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Style and beauty

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Original poster

Please help - in SIL's wedding and I am going to look stupid

65 replies

AnnieBeansMum · 02/05/2010 17:55

Well I stupidly agreed to be in my sister-in-laws wedding and she has bought this bridesmaid dress. Not bad on the model, but considering we are all sized 16-20 - not so good. I have major issues with my back and upper arms (pcos problems) but she didn't seem to care about that (she actually said "well I need to make sure no one outshines me on the day" ). She has now suggested these shoes and I'm desperately trying to find alternatives.

I'm already going to look like a house in the dress and now even my feet will look horrible. Please someone help. It's a June wedding, so I think we need sandals, but surely not these??

I think the age gap is showing - she is 24 as is her other bridesmaid. I'm 32, overweight and am freaking out about what she is going to make me look like.

OP posts:

ruddynorah · 03/05/2010 15:00

your choice of dress is far better than hers.

her choice flairs out at the waist so is very unflattering for most people.

JackBauerIsZonerrific · 03/05/2010 15:01

Oh god, poor you.
height of bad manners to make you pay for something you don't want to wear as well.
I woudl be tempted to spill something stainworthy down my changing bag just to piss ehr off tbh.

Can be of no help with style stuff but you have my sympathies. My sister is getting married and has already told me I have to cover up my cleavage so I don't look like a slut Just nod, smile and store it to laughin her face in 10 years when she apologises.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 03/05/2010 15:08

Just cry off sick for the day.

queenoftheslatterns · 03/05/2010 15:20

you have my sympathies. my db is getting married on the 26th june too and as a bridesmaid i have to wear this. i have red hair and am very petite. i look like a HSM reject in it. add to which the fact i have teitzes and my ribs/shoulder blades are very pronounced and bumpy... not a good look.

Original poster

AnnieBeansMum · 03/05/2010 16:57

Thanks for all your support everyone! I have been worried about this wedding since day one - the girl has absolutely horrible taste so I knew whatever we wore, it wouldn't be good.

I shall grin and bear it - and then roast the dress on an open fire!

OP posts:

KristinaM · 03/05/2010 18:06

LOL queen - thats a lovely dress....but not for a tiny skinny bony redhead

you could look so beautiful in a delicate wisp of a dress in blues or greens that wouldn't suit most of the rest of us . bet you have porcelaine skin as well

i dont understand why brides dont consider the members of their wedding party ( style, shape, height, age, colouring) and choose outfits that will flatter them.

When i got married i was very scrawny slim and looked anorexic in a didnt want a strapless dress. especially not one with a full skirt in shiny satin. its apparently the law that you MUST wear such a dress on your weding day, as every bridal shop i went into turned me away at the door

eventually i came to my senses and just decided to wear something that suited me rather than a " proper" wedding dress, of course you don't have that luxury as a bridesmaid

bran · 03/05/2010 18:48

I just choked slightly on my tea when I read that she wanted you to buy a new changing bag. I've lost all sympathy for the bride. Do you have something in your wardrobe that you could wear if you "accidently" spilt bleach on the dress that she has foisted on you?

Aitch · 03/05/2010 22:37

you are being ridiculously nice about this, anniebean, are you a bit frightened of the bride perchance?

bran · 03/05/2010 23:11

Actually, you don't even need bleach. You have a small child who can provide and entirely plausible excuse. A nappy explosion should do the trick.

The bride will blame you and hate you, but TBH it sounds as though she doesn't much care for anyone. Everybody else will be very understanding that these things just happen.

cyteen · 04/05/2010 09:09

I think you should encourage a nappy explosion near the bride, tbh

Wanderingsheep · 04/05/2010 09:54

I can't believe you have to pay for your own dress but have no control about what you wear .

I went to a wedding on Friday where the bride had paid for the bridesmaid's (beautiful) dresses, she had bought them earings, necklaces, little bags with make up in and underwear! The only thing she had told them not to do was wear too high shoes (the bride is very small).

I'm getting married in August and I'm not having bridesmaids, except for DD as I'm too tight I can't afford to buy more dresses!

bran · 04/05/2010 10:09

@ cyteen

Original poster

AnnieBeansMum · 04/05/2010 11:04

I am being overly nice about it because we are emigrating a few days after the wedding and I don't want to leave on a sour note. There is a 16 year age gap between her and my DH and he more or less raised her. She is very important to him and he to her. She is absolutely devastated that we are leaving and I do not want to do anything else to upset her.

Might be too nice of me, but for the sake of a little peace, I will deal with it.

OP posts:

Original poster

AnnieBeansMum · 04/05/2010 11:05

And I do love the idea of a nappy explosion!! Too many bananas seem to have that effect on DD - I shall feed her nothing but bananas for the week before the wedding

OP posts:

Aitch · 04/05/2010 11:09

you are sainted in my eyes...

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