What to wear to a school reunion if I don't want to look exactly the same as the other 100 middle aged women there

[KristinaM]

Title says it all really... its a drinks reception and dinner, in September.

I don't go to many functions but have one black dress. But I suspect that there will be another 99 women all wearing LBSs. Except of course the one former pupil who is a sleb who will no doubt be wearing this

A 30 year school reunion - woman, you have balls of steel!

LOL daisy. Its like watching a car crash - i know i should just walk away but I'm strangely fascinated.....

obviously don't know where you live but i swear by banana republic's personal shopper service. really good and v helpful

I' afraid i am hundreds of miles from regent st

their stuff looks lovely

so waht about house of frazer or debenhams? they have such a big mix of stuff - or take a friend who you like the style/look of, and go with them? a new view reallly helps, but dress out of you rcomfort zone!

overthemill - i am thinking of trying john lewis and house of fraser