Gah! I bloody HATE weddings.

[LowLevelWhinging]

I really really hate having to dress formally - I always feel like I look like a sad sack of spuds! I'm short and porky and crappy ankle bones means I can't wear heels - I live in converse usually.

Got to go to a wedding and it's bloody 'black tie'! DP will be in a tux.

Anybody able to advise pleeeeeeeeeze?

I'm 5'2", size 16, apple shaped so always look bloody pregnant. Contrary to received wisdom, I am an apple with crap legs so definitely knee length or lower.

So would a maxi be bad for short and round woman? Or what about a sticky out skirt type shape. I JUST HAVEN"T A CLUE!

ooh, nice wedges! I reckon I need to try some on really don't I?

Mary, what gorgeous frocks! I'm having a good root around the fabrics now. Are they cut for tiny little 1940's shaped women? I note it says they use vintage patterns.

LLW - you can do heels - surely? Maybe not ankle straps if the cankles are problematic, but under a maxi anything is possible - and at 5'2" heels are a must if you are maxi-ing. The trouble with the Coast dress you linked is that it is (although beautiful)more of a full length evening gown than a maxi day dress. You may get away with it, but I'd go for something more day-ish.

Need to be careful that you don't wear an overwhelming pattern though. That blue one was nice, as well.

Fellatio, I reckon I'll give the maxi a miss. Especially as I've got shorter than petite legs so I'd prob have to have stuff altered anyway.

The invite does say black tie dress code

I've worn a small chunkyish heel shoe boot before with no disaster, but I really wobble stupidly on thin/tall heels. My ankles are weak and go over easily. Even in bare feet I'm not great at standing on tip toes - the bones crack!

Mary, what's the quality like on those Get Cutie frocks? Is the fabric very light? I'm just wondering if it hangs well enough for a lumpy bumpy person.

Get some good stout wedges! They are the answer. Very fashionable, flattering, and stable to walk in. Sorry misunderstood about the dress - it is a sort of evening dress/black tie theme then? Later in the day?

How very modern/American!

Ooh! Ooh! Go to the thread called 'Typical - LK Bennett sale' (or somethign - sorry I would do a link but I'm rubbish and they never work). There is a lovely Phase Eight dress, deep indigo, calf length, drapey/fitted empire line, very flattering for apple shapes, reduced in sale. Hang on....

OK, 'advance search' posts from dexter73 on 22nd June and look at her link.

I love Phase Eight, they've done me well in the past but most are sold out!

I'll go off and search dexter...

Fellatio, you are spot on, I have that dress in blue! Very flattering but I wore it to the last wedding we all went to.

Gold star

I'm pitching channel 4 with my new makeover show as we speak...

Oh my god, size 16 is not the end of the world, I'm sure you'll look fine. I love how everyone panics on these threads as though we're dressing someone with three legs or an extra head.

If you want to wear a maxi dress, wear one. Wear something you'll feel comfortable in mainly, not something you'll be tugging down/up all day.

Right, I'm rubbish at this because I don't have the patience for either internet or high street shopping...

However, I LOVE the coast dress, do they do similar with a shorter skirt? The get cutie stuff is really pretty, especially the long strapless dress. The Jigsaw dress is gorgeous too but agree it looks a bit flimsy. Have you tried clever undies? Spanx are supposed to be good.

A friend who is about 5' recently wore a 1950's style dress for her wedding. Y'know, cinched waist, sticky outy calf-length skirt etc. Looked fab, think it would suit you too.

D'you reckon long and fitted would work rather than long and floaty?

Finally, I'd rather poke my eyes out but it might be worth going to one of the big dept stores in town, booking in with a personal shopper and just trying loads of different dresses on in all sorts of styles. I know I always end up with the same style/ length dress because there's one shape that suits. Will make trawling the internet easier if you know what you're looking for.

That's the end of my first and last ever post in style and beauty!

P.S. Am ignorant, does black tie mean the boys have to wear a tux?

P.P.S. you will look glamorous and gorgeous, I will look sweaty and tired

I wonder if you can treat yourself to one of those personal shoppers at a very large Debenhams stores?????

AnyFule, you are so right about the tugging! Good advice. Comfort is worth so much more to me than any amount of fashion points.

Hairy, you make the personal shopper thing sound really attractive!

Would love to go for the cinched in stuff but I'm afraid I would need the kind of clever undies that you have to have your lady in waiting strap you into with her foot on your bum.

I'm going to have to go and actually try stuff on aren't I? pfff

Hairy, we will be in the sweaty and tired corner together

I'm 5' and apple shaped and despite only being size 8 hips have no boobs and a size 12 waist. It's a nighmare, you have my deepest sympathies.

Oh, and yes, I have it on god authority that black tie means tux. But surely they can't expect everyone to be tuxed up? Really?

I can heartily recommend Scala magic undies (get them online from John Lewis) they are very long in the body and come up right under your ribs, and low down on your thigh, so they are more like a corset, so you don't get that unsightly midriff crease or overflow or leg bulge. They have great control but don't cut off your blood supply like other makes!

Black tie = dinner jacket. Which can be white or black. And posh frocks for ladies.

Hmmm, I think you might be right about the tuxes. Shame cos DH just bought a suit for a wedding this weekend, thought it might get another airing.

It probably is fun to do the personal shopper thing. I'm just against shopping in general after spending hours in the Arndale with a toddler this week.

Have you tried Ghost, their stuff & magic undies should suit most people. The whole "machine washable" thing is ACE as well.

I second the personal shopper at a department store, or do you have a friend who is good at this kind of thing who could find a few suggestions online for you to go try on?

Can't help myself now

Bloody love coast. Much as I love black, I think you could get away with a really bold colour. £70 off too.

This is much more fun than shopping for myself/ making DS's breakfast.

This shape could be nice on you too. Comes in loads of colours. Has panels and is below knee length.

Waist detail is flattering too.

Short version of the juniper dress. Gorgeous. Think slightly flared would be nice like the Jinny dress linked above.

Oh, you're going to look lovely.

DS is trying to get his own weetabix so must desist now. Look what you've started!

Ooh nice choices HM! Maxi yet not acres of fabric.

Oh, and just explain to DS that Auntie LLW needs a dress for a wedding in two months time so breakfast will just have to wait!