Pocket Money

[tan3517]

My son is 14 how much pocket money would you advise me to give him on return of chores. I dont want to go over the top but I also want it to be worth while. I'm talking clearing dinner table, putting rubbish out, making and changing his bed?

Hi, so you just give him this each month. Does he get chores to do? Sorry so new to this and I want to get it right. :)

I give dd 14 £20 a month. She doesn't do chores as such but is expected to keep her room tidy and not leave mess round the house. I buy her clothes on top, but anything else - cinema, going into town etc, or if she wants clothes like Jack Wills stuff, comes out of her pocket money.
DD 18 started getting £50 per month when she was 14-15 and that was to pay for absolutely everything she wanted, and I made it clear that the amount would not go up with inflation!!! She now has a part-time job i the local pub.

Btw I prefer not to link the money to chores, but have the option to withdraw some of it at my discretion - mess left around, late to school, bad behaviour etc

I wouldn't link pocket money to day to day chores, but would pay extra for one off jobs like working all day in the garden helping DH or loading a skip.....They would have to do it though not just be there!
Taking turns washing up and changing their bed sheet is something they just have to do.

My dd gets £3.50 per week and is expected to keep her room tidy and is on a rota with dd2 and ds for empty/loading dishwasher/clearing table. If she wants more she can do other jobs, this week for example she hoovered downstairs and got 2.50.

DD is 16, She gets 40 pounds a month .. She is expected to keep her own room tidy and just generally help out if needed.. Out of this she needs to buy all her own stuff apart from essential things.

I always believe that they need to learn how to balance there money, so when the allowance is gone and she wants something, tough luck she will wait till the following month :)

My DS 13 and DD 11 get £4 per week provided they do music practice, homework and tidy their own rooms, put clean clothes away etc

They lose some or all if not

They can also get more for other jobs to help me....

That's on top of phones - £15 per month

So far it's worked with DD - she generally gets more than £5 per week but DS hasn't got his act together so gets £2 ish - mostly cos his room is a tip and his guitar doesn't come out of its bag between lessons

Excellant thank you for all your replies thats a great help, keep them all coming I will have to think about this one. On the whole most of you dont like linking this to chores. Thank you :)

My two (12 & 15) get a tenner when they tidy their rooms, once a week. Except the 15yr old almost never does it so she's perpetually skint.

DDs 1 & 2 who are 18 and 17 get £60/month which they both supplement with outside jobs.

DS is 15 and he gets £40/month. Not linked to chores, but he is expected (as they all are) to keep his shit pit relatively neat and tidy.

So everybodies advice is to give him money but not to link it to any chores? I feel Im a bit late with this but want to get it sorted asap because we are not a cash machine! as you will all agree! Hmm

Another thing, I was going to link the pocket money to jobs but after all your advice I may not. Therefore how do you get yours to do these mundane jobs without having a screaming match, because thats our problem at the moment. (Well mine and my DS) I havent done this before so I may introduce it weekly to begin with and then bring on monthly?? Your thoughts please? :)

?? Can you please give me your thoughts :)

At 14 I would guess around £5 per week with more for chores .....

clearing table and making own bed are both expected of mine for their basic pocket money but putting rubbish out would be say 20p a time....

Mine have a list of most jobs that need to be done during the week stuck on the fridge, and they're priced between 20p and £1 depending on how much effort is involved (ranging from unloading dishwasher, sorting washing to helping put the shopping away, cleaning bathroom, mowing lawn, washing car - mostly jobs that I would love not to have to do)

If they do one of the jobs, their Initial goes on the sheet and they get paid that extra amount in the next lot of pocket money (I pay out monthly so they have to manage their money, but get a larger amount in one go if they want to get something bigger as if I gave pocket money weekly it would all go on sweets )

I also keep a note of who hasn't done music practice, tidied room etc so I know how much pocket money to deduct from their basic amount too...

Since I started this my DD's music practice has increased from only when nagged to 5 times per week on each instrument, and she is nearly house trained too but I am still working on DS!

