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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

DD swore at me.

57 replies

funnyperson · 24/01/2011 19:13

What would others do?

DD (age 17) got a B in one of her mock exams and I said 'oh dear' so she swore at me and put the phone down. Now I realise I should have said 'its only a mock' or similar and in this instance her reaction is understandable, but even so I'm a bit fed up with the swearing which is getting to be a habit. She de-friended me from facebook after I asked her to delete a swear word from her wall.

I am not prepared to tolerate swearing in my presence really so I would like to know how other parents of older teens deal with this.

What I propose to do is let her know I think it unacceptable and ask for an apology when she next speaks to me. And I shan't ring her back. Is this very overbearing?

OP posts:
Redsrule · 05/02/2011 22:47

Good point Mad, blame the wine and the rather dodgy keyboard! Only went to Oxford and read English!!!!!

lazymumofteenagesons · 06/02/2011 16:56

The 'Oh dear' to a B in a mock is acceptable with a high achieving child. This would be their reaction as well and if you had congratulated her she would have thought you had flipped. But swearing at a parent is not acceptable and she should apologise. Unfortunately both my teens swear, but then so do I! However, there is a difference between using swear words in conversation and swearing at a person. She phoned back and apologised and all's well in the funnyperson household - end of.

atswimtwolengths · 18/02/2011 15:27

My children have never sworn at me, though I know they swear when with their friends. I've never heard them; I just know, because they are normal teenagers.

I don't think you were supportive at all and for that, I think you should apologise to her. I think she would feel very stressed at the thought of phoning you with that result.

Just out of interest, did you ever get anything below an A in school/college?

atswimtwolengths · 18/02/2011 15:28

Actually, OP, the more I think about this, the more I think you should have phoned her with an apology, not mentioning her language at all.

Ormirian · 18/02/2011 15:30

I'd have wanted to swear at you too to be frank! What's with the 'Oh dear'?

pointydog · 18/02/2011 15:37

I think you should phone and explain that you said the wrong thing and you;re sorry about that. Then there's a chance she might apologise to you.

You need to work at a relationship, not carry on with the same old Mum Rules that must be obeyed at all times regardless of the situation.

pointydog · 18/02/2011 15:39

ah, I see she apologised to you very quickly. What a lovely girl.

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