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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Teenager faking my signature

43 replies

Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 17:40

My ds (17) has faked my signature to get out of pe at school (twice). It is the sort of thing a lot of us probably did as kids but should I just have the "this is not ok" conversation or take some sort of action as a consequence. One half of me says let it go, it is fairly normal behaviour, the other half says there needs to be some consequence for fraudulent behaviour. Just as background information: ds has been difficult of late - verbally abusive, ignoring basic manners, non-cooperation.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/10/2015 17:45

I have to ask first-why is he doing PE at 17? Is he doing Sports at A Level?

Original poster
Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 17:49

We live in Germany and pe is compulsory in the sixth form here

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/10/2015 17:53

Ah right, just wondered if he was trying to get out of a subject he had chosen to do (as would be the case here in UK).

I would certainly advise the school, and tell them that he will be doing PE from now on.

Not sure about consequences, was it a particular sport he hates?

Original poster
Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 17:56

No. It was badminton, which he quite likes but he just couldn't be bothered to stick around for it. Told me had a headache but was out on his bike 30 minutes later to go out socialising.

OP posts:
Original poster
Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 17:59

The fake headache was the second time. Thinking back, he told me the first time that pe had been cancelled as the teacher was not there. Don't really want him to think he can get away with this.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/10/2015 18:00

I think I would try and have a conversation along the 'this is not ok' lines. Forging someone's signature really isn't.

I quite like the idea of compulsory PE in 6th Form though.

lighteningirl · 06/10/2015 18:03

Just because we all did it doesn't make it ok I would come down like a ton of bricks while secretly rolling my eyes and thinking oh well. If you let him think this is ok you are doing him a serious disservice forging a signature and lying are not acceptable behaviours.

IHaveBrilloHair · 06/10/2015 18:06

I opened this thread wondering if it was to get out of PE!
Tbh, I'd empathise the first time, PE is shit, but make it clear that forging my signature is not on and if there's a next time it'll be ton of bricks.

VulcanWoman · 06/10/2015 18:11

Are you sure there's nothing more to it. I used to skip PE because I didn't like getting changed/showered in front of others, I had a bad skin and was embarrassed, didn't want to tell my Mum either.

Original poster
Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 18:14

Quite sure there is no shyness behind it. He is an incredibly confident teen and they all just go home to shower as pe is the last lesson of the day.

OP posts:
Original poster
Juliehermann · 06/10/2015 22:52

Thanks for your answers. Out of interest, those of you who would go down the ton of bricks route - what form do your personal ton of bricks take? Why do 17 year olds have to be so difficult - are they just making it easier to live without them when they move out?

OP posts:
VulcanWoman · 07/10/2015 06:17

Yes, I think you're right, easier to live with when they move out!
My Son is of similar age, we're in the UK though so no more PE.
Maybe it will be enough that he knows you've found out he's been lying, if not maybe say you'll have to phone his Teacher up to check he's attending the class, I'm sure that will do the trick. He's nearly 18 so I'd pretty much leave him to it but without involving a forged signature. Wink

SoupDragon · 07/10/2015 06:27

Why do 17 year olds have to be so difficult

I always think that a wild animal teenager would have been thrown out of the pack long before they become difficult :)

My personal Ton of Bricks is usually to change the wifi password for a while. I would focus on needing to trust them and a forged signature means they can't be trusted.

Rainuntilseptember · 07/10/2015 06:30

In Scotland PE is often part of the core curriculum up until sixth form. Actually even when I was at school elsewhere in UK we had PE the whole way through school.
If he is doing it to avoid an activity he actually likes out of sheer laziness I'd be very pissed off. Plus it creates a bad impression of home when they can't trust a letter from you any more.

Bunbaker · 07/10/2015 06:34

Isn't PE compulsory in 6th form in England any more? It was when I was at school.

SoupDragon · 07/10/2015 06:34

I think DS is still doing compulsory PE in 6th form (England but independent school). He is definitely still required to do games.

cathpip · 07/10/2015 06:35

My friends daughter did this, she's only 14 though. Her mum emailed the head of year and the pe teacher stating that her daughter had faked her signature, there is nothing wrong with her daughters health and she is carrying no injury, she is just bone idle, and if ever any note appeared again to excuse her from any lesson just ignore it completely and if her daughter ever did need to be excused from something she would phone in personally. Then she left the email open on the computer for her daughter to find :). Friends daughter does have sn and is renowned for pulling stunts like this, she was not overly happy when she realised that pe was back on the curriculum for her, needless to say no other punishment was necessary as they have just started cross country :)

plurplelello · 07/10/2015 06:37

this isnt much help but when my brother was at school, he apparenrly used to regularly sign letters from our mother to get out of PE ( not sure why as he is very fit and sporty now ). One time he broke his arm outside of school and when she sent a note in they queried it because her real signature "was so different from the normal one", which is how she found out he'd been doing it.

He turned out fine, eventually.

Singsongsungagain · 07/10/2015 06:43

To my shame I have to say I did this lots! I hated PE with a passion. I seem to have survived mind you- I am not a fugitive law breaker or anything.
Actually I suspect my mum knew that I did it but she was ok about it as she had also hated PE at school. I had lots of hobbies and interests and always worked hard at school, getting good reports/grades. I just hated PE!

SoupDragon · 07/10/2015 07:16

I used to forge signatures for people in their homework planners.

I was secretly pleased when I discovered a whole page in DS1s planner where he had been practising my signature. Needless to say I didn't tell him that :)

Zinkies · 07/10/2015 09:44

If you object to him imitating your signature, why don't you just write some notes for him saying that he's ill yourself?

SoupDragon · 07/10/2015 09:46

why don't you just write some notes for him saying that he's ill yourself?

Perhaps because he isn't...?

Zinkies · 07/10/2015 09:48

What's that got to do with anything?

SconeForAStroll · 07/10/2015 09:49

I was so excellent at forging my mum's signature that she used to get me to write and sign cheques for her when she was busy.

Unluckily for DD my signature is all swoopy and legible and v.difficult to forge. She has had a go though!

I don't think I would get too annoyed, he is 17 after all. But I would want to know when he wanted to skip PE because I am nosy

SoupDragon · 07/10/2015 09:51

What's that got to do with anything?

Everything.