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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

DD15 wants to go on the pill

74 replies

lookatmenow · 18/04/2017 12:54

DD is 15yrs old, year 10 doesn't have a boyfriend (that i know of), has spates of going out after school one week then the next always in on netflix or friends are at house.

She has asked about going on the pill for help with her periods. They cause her discomfort but nothing a couple of paracetamols can't deal with. She says she has heavy periods but again, only for a day or two then normal to light flow.

I'm reluctant to put her on the pill for these reasons but also don't want to risk saying no and wait if she has other reasons (sexual activity) which she isn't telling me.

i've spoken with her about my concerns above but if she's having or thinking about sex she's not going to tell me (at this time) so should i go ahead and book the doctors appointment?

OP posts:

PerspicaciaTick · 18/04/2017 13:57

If she wants a tattoo which is as gorgeous as the design promises to be, then she needs to get it done by a really good tattooist. And really good tattooists won't put their careers on the line by tattooing someone under 18yo.

If she wants the job done right, she needs to wait.

Crapuccino · 18/04/2017 14:09

Tick gets the random reply of the day award.

PerspicaciaTick · 18/04/2017 14:15

Well, it was in response to the OP saying that next battle was over a tattoo...so at least vaguely connected in aiming to get her DD to delay the decision for a few years.

Crapuccino · 18/04/2017 14:18

I shall now award myself the not reading properly reply of the day award.

PerspicaciaTick · 18/04/2017 14:21

Bringmesunshite · 18/04/2017 14:28

Well done, op.

It's a shame that a girl needing help with debilitating periods has to "go on The Pill" to deal with it. Speaking from experience of a pal some 35 years ago.

I know who are anxious about the life choices your dd might make now that she has access to contraceptives. But she's just made a great choice- talking to you- and you have listened to her. Even better.

Neverknowing · 18/04/2017 14:30

This was my excuse to my mum when I was having sex, better than getting pregnant. I dont see why you wouldn't!!

MrsJayy · 18/04/2017 14:36

Some guy when Dds were both in 5/6th year so 16/17 was mobile and tattoing kids, there was some horrific tattoos bad spelling upside down bows and scaryily bad portraits. Sooo i said to mine if you want one wait until you are 18 and i will gladly put some money towards it,

Original poster

lookatmenow · 18/04/2017 14:40

thanks all, you have made me smile and think which is always a bonus.

neverknowing it was my excuse too and i think that's why i was unsure but after the great advice above - whatever reason she's giving me, she's talking to me and not keeping it hidden

OP posts:

Original poster

lookatmenow · 18/04/2017 14:46

we watch Tattoo Fixers all the time and laugh at some of the home kit ones!!!

She'll wait i think, her dad has tattoo sleeves (which are beautifully) and we've always talked about them and how some tattoo designs are just a fashion etc and she needs to pick carefully something that will be on her skin for life

OP posts:

Aspiringcatlady · 18/04/2017 14:47

I went on the pill at 15, although I was sexually active, the main reasons was because I suffer from PCOS and the pill helped my periods massively. I went to the doctors without telling my mum because I was embarrassed about what she would say/think. Be grateful that your daughter is A) willing to confide in you And B) doing what she thinks is right for her body. And on the plus side, if she is having sex, which doesn't seem likely, she is protected against pregnancy! Seems like a very sensible young lady to me!

Original poster

lookatmenow · 18/04/2017 14:50

I'm starting to believe that she is Aspiringcatlady :)

OP posts:

glitterglitters · 18/04/2017 14:51

My dm put me on the pill at 13 because of my horrendous periods. I had no other intentions at all. It really helped as well.

kingscrossnoodle · 18/04/2017 20:13

Oh I would be thoroughly delighted if my 15yo wanted to go on the pill. I'm not sure why it would ever be a problem tbh.

notquiteruralbliss · 22/04/2017 19:24

One of my DDs went on the pill st 14 (wanted to control periods). IIRC she took her father to the doctors appointment.

cestlavielife · 22/04/2017 19:28

Gp might suggest mefanemic acid first to try. Dd 16 is on it it helps a lot
Have dd Go with open mind discuss options with gp

LilacMarin19 · 28/04/2017 02:33

My Grandparents put me on the pill aged 14 after they caught me having sex So, I think if she is asking... She is ready

VestalVirgin · 30/04/2017 20:58

As people pointed out, the pill has side effects and risks. One should always see a good gynecologist to find out whether there's an underlying issue to the heavy and painful periods rather than just getting the pill prescribed.

user1496240576 · 31/05/2017 15:54

Personally going on the pill may help her with periods and also if she does have sex at least you will know she is protected. If she's going to have sex she will and no one but her can change that.

Veryhungrycaterpillar84 · 31/05/2017 16:09

Health professional here. Legally she can choose to go on the pill with or without your permission at age 15. It would be better for her to have your support and also for you to keep the channels of communication open with her. At least then you will know what's going on in her life rather than her clamming up and feeling like she can't trust or be open with you.

The pill is very good at regulating periods and obviously would prevent unwanted pregnancy.

There are alternatives to the pill for heavy/painful periods such as Mefenamic acid or tranexamic acid which she might prefer to try as they don't have hormones in.

If you do think that she is planning to become sexually active it might be worth having a bit of a chat about condoms, STI prevention, where the sexual health clinic is and consent etc. Being so open and supportive will hopefully mean that she trusts you to tell you what's going on in future.

Good luck

beccii161016 · 01/06/2017 08:41

Let her go on the pill. I told my mom I wanted to go on this pill for this exact same reason and it was true. However, not too long after I began a 4 and a half year relationship and had intercourse with him at 15, on the pill. My mom wasn't happy about the situation really and I can imagine you're not! I'm not saying this is the reason for your DD but if she wants to become sexually active then she will do it whether you allow her to go on the pill or not and wouldn't you rather her be protected in some way?
Maybe speak to her about the importance of condoms though as she need to be aware that the pill gives no protection from STI's.

Hopefully it is just for her periods but speaking from experience, there's probably more to it to be honest.

NotCitrus · 01/06/2017 09:41

Hopefully she will get meds that will help with periods now, whether mefenemic acid (ponstan), tranexemic acid, or pill.
And that the GP will treat her with respect - I remember going to one for a repeat pill prescription and the cow telling me if I didn't admit to her I was planning sex, I'd have to pay for it.I wasn't and didn't and told her I'd pay (a lot of money for a 17yo).
Luckily the pharmacist refused to take money on the grounds the meds were in the non-chargeable contraceptives category no matter why I might be taking them. He very kindly advised I read the booklet in case I might make use of the 'contraceptive function' in future!

JaneEyre70 · 01/06/2017 09:48

Both of my youngest DDs went on the pill at 15 and 13 respectively for skin and painful periods. We think my youngest has endometriosis so her periods are incredibly painful for her. They now have both progressed onto the implant which I must admit to feeling happier about, I was worried about the side effects/risks.
I found it all very overwhelming OP when my 1st reached 14/15, it's all new and you're trying to find the balance between still parenting them and letting them make their own decisions. They really should come with instruction manuals . It sounds like you've reached a good level of communication with your DD and that's something really special.

JustDanceAddict · 01/06/2017 10:30

I'd be more concerned with side-effects and make sure she tells you/GP if she has any bad effects - depression, excessive crying - which can happen.

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