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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

15 year old DS put topless pics of him and his GF on Snapchat

38 replies

GertyD · 31/03/2014 16:18

But in the My Story bit, so any of his friend list can see. Then the picture got uploaded by someone to Facebook who is refusing to remove it and now it has 150 comments in it all laughing at him, and promising to re-upload it if it gets deleted.
The picture shows just their naked top halves, her boobs and has been edited so it reads 'Aww yessss' across itConfused
Angry is not the word! How could he be so fucking stupid?! He says she pushed him to do it.
The person who posted it has the profile set to public so everyone can see/comment and when I asked her to take it down, I got a load of abuse. I don't know who this girl is.
I have messages DS's girlfriends mum so she knows, but she hadn't responded.
WTF do I do???
How do I punish him?
Facebook say it doesn't breach it's terms so will not remove it - even though it is a picture of two half naked 15 year olds, showing the girls tits completely!
Help!
I have removed his TV/X Box/Laptop and when I get home, I will take his iPhone. I have also changed his FB password. Is this even the right way to go?Sad

OP posts:
fuckwitteryhasform · 31/03/2014 16:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
GertyD · 31/03/2014 16:25

I told the girl posting it that I would do that. Cue loads of abuse. I can't believe it. I am so ashamed. Will the police take it seriously?

OP posts:
PopOfTheTops · 31/03/2014 16:25

Oh g of, what a. Nightmare.

I agree priority is to get the photo removed.

I know this will be controversial, but will the fact that it happened be lesson learnt enough? Although I guess he should be punished for putting her pic u p as well.

Hope you get it sorted.

specialsubject · 31/03/2014 17:41

well, that's a lesson learned!!

yes, report to FB as they are minors so that should get it removed. And you remove all his internet toys until he grows up. He is far too irresponsible for all this.

InspirationFailed · 31/03/2014 17:44

I reported a photo similar to this to Facebook and they replied saying that it didn't breach their rules, so I replied to them again asking why they had rules that allowed indecent photos of minors and they took it straight down. It might be worth reporting it again.

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 31/03/2014 17:49

Ashamed? What of? I get angry or exasperated to extreme but shame....?

Til you said that I was agreeing with how you handled it. It's stupid, but retrievable / could be worse. Just scare him shitless -future employers etc..

I wouldn't think less of you as a family. Is that what worried you...?

LackaDAISYcal · 31/03/2014 17:56

pity you can't edit it to include a baby being fed; they would soon get rid of it then! They should act when you say that they are minors.
I would say let this be a lesson to them both; they were stupid so they have to face the consequences.

PiratePanda · 31/03/2014 18:04

It's an indecent photograph of minors; try facebook again and then tell the police.

Original poster
GertyD · 31/03/2014 18:52

I have reported it several times, and replied that it is of minors but they won't budge. I called police who say they will call back. They didn't sound too keen though.

I am ashamed of him because he put a picture up of his girlfriends boobs. I thought he knew better than that.

OP posts:
Minnieisthedevilmouse · 31/03/2014 18:59

Ah ok. That makes sense. I thought she posted and he was just in it.

Tomorrow is another day. Hope it all works out ok x

dexter73 · 31/03/2014 19:11

Maybe you could tell the school? My dd's school has a police officer who comes over to bollock students for this sort of thing.

fuckwitteryhasform · 31/03/2014 20:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
GertyD · 01/04/2014 06:27

I am not sure who girl who posted the picture, she is a friend of a friend and none of them are at the same school. I don't know what school she would go to. She has now started posting pics of me with the word 'MILF' underneathConfused. That is all getting a good laugh. Idiot. My old profile pictures. I have blocked her now.

We'll see how today goes Hmm

DS is very sorry now though.

OP posts:
Original poster
GertyD · 01/04/2014 06:28

Oh the abuse I got was that I was a shit parent as I had a son who would do this.

OP posts:
Parsnipcake · 01/04/2014 06:55

You need to get school on board, they can bring the police in- distributing indecent pictures of a minor is a criminal offence, but it's so common. It's much better done via school than as a parent though.

fuckwitteryhasform · 01/04/2014 07:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dexter73 · 01/04/2014 08:35

Print out what has been posted for evidence in case it gets deleted.

Parsnipcake · 01/04/2014 09:54

Don't print it - that in itself could be a criminal offence. It would be much better for the police to do it. We had a similar case locally and any texting or printing led to police involvement. You really don't want, or your son to get a caution for making indecent images - the parent involved in our case only narrowly avoided this even though they were just trying to get evidence.

dexter73 · 01/04/2014 10:39

That conflicts with what the schools police officer told us at a meeting about internet bullying. We were told to get print outs for evidence in case it got deleted. Seems like they don't have a consistent policy.

differentnameforthis · 01/04/2014 12:36

So he took the picture, put it on fb & this girl (not his gf) reposted it.

Surely that is distribution of pornographic material of a minor/child. Which is a police matter.

Yes, you need it removed, but if you are considering going to the police, your ds & his gf will also be in trouble.

And you need to talk to your ds about the consequences of such behaviour.

Ashamed? What of? I get angry or exasperated to extreme but shame....? That she hasn't advised her son that uploading naked images of a child is illegal?

differentnameforthis · 01/04/2014 12:36

And op, you need to get your profile pictures made private. Seriously, how do people upload pictures & allow the whole of the www to see them!!

differentnameforthis · 01/04/2014 12:38

We were told to get print outs for evidence in case it got deleted

usually a good idea, if it is words. But you cannot print indecent pictures of a minor, you are putting yourself in line for all sorts of issues.

dexter73 · 01/04/2014 13:11

Well yes, I meant print out the words and not the photos.
This happens a lot at schools. When it happened to a friend of my dd, all the boys who had sent each other the picture had their phones confiscated by the police for a couple of weeks and were read the riot act, but it didn't go any further than that.

dozily · 01/04/2014 13:17

differentnameforthis, you can't make your current profile picture private.

You can make past profile pictures private admittedly (I do), but I guess since they've all been public once, many people don't see that point.

Iammelting · 01/04/2014 13:18

differentnameforthis you can't make profile photos ( or cover pics) private, they are 'owned' by FB & always set to public.