Over 40's help me! I am an old hag.

[hellymelly]

I have suddenly aged!no honestly I have and its making me feel very gloomy indeed.I have always had nice skin and looked younger than my age.I'm 46 now and in the past month or so I look a lot more lined,my skin is dried out and blotchy and if I press my face it puckers in a horrible old-lady way (not that old ladies are horrible,but you get my drift)I am thinking this might be peri-menopausal dropping oestrogen,as I have other signs that my hormones are shifting .So is there a face cream that helps ? I have very sensitive skin and although I am happy to flash the cash I will have to buy online (no decent shops near me)and that makes it tricky to get any advice.What do you use and love? Does anything zap fine lines?

Reading this thread with interest. I shall be 44 this year and am definitely noticing that thing you all talk about on here - suddenly I am losing my youthfulness and there are lots of small signs of the clock ticking that are only going to get worse...

Fortunately, fortunately I am still slim and can wear most things, and I take good care of myself mostly. But my hair is definitely getting some grey in it and I am wondering whether to get some highlights... I am naturally blonde, though darker than I used to be.

Sometimes I look at older women and long to undye their hair and remove their make-up. There are a lot of overdone women where I live. But... what do you think?

stillcrazy I have a fear of being mistaken for dd's grandma (my girls are 2 and 5)I am shuddering for you.Or DH's mother,or older sister (he is 8 years younger than me)When We were both in our 30's I didn't notice the age difference but last night I mentioned to him that I might have to trade him in for an older model,just so that I can be the peachy and lustrous young thing.Frazzled I am torn between jealousy/admiration and exhaustion at your routine.Think maybe I need to upgrade though,I have swanned about for years in cute little tweed suits and other granny like items,my curly hair left to its own devices,but now I am actually old enough to be a granny maybe that is not a good look.

Bonsoir- I agree , too much slap is very ageing. Subtle and natural is the way to go.
I do think that being too thin can be ageing as well though.

I am going to give the eve fraser facial exercises a go. She looks amazing for 80!

Bonsoir - I think if you are slim and can wear relatively youthful clothes, not muttony, of course, you are 75% there. The rest is maintenance.

IMVHO, greying hair is one of the most ageing factors in a womans appearance.

I too am a natural blonde and will do everything I can to stay that way, natural or not! I have foil highlights in two different shades and then the roots done whilst the foils are on because I felt the grey was showing too much between highlights.

And, lets face it,Bonsoir, we all look better with a little make up, once we are over 30 anyway! Does not have to be overdone at any age.

I have a few grey hairs.

My "problem" is that I love my hair colour & have never dyed it.

What I would like is something that covers grey only & leaves the rest alone.
I´m sure this exists-what´s it called?

Too much make up and hair dye coupled with a definite hair 'style'is very ageing.Shiny hair that moves and glowy skin with a bit of blusher looks young.

diddly - exactly! I love my natural hair colour, so it is not easy to make the decision as to when the grey becomes too much. Even the hairdressers are pretty hopeless on this - and they are in the business of selling hair dye!

I don't wear much make up, but I always wear some - and always, always have dyed eyelashes, so am never completely au naturel.

Another one for the list here.

I have only read half the thread but thought I'd better mark my place.

I too am mid 40s and suddenly people have stopped saying " wow you look great for your age" or going when I tell them how old I am.

The other week I had a makeover in John Lewis and the make-up guy was talking about panda eyes and sallow skin. Is he talking about me?

My skin is so dry and I must be keeping up sales of Garnier Nutrisse Colour all on my own.

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

If you have dry and sensitive skin (I do), these are the products I recommend:

A-DERMA Sensiphase cleanser
Avène Extremely Rich Compensating Cream (face)
Avène Trixéra+ Emollient Cream (from the neck down)
La Roche-Posay Xérand hand cream

Message withdrawn

That's an excellent philosophy, Frazzled.

Hellymelly - My meagre comfort at being thought to be dd's grandmother is that we live in an area where being pregnant at 15 is far from unusual and so there really are people my age who are (great)grandmothers. So perhaps the woman who said "I see you've got your granddaughter with you" can be excused on that basis.

I think my DD's school must have the most ancient average parent age on earth - I had her at 38 and there are plenty of mothers of children in DD's year who are much, much older than me.

Completey agree with you frazzled- very well said.

Thankyou..What an inspiring post Frazzled! I'm tempted to print that off and stick it up. Bravo!

I think as others have said, that the cold weather combined with central heating doesn't help. Treat yourself to a facial, do the old T&S salmon and cantaloupe thing, wait for Spring - or resign yourself to Norman Parkinson/Bailey/La Deneuve et al "After forty It's your face or your bum" and scoff a few cream cakes

(Well okay, Catherine probably didn't use the term "bum", but I've certainly seen her use that as a justification for putting on a (few) pounds.)

Other than that - take frazzled's advice.

sorry hellymelly if I freaked you out...

Thought you were someone else. I happen to know a MNer with a name not dissimilar to yours who happens to be 46 with two daughters, curly hair and a 'china doll' look (she may kill me for saying this!)

Anyhoww, good tips!

Ha ha Wilfsell who is my doppleganger? And how do you know I have two daughters?did I mention daughters..?(shrill "mommy dearest" voice.)

At old hag grand age of 43,I find that
glossy,blow dried/straightened slightly or waved,no grey hair is the way to go!
Also,I drink loads of water,have an afternoon snooze most days,always wear some make up,discreet fake tan/glowiness,accessorize outfit etc ...
Am both lazy and vain,which is somewhat challenging...

Also frazzled that is a kind and thoughtful post. but now I am wondering if I am indeed focusing on my face because in fact the deeper issue of my bedroom wallpaper needs addressing.(I grew up with a mother who can out martyr Joan of Arc so I don't do martyrdom,and certainly not cheerless drudgery ,I am shallow enough to just want to look half decent in a cute new dress and a nice lipstick.)
Bonsoir I want my dds to go to yours' school.I think I must be the oldest Mother at the gates here,all the others are in the full bloom of youth and I am the flowers wilting in the vase.uggh.

An afternoon snooze

Indeed,Noddy.
I thoroughly recommend.

I'm not at all grey yet,Dh has more grey than me,I only have the odd hair.I think I really need to up the water and down the heating.My skin has really dried out in the last month with the heating on all the time.(thyroid is a bit dicky so I'm always freezing and I hog the fire like an old sheepdog.) What is the melon and salmon diet? I'm veering more towards the face/bum cream cake diet....

Yes... you mentioned your two daughters up the thread, you loon

I am NOT stalking you in a weird way, I promise.

As you were.

I have the memory of a slug.Actually I did think I must have mentioned them but I was too tired to re-read the postings.What does your lovely friend,my alter-ego,use for face cream?

am not 40 yet but started dying this year.
its a chore tbh.
a bit of grey around crown