totally lost it today with vile dd 13

[Stripey99]

last year dd started periods (june) and her hormones created some pretty dramatic moods swings. Things got so bad we went to the doctors as she was starting to throw things at me, swear at me, belittle me, told me to F* off.

The doctor wanted to refer us for family counsilling but after being assessed, they decided we didnt warrant as our sitution wasnt bad enough!

After xmas things completely calmed down and thought maybe it was just a phase. But, this week it has started all over again. I asked her to do something and she just exploded. Threw her boots at me, nearly smashing a mirror, screamed she hated me, that i was a failure, laughed at me when i tried to tell her off.

After nearly half an hour of insults and door slamming, sniggers and swearing from her i lost it completely and shouted really loudly BEHAVE YOURSELF and smacked her arse.

Its not my ideal way of dealing with things and now feel like the failure she sees me as because i lost it. :( :(

fb is evil

I remember Custy talking about the cut plugs before, it's somewhere on MN why she did it (heehee). Does it count as criminal damage if the objects he owned were things the parents paid for?

There was the case of somebody like a dinner lady losing her job because her teen... 12 or 15? pressed charges for assault after being slapped once (Crazy World We Live In).

The only time my mother ever smacked me was when I was a teen & said something she found vile (not name-calling or shouting, I know I said it quite calmly, I think it was an opinion she found offensive, but I don't recall about what).

thanks martini. i still feel like shit for smacking her and she says she didnt mean the things she said. (blub!)

we went shopping again today and had a lovely time.

will be releived when half term over tho!

I feel your pain. Have DD13...vile. Police involved, she's smashed phones,mirrors,kitchen. I've just been to doctors for help for me...got nothing . Have been told this behaviour passes by the time they reach 16/17. Dont know if either of us will last til then.

Sharon, I was told it goes in 6 month cycles, truth is, I don't think it follows any time scale! I'm beginning to see some improvement since dd went on the pill/ got arrested again...... Have no idea which it was, but I see a small change

I have also given her her own room so she doesn't have to share with her sister....... I now have no bedroom! Sleep on the sofa bed! But she seems grateful

Do you not think that this behaviour is a bit extreme to be hormones? I have four kids and the only one that behaved in that way was drinking and doing drugs? My eldest 3 are 21, 19 and 15. None of them ever behaved that way apart from one and it was not hormones.

We all have different levels of PMT. SOme of us suffer more than others. I think it's a combo of hormones/typical teenage behaviour/peer pressure/ influence of TV/ the weather and any other excuse...
Can you tell that I am at a loss as to fathom it out ??

Also luck of the draw as to what type of child you've been given...Mine is certainly not the fluffy sweet child that I ordered.

IloveTiff....glad things are looking up x

PS have spare room if you need it x

I wouldn't feel bad about smacking her. I quite liked the cold water one and cutting plugs off. i think this generation of parents put up with so much crap from their offspring including myself and perhaps a bit of retalliation is not a bad thing. My mum and dad didn't lose any sleep if they slapped us so why do we feel so bad if we do it to our own kids. I think it does make you feel better sometimes.

I think the moods are to do with PMS. I know i am like it myself and have been hollering at my kids today because i think they are lazy and selfish.