows some maturity of thinking) and you dismissed it out of hand.
You state the job role as fast paced and customer facing requiring good communication skills, where did she say she couldn't do this? Is it customer facing or is it down the phone? If phone based you might have an argument but as you haven't mentioned this it is unlikely this is the case. Oh and who doesn't describe their job as fast paced these days, I tend to mentally change that to not enough staff and likely to make mistakes.

You are chucking the babies out with the bath water.

Equality Act 2010

Why do people not answer the phone if they don't recognise the number? What do they think is going to happen if they do?

I'm 20 and had a few waitressing jobs from the age of 16 - I suffered quite badly with anxiety, and I still do a bit, always have a slight feeling of dread when an unknown number calls!
However I forced myself to do telephone interviews even when I was panicking. I quite frankly would never apply for a job, let alone a customer facing one if I wasn't even willing to do an interview!!

My opinion is that if this girl's anxiety was that bad then she should've really sought some help for that rather than applying for a job, being lucky enough to get an interview then being extremely rude to the interviewer.
I also work in mental health. Just what I think though.

That’s what most people think.

I'm not sure about the 'discrimination' part, that's a bit of a difficult one. Surely she would have found an in person interview just as difficult as a phone interview?
I mean, the phone interview basically consists of having to talk to someone you don't know. That also sums up what customer facing roles are.

I agree with you op. Surely everyone has anxiety regarding interviews!

@Clymene ah it's ok. Luckily I'm quite an easy going person (apart from the obvious!) so generally am able to just get on with it or remove myself from a situation and no longer feel guilty about it.

I was in my job for 3 years before I felt the need to tell anyone about it and that was just because I got promoted a couple of times to a position with lots of travel and meetings and therefore actually needed allowances to be made. Before that I could just blag it.

I'm really fortunate that DP is fab about it too and can see now when I'm not comfortable in a situation.

There are people with different personalities to mine that would struggle much more, and many people with shitty partners (something that MN has taught me)! The anxiety is crap but there are people who have it much worse. Thank you though

WRT to OP, I agree that young people should be given help and guidance from parents where possible when first applying for jobs. The etiquette and formality expected in letters and emails to potential employers will not be something they are familiar with. Also many of them have absolutely no telephone manner because they have grown up communicating using face time and social media and rarely make phone calls other than to say 'mum can you pick me up'. We grew up answering the landline at home taking messages for parents and having to make polite conversation with friends and relatives, this is all alien to today's teens. Our landline is practically redundant and I'm not sure either of my DC have used it for ages.

My teenager lives 80 miles away, with her husband, and deals with her own job applications. I don't think she'd take to kindly to my counsel, seeing as she left home 3 years ago.

@GiveHerHellFromUs

Just looked at my DS work experience application.

It had some unusual sentences, such as “I absolutely promise to not make any trouble with anyone”, which to me as a work-experience employer would set alarm bells ringing

But he did not want my advice

He’s only 14 though

YANBU, we gave our DS a bit of guidance before he got his first job, a paper round (we even did the paper round for him on a few occasions when he was on a school trip etc so as not to let his customers down ). He did the job for a year and progressed to a pot wash position in a local restaurant.

He politely handed in his notice for the paper round, giving four weeks notice, the person in charge of the paper round later stopped me in in the street to say he had been the only youngster they had never had complaints about.

It’s not rocket science to give your child a bit of help, DS is now at uni and had lined up interviews for part time work before he had left home. Some of my friends still tell me ‘it’s so difficult for students to find jobs in uni towns ’.

In my role at work I offer work experience opportunities to lots of young people, the difference in attitudes, initiative, work ethic is amazing. And it is tough and very sad that those who have parental support and encouragement generally do a lot better than those who don’t.

I can assure you that schools do teach cv writing and how to approach interviews. I am a Y11 (15-16) tutor and I can not explain the pain and time I invested in 25 students getting cvs completed and in a decent condition for our work experience interview day. The problem is within their peer group many (not all) teenagers think they know everything and will not listen to mum/dad/teacher. They know best. Only the pain of being rejected from real jobs will educate them that what we teach matters. In many cases mum & dad taking on the task only enables their behaviour and arrogance.

Where does all the arrogance come from?

@woodlands01 my school didn't have any lessons/work experience days on how to approach interviews.

We did do a bullshit qualification called a Certificate of Personal Effectiveness where we were 'taught' to write CVs by the worlds most incompetent cover supervisor (permanent staff member) who only got the job because she was the art teachers niece.

This was only 8 years ago. I think it depends on the school.

I have a friend who has anxiety and depression to the point where it is classified as a disability.

Their anxiety is significantly more like to manifest itself in a really debilitating way relation to job interviews etc. than in day to day circumstances, though it still makes her very unwell.

She is fantastic at her job, doing public speaking, working with small groups and taking to new people, as well as quickly building rapport with people.

It would be a real error in the part of an employer to assume her ability to do a telephone interview or otherwise was representative of her ability at the job.

That is the whole point of reasonable adjustments, to stop that discrimination taking place.

And actually I don't think "everyone" has anxiety in relation to interviews. I don't. I tend to get a little bit nervous but really not very much at all, mainly just hyped. They don't give me any of the clinical symptoms of anxiety or impact my ability to do them effectively.

Torchlight, my DS (14) days his generation have been told they are wonderful, clever and great all their lives by their parents (esp. if middle class)

And that venturing out in the real world then can be a bit of a shock as there are no “gold stars for participating” etc. For him the “real world” was army cadets which is not very mollycoddling!

Surely not all parents? I'm middle class and not like that with my kids...

I believe you! It was just his observation