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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Would you leave a 12 and 15yo home alone in the evening

33 replies

hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 17:54

We have done so before when local, however this is a show in London, so we would be a couple of hours away if there was a problem. Would be from 6pm till midnight-ish. In the summer holidays, clearly would either leave pizza or money for takeaway. Oldest is male if that makes any difference.

OP posts:
PonderingPanda · 16/06/2019 17:55

What is your contingency plan if there is an issue?

I.e who is close by that they can call upon

lovelyupnorth · 16/06/2019 17:57

Yes.

Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 18:01

We have good neighbours (would need to check who would be there as middle of August) and several friends within walking distance.

OP posts:
Yerroblemom1923 · 16/06/2019 18:04

Yes. You know your own children and whether they'd be tempted to advertise their family home as a party venue all over Fbk or (hopefully)not. If they're likely to behave responsibly and not invite people over/drink/take advantage etc then go for it

Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 18:06

Should have said both NT, no SEN the 15yo more sensible than the 12yo

OP posts:
Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 18:07

Sounds like a yes then...

OP posts:
stucknoue · 16/06/2019 18:07

Yes, by 16 they can leave home legally! But I would have a contingency plan in place, a neighbour or friend who they can call in emergency

AChickenCalledKorma · 16/06/2019 18:08

Yes, my two are now 13 and 16 and we have done this once or twice. But only once they were happy for us to do so and always with someone we trust being aware that they are alone and that they may call if they need help. Also neither of them are prone to throwing parties; they are more likely to watch an entire box set and eat too much ice cream.

Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 18:10

I think they'd be fine, they have been home together for an inset day and indeed box sets and dominos went down. It's just being a train ride away.

OP posts:
Hecateh · 16/06/2019 18:13

Yes - so long as there is a neighbour they know and like - and that they generally get on with each other.

stepup123 · 16/06/2019 18:13

I think they'll be fine! I used to babysit at 15. I know you're a distance away, but as long as they can have an adult to turn to in an emergency, they'll be fine!

anothernotherone · 16/06/2019 18:18

Yes, as long as a trusted neighbor was home to phone in case of very, very unlikely emergency. I'd probably leave my older 2, who are 14 and nearly 12, in that situation but it doesn't arise because I wouldn't yet leave them very late evening in charge of my youngest who is 8.

CitadelsofScience · 16/06/2019 18:20

I would, my dd was regularly babysitting other people's children at 15/16.

Almahart · 16/06/2019 18:21

Yes if neighbour on hand

anothernotherone · 16/06/2019 18:32

When I used to babysit at 16 the assumption was always that the parents could get home in case of emergency or that one of my own parents would be my emergency contact.

I don't think anyone leaves 16 year olds babysitting late into the night completely and utterly without back up aside from the emergency services do they - or did they, even in the 80s and 90s?

I babysat a baby still on milk only, so given how long ago it was he must have been under 4 months, and his very small toddler brother, every Saturday night until about 2am, the summer holidays when I had only just turned 16 - and yes I know 16 year olds can have babies, but I can't believe parents leave an unrelated and largely unknown 16 year old in charge of such very young children if they don't have emergency back up within a relatively short drive...

I never phoned my parents, but the parents I babysat for were their friends - they barely knew me as I was only home in the holidays. I can't imagine they'd have left their tiny children with me without knowing my parents were emergency back up, nor that it was different for others babysitting non relatives at 16.

OP's situation is absolutely fine, I'm not sure all the flippant "I was babysitting for hoards of strangers at 12" comments are that relevant though.

boredboredboredboredbored · 16/06/2019 18:37

Mine are 15 & 14 and yes I'd leave them. At 12 & 15 providing they are sensible and have an adult they can call on in emergency then I would.

WindsweptEgret · 16/06/2019 18:39

Yes, wouldn't leave just the 12 year old, but with the 15 year old I would. I leave my 13 year old alone until about 10 pm with an emergency contact within about 30 minutes drive away if he can't get hold of me.

ConfCall · 16/06/2019 18:43

Yes, absolutely. Enjoy your evening!

Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 18:55

There is a lovely lady who babysat them when younger (very local), I think I will tell them to call her if there is a problem,

OP posts:
DramaAlpaca · 16/06/2019 18:58

Mine are grown up now, but I could leave them at that age. They were sensible & got on well together.

Original poster
hopefulhalf · 16/06/2019 19:01

and obviously tell her ! Also give a bottle of wine to say thanks afterwards.

OP posts:
MirandaWest · 16/06/2019 19:04

Mine are 13 and 15 and I would

iMatter · 16/06/2019 19:06

As you have neighbours and a plan, yes I would leave them.

We are in the middle of nowhere, no neighbours, surrounded by fields and a national park so I wouldn't if I was 2 hours away.

My 2 are 13 and 14 and we leave them until late if we're local. Ds2 does however call me if we're even 10 minutes late...

DizzySue · 16/06/2019 19:10

Yes I would.

As long as neighbour or friend close by was available in case of emergency.

Redcrayons · 16/06/2019 19:14

I probably wouldn't go past 9pm tbh.

I'm aware I'm very out of step with most MN though.

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