Teenagers on holiday

[orangeicecream]

I am a single parent on an abroad sunshine holiday with 3 teenagers or almost teens... Aged 12, 13 and 17. They are so boring..... They don't want to do anything except sit staring at their phones.... Don't want to go to the pool, beach, restaurant, bar, play cards or do any sporting activities.... Anything.... I remember holidays (pre-mobiles) being in the pool all day and trying to meet other teens..... Its all different and antisocial now. ... I'm left doing things on my own and wondering what was the point of spending money on this holiday.

So do I:
Remove the phones and force them to come out? AIBU... Accept the boredom is part of the teenage years? Don't take them on holiday again? Thought welcome :)

What I find works for my 2 teens (both with ASD) is to have an "up" day then a "down" day. We have done several city breaks and I book for a longer stay because of this. So if we go on a trip or go sightseeing one day, then the next day there is zero expectation of them at all- they don't even have to get out of bed/PJs . I find that easier for me too, then I don't get frustrated on those days that they are doing nothing and not interacting because I have set that day aside to relax and I just read a book/Netflix and chill. This may work for others in shorter chunks of time each day.

Could've written this post too!! Went on a lovely holiday for two weeks in the Algarve and my DSs aged 14&16 were miserable. I told them how ungrateful I thought they were, we all argued. We spent loads on nice food. Came home last week and they are back to happy and everything is calm!!

We did the driving through the channel tunnel, a few nights in Belgium, a few nights in France, all off the beaten track, a bit of sightseeing, lovely beaches, took trains in Belgium, bit of local culture. Aso did South of France, again took local trains all around.
Being in one place with bored teens is hard bloody work. We learned the hard way.

I do that as a single parent. When there is a DP/DH it may be easier to divide and conquer.

Also, I have never tried it in a beach/pool type place. I think the "up" days for us has to involve something worth seeing. And we each chose a day, so end up with 3 days out, 3 days in.

We took ours on a holiday of a lifetime type holiday last year & couldn't persuade them to do stuff. This year we haven't bothered - we had a week away without them & will do the same in September. I think they have been a bit surprised after years of me saying "you might as well be at home in your bedroom" they finally are. A lot cheaper for us & fewer arguments!

I really like the idea of one day off, one day on. My main issue is that DH finds it hard to accept that DS just wants to vegetate, so this could be a way of keeping everyone happy or at least mollified

We couldn’t get ours out of bed before noon and dh and I can’t sleep past 8am. It’s been tricky - we’re on different body clocks, they want to do stuff with us and are happy to put down the screens but don’t want to get out of bed - we’ve tried all sorts of solutions but it feels like we should just be on different holidays at times🙄

I quite like the one day on one day off too. I have booked this for February half term. Participation is not optional.

Not sure how that will work at the minute to be honest!

I must admit to looking forward to a couple of UK breaks we are planning to take when DS is away on school trips. Walking with the dog and staying in a cottage that may not even have WiFi

Totally agree. Next year I'm not booking anything I'll see how they are. School holidays are bloody expensive and I'll be damned if I'm spending money on my teens being bored!!

Stopped taking my DC on holiday when they got to 14. Best thing ever. My DW and I could do exactly what we wanted.

go on your own

I honestly don't see the point in spending £££ for them (and you!) to not enjoy it.

I would very honestly go on your own, and then let them have a day out or a weekend away doing something they will actually take part in like a theme park or something they have a real interest in.

no point flying to a different country to stare at your phone when you could do the same at home for free imo!

We went away on a short haul flight and kept on the move for a week.

I would like to stay in one, quiet place but it will not work right now. They are ok with sightseeing in cities and visiting museums so that is what we do. Not every teen likes that so I would be not going at all if they would not cooperate.

They have moaned about a villa with pool in the past so that is off the agenda. They do not like the beach. Long ago I imagined we would have a family where the older kids did watersports while I read poolside but they have long since rebelled against kayaking and the like. Bastards .

We went interailing together a few years, but none of us are beach types. It was great, but we spent quite a lot of money.

Yes it is an expensive type of holiday per day.

Thank God it's not just me! Yes to up day and down day. I've also booked us on a single parents' holiday which hopefully will persuade DD13 to look up from a screen without whinging because I don't want to be stuck in a hotel room for a week!

I’m beginning to think that taking a friend along is the answer!

Neilson holidays are the way to go.

Neilson holidays look amazing but are very expensive.

They do not like the beach. Long ago I imagined we would have a family where the older kids did watersports while I read poolside but they have long since rebelled against kayaking and the like. Bastards
I'm so glad it's not just mine. We went to a Neilson type place without children & I saw all these teens having fun & knew that my lot would refuse to join in! It would have been a dream come true for me at that age.

Looks like there's a business opportunity for holiday operators to provide some sort of kennels for teenagers where they could stay plugged in to their screens and not spoil it for their families

Yes, like those capsule hotels in Japan. Book your child in at the airport - no need to pay for their airfare, so book them in at Heathrow.

Yes, like those drawers that pe

Ooops, I knew I'd typed that twice!

Thank god I'm not alone, my 13 year old ds whinged all the way through our 2 weeks in Corfu last year. Got home and declared it his favourite holiday ever 🤬. So we are back off to Corfu for 2 more glorious happy weeks soon... if it goes the same way this year then I'm happily not going away next year.

They are expensive Rookie. Cheaper at Oct half term but I will leave Neilsen to now ExH as he loves the water sports bit and I am lukewarm about it! Loved the yoga, tennis and swimming but I don’t need to pay their prices for that.

Mine are happy to join in but we do have the varying body clocks thing, one teen is up at 6 every day and one wants to sleep till 11.

What we find works is planning the holiday together so they agree with where we are going and the type of holiday it is. Only go for one week. Never go to a pool /beach/resort/villa/sunshine type holiday.

We usually go self catering, either a cottage or static caravan/holiday lodge on a park, or city breaks in an apartment. Sightseeing, crazy golf, walking, cycling, ball games, a bit of lazing around in the accommodation, a bit of swimming pool/beach but maximum of one or two half days for the latter - I remember hating holidays as a child where we spent all day every day at the beach, it was so boring. Also beach time is for paddling, rock pooling, crabbing for us, rather than trying to sunbathe or read so we pick our beaches carefully, we prefer to go to the beach in the evening when it's cooler/quieter.