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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Should DD18 quit her job?

42 replies

flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:41

DD is 18 and in college, she is doing an extra year due to dropping out in her first year but is now due to finish in may 2018. She is looking to go to uni in September 2018 and has decided on her uni and course. She however has just gotten a part time job this month, she doesn't mind the job but now wants to quit to focus on her college work and be able to concentrate on getting into university and the right grades. I don't like the idea of her leaving already after only a few shifts, she works 20 hours a week, £5.55ph and in fast food restaurants. What would you suggest? I was proud of her getting the job so she could pay for her phone, driving lessons, holidays, etc. what do you think she should do?

OP posts:
StevieNicksSilverSpring · 05/09/2017 19:44

How many hours is she in classes?

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:45

Tuesday to fridays, 9:30am to 5pm

OP posts:
Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:45

but is also in monday afternoons for her gcse English resit

OP posts:
flissfloss65 · 05/09/2017 19:45

That sounds a lot of hours. My ds is in the same year and school advised a maximum of ten hours paid work a week. Could she cut down her hours?

My ds works 7 hours every Saturday.

Justmuddlingalong · 05/09/2017 19:47

Who will pay for all of those things if she does give up the job?

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:48

I can recommend it to her but she did already sign the 20 hour contract. Another problem is we are 45 minutes away from the centre where her work and college are so after travelling she's also not getting much time for assessments and college work at home. I think she's regretting working in such a high maintenance, fast paced environment

OP posts:
Crumbs1 · 05/09/2017 19:48

Ours were never allowed to work in term time during sixth form except the odd babysitting. Exam results and the longer game were more important.

MyBrilliantDisguise · 05/09/2017 19:49

I taught in a college. Everyone with anything about them had a job, not only for the money and the experience, but for the personal statement. It's incredibly hard to write a full personal statement without details of a job. Given she's 18, I think she should definitely have a part-time job.

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:50

I believe that would come back to myself but not to that extent. Wouldn't be paying for her holidays except for our 1 annual holiday, I won't be paying for driving lessons, phones etc that would be down to her to figure out. I would pay for food, clothes, a £10 top up per month and the odd £10/£20 when she's helping around the house

OP posts:
Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:51

I don't want her quitting the job I want her to have that independence and that it will look good on university applications. But I'm just worried she won't be able to keep up with college work as I know university is her dream

OP posts:
EduCated · 05/09/2017 19:53

I agree with having a job, but 20 hours is quite a lot.

Obviously there are people who do it, but unless the job is the only thing keeping food on the table, cutting down hours, or finding a job with less hours, sounds sensible.

Justmuddlingalong · 05/09/2017 19:53

What caused her to drop out from college in her 1st year there?

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:56

Her first year she was at sixth form and was juggling depression, anxiety and bulimia with her education which she wasn't finding easy at all and I couldn't argue with, I was proud of her for putting her health above and coming back to education and trying to get into uni

OP posts:
Ttbb · 05/09/2017 19:57

She's unlikely to do well if she is working so much. What are the grade requirements for her uni course?

Peppapogstillonaloop · 05/09/2017 19:57

20 hours is way too much unless she desperately needs the money. I would be suggesting she reduce her hours or find something more suitable. A part time job is great for lots of things but that many hours with a full oncourse is going to be detrimental to her study.

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 19:58

I think she's also worried about how to approach this with her boss and that she's wishing she'd gone somewhere not as busy or as hard as fast food

OP posts:
Justmuddlingalong · 05/09/2017 19:59

In that case, cutting her hours seems like a good idea. She's been through a lot and is still aiming high. Good on her!

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 20:00

Her grade requirements are as UCAS points, 128-136 UCAS points

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Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 20:01

her minimum hours she can do are 16 as that's the shortest contract offered. Do you think that'll make much difference or is she better off looking elsewhere?

OP posts:
AJPTaylor · 05/09/2017 20:05

Fast food is a tough world... managers are often a bit brutal pay is poor and no tips. And a whole load of shit from customers.
Let her leave.. it will make chuff all difference to uni applications. All shops are gearing up for xmas staff. She could probablt get 10hrs in boots or marks to take her up to new year. Then she can reassess. I have 3 dds that have made it to grown up jobs. All had a go at fast food and jacked it in quickly
Listen to her.

MrsJayy · 05/09/2017 20:05

I think 20 is to much for her especially if she has anxiety and her ED it could tip her back over I know she has signed a contract which is a bit meh because you want her to be committed Say toher to keep there for a few more weeks Christmas jobs will be coming up.or ask for reduced hours

AJPTaylor · 05/09/2017 20:06

And dont worry about her manager. They are used to it

Original poster
flyingtnx · 05/09/2017 20:09

Thank you everyone I really appreciate it. Going to have a chat when she's home from college tomorrow as she wants to discuss it with her college teachers too. I think she'd prefer it elsewhere especially as she's not comfortable with the male to female ratio there. A lot more males!! I know she just wants to grow up and make her own money but I just don't think this is the best job for her

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Ttbb · 05/09/2017 20:10

If it doesn't matter how well she does then it shouldn't be a problem then (unlessshe has really struggled in the past)

OhTheRoses · 05/09/2017 20:10

If she's serious about uni the job needs to come first. I don't agree at all with the person who says a part-time job is essential for uni applications. The personal statement and grades are key, ie, depth of intellect.

My DS has just graduated from Oxford and dd has just achieved 3* and grade 8 instrument. They would not have achieved that working 20 hours per week.

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