Nearly 18 yr old....curfew or no curfew?

[user1491979711]

My nearly 18 yr old thinks it is not necessary to state a time when he needs to be home. We are not arguing about this but rather discussing it. I am uncomfortable with not stating a time ( a rough time) when he needs to be home and wondered what others thought??
He has recently , since A levels, been out with friends/g/f etc until 4am. I don't mind mind on the odd occasion but weekend to weekend?? Umm, I'm uneasy. Your thoughts pls....am I being reasonable??

No curfew for an 18 year old. Expected to be kept informed if staying out or coming home though.

No curfew - if he is going away to uni, he will be out til all hours anyway come September. I agree with chasing that he should text you to say if he is not coming home for dinner and/or staying out all night - that's just basic politeness.

My 17yo has no curfew

I just need to know if they are staying out or not

No curfew, a text is always nice though if not coming home etc.

I would expect people to be back in my home before I lock the door! I would impose a curfew!

What they all said ^^

I still have to remind mine sometimes that they need to let me know if they are staying out, just to stop me worrying about them.

No curfew. But certainky a text telling you whether he's comin home or not and roughly where he is

No curfew.

However i did like to be kept informed of approx eta.

DS is now at uni so u have e no idea of his whereabouts. It's much easier

Graceflorrick So that means everyone has to be in just because you are? Do you have children in their late teens?

Thanks for all your help. Need to re think.Funny coz I have 2 elder boys who live away (21 & 23). I have no idea whatsoever what time theycome in or where they go etc. For me its stressful coz it's under my nose. He's a good kid though, very infact,he appreciates his freedom so its easier to give it to him.My parents didnt allow me such freedom so ai think thats why I am struggling. Thx again everyone ☺

I'd have been horrified if my parents had tried to give me a curfew at that age.

A text to know what time ish I'd be back, fine, but at that age they're young adults and are entitled to that freedom and responsibility of controlling their own comings and goings.

I'm saying this with very clear memories of being that age and my mum struggling to let me fledge! I'm also saying it as a mum with a young-teen daughter who will obviously be locked in her room til she's 30 😂

No, I have teenies so plenty of time to review my position

☺☺☺

Its me again undet a new user name, needed to get rid of all those numbers!! He also has T1 D ( type 1 diabetes) think that makes me a bit more protective too!!

No teens but once I started sixth form (so from 16.5) the rule was that I could come and go as I liked - but if I hadn't text by 11pm with intended plan (i.e. staying out/home by 3am) then the deadlock went down and woe betide me if I had to wake my dad to get let in

I also had to present, awake, clean and tidy, by the time my grandparents arrived for Sunday lunch the next day

My dd was so programmed to text me her plans that she still absent mindedly did it every now and again when she went away to university 400 miles away. I loved it

bertrand, I'm definitely using 'absentmindedly' when I mean 'drunkenly'

Agree with everyone else - no curfew, but it is courteous to let me know plans.

Agree with all the above, at nearly 18 a rough idea of whereabouts is enough, but also some consideration for other family members. If you are coming in at 4am please try and do it quietly. If I am expecting you home for a meal and your plans change please let me know. These are the kind of things my teens tend to to forget sometimes!

As everyone else seems to be posting, no curfew, but you need to know what his plans are and he needs to come in quietly.

My mother had a 10.00 p.m. curfew for me when I was 23 when I was home from university. This was one reason why I went to a university at the other end of the country and never told her anything about my social life there.

10pm curfew at 23

No curfew, a rough idea would be nice though

No curfew from 17 but its courteous to text whereabouts and timings at any age when you live with someone.

My mate had a 11.30pm weekend curfew at 18 and was so embarrassed.