Mother passed out drunk on Christmas Day

[AmpleOlive]

Just a rant as today is tipping me over the edge.

I have my mum over at mine, as has been the case for the past few years. It’s just me and her today, the rest of the family are doing their own thing with their OHs and kids.

Mum has been a functioning alcoholic for as long as I’ve been alive. Like others in her position she has had good and bad days, but lately it’s been getting far worse. And last night she cracked open a bottle of gin and downed half of it. She has been passed out on the sofa since early this morning, waking up briefly at 11am before falling back asleep 30 minutes later. I cooked us a Christmas dinner as we had planned, but I’m the only one eating it.

Merry Christmas 😥

So sorry you’re on your own. That sounds such a sad situation. Alcohol over consumption has robbed so many of so much.

Thinking of you OP.

That's really sad. So sorry op.

That's okay, OP.
Not meaning to be insensitive, but after growing up trapped with an alcoholic father, a broken man,
at least it's not yourself. ❤️

Oh OP that’s heart breaking

I hope she shows some remorse when finally wakes up

This is really unfortunate for you but until she's willing to do something about it it's something you'll have to learn to cope with.

As a daughter of a now deceased alcoholic Mother, you have my full empathy. Awful disease for those who have to live amongst it xx

I'm sorry your Mum did this.
She won't change unless she wants to so maybe it's time to distance yourself.

I'm so sorry 😞 that sounds lonely and upsetting. It's often the case with functional alcoholics that it worsens over time and the damage that your mum has done to herself with her years of drinking will start to show. When she's sobered up, can you have a frank conversation with her - no tiptoeing around the subject but laying your cards on the table? If she's unwilling to address it, you need to start putting boundaries in place to protect yourself - this might include not spending Christmas with her next year. Sending hugs and hope you will find some enjoyment over the Christmas period 💐

No, she doesn't. She never has to have another Christmas with her mother passed out from drink.

Yes, not being around her at Christmas could be a way for her to cope, but only the OP can figure that out as part of the whole "learning how to cope" thing.

It’s was a really crass thing to say to someone in that situation.

I'm sorry you thought so.

Yes it was nasty and bitter

I think so too don’t be so unkind it’s Xmas

OP wasn’t asking for what she should do - she was just wanting us to witness what’s going on for her

I'm sorry you all thought so but you can't help an alcoholic much until they decide to help themselves, you can only help yourself until they do.

The OP may know that - she didn’t need to be told about it

she was looking for empathy

at least your sorry for your insensitivity

I am very sorry indeed.

OP I'm sorry you're going through this, I'm a recovering functional alcoholic myself. I ruined people's lives all around me while I was in the throes of it. It's good to rant on a thread like this but be sure to find a way to look after yourself first because the alcoholic really can't help you, they're lost in it for now, you can only help yourself, be it ranting on threads, etc. I'm sorry I sounded insensitive, part of my recovery is to be radically honest with myself and others. The 'there theres' didn't help me or my loved ones back then, but the truth did.

Ah, that makes sense, @MyRoseRaven.
Can I suggest that until you are further on in your recovery, you perhaps don't offer your 'radical honesty' to those currently dealing with the fallout of loved one’s alcoholism?

Ok then. That's not very kind of you when I was trying to share my experience but I accept it.

Apologies to the OP, I wish you and your mother the best. It's a hard road, take care

That all makes sense now

I thought you might be a survivor of the whole thing as your post sounded bitter

well done you for getting sober (if you have)

I think your story was useful 🥰

I am not drunk at the moment if that's what you're implying. I just speak plainly and openly. It's s not to everyone's taste, but I am willing to accept and apologize when I am wrong. I think we can leave it now, this part of the thread has been done.

No implying drunk

it felt like your first post was a bit lecturing when that wasn’t what was being asked for

Yes I get you all thought I took the wrong approach and I apologized.

I hope someone else will have something else to say to the.OP that will help her and we can move on from what I said.