I don't link pocket money to chores, DCs 14&13 get £20 a month and we pay for their mobile phone contracts £19 per month

They have a rota for dishwasher, bathroom and hovering and have helped out in the house since they were 10, I work f/t so they have no choice, everyone has to pitch in.

Thank you I have wanted to start this for a while but its been an issue between my husband and I. My issue is my DS lol

I give my dd the child benefit (so £80 a month) and it is linked to chores. She does about 4 hours chores per week, so equates to about minimum wage. She has just got a PT job but is just one shift a week at the moemnt, I am quite happy aboit that as I would prefer she doesn't get too many hours work until she completes her GCSEs.

She has to clean the bathroom every day, hoover and mop the whole house every other day, dust and polish the sitting room every other day, cook once a week and clean both cars inside and out every weekend.

It works very well for us.

If it was me, I would sit down with him and have a chat laying out a deal along the lines of you want to give him an allowance/pocket money but he has to show that he can be responsible too. Don't list them as chores per se, simply say that out of respect for you, you would appreciate the little things like keeping his room tidy, helping out when needed, not a list of 'you will do this and then we'll pay you'.

So, for example, when you're cooking supper and he's slobbing in front of the television/PS3 or whatever, say that supper will be ready shortly and could he quickly lay the table. Not every single night, perhaps 3 or 4. Likewise with the bins - everyone can take them out, sometimes you, sometimes him etc.

The bedrooms with me are non negotiable with my older children. Since they started school the deal has always been beds made, rooms generally tidy and pocket money will be paid. Now that they are much bigger I have relaxed the tidy stuff as, frankly, the shit pits are theirs and I rarely enter them. If they lose things in there it's tough shit as I am not going to look for their bits and bobs because they have kept their pits a mess

MY youngest is only 3, but she has just started 'making' her bed. It's obviously not perfect, but she's getting the hang of it. She likes to get a magazine at the weekend, but she knows that if I have to clear up her crap at the end of each day she will NOT get one. She's missed out only a couple of times, so now when I go and run her bath she runs around like a wild thing shoving her stuff in boxes and at least making an attempt to tidy. Sometimes she does a good job, sometimes she doesn't, but the effort is there.

I don't think I should have to pay my DCs for basic things like keeping the house tidy, just explain what they are expected to do,after all when they move out, no one will be paying them to keep their flat tidy!!
They do sometimes help out with admin for my job and I pay them £5 per hour for that
It's good for them to have basic chores in the house they are responsible for, I think it teaches them responsibility.

I've definitely given up on the bedrooms as well, now they get themselves up in the morning, bring their washing down(otherwise it doesn't get washed) and put clean laundry away, I never go in their rooms, I just shut the door on the mess (esp. DS, I don't know how he even gets into bed!)

I think you can link it to certain jobs in that you decide what you think the basic chores he should do are. As I said earlier we have a dishwasher loading/emptying rota, tidy rooms & I forgot putting clothes away - if they do this they get their money. I think rather than telling him that he's not doing enough around the house and has got to pull his socks up etc you'd be better off saying that youve decided that now he's older he should have his own money. Most teens love money, so say that you want him to learn how to budget, he's going to get x amount and that has to cover his expenses and be clear about what those are. Then you say obviously we expect you to contribute in return and you are expected to do xy&z in return for the money. If he says, no thanks I like the existing system then you say no, that isn't an option this is the way it's going to be in future.

Hmm, yes I think it's how you word it. I don't explicityly say to dd 'you do x and I will pay you y', just that the work she does is part of her contribution to the household. We all live there, and we all have our responsibilities. It makes it easier for us all really.

I don't give a monkeys about her bedroom. If shhe wants to live like a slob so be it, as long as there are no plates or cups there. She knows though that she needs to tidy her stuff up in the rest of the house. I am very clean and tody and clutter-free, and I think she hates it, I think her bedroom is her own space so I don't dictate how she keeps it.

OMG it has so helped me with this thread. You have all made me realise that I have almost been responsible for my DS behavour. I need to change a few things. Please keep them coming ladies :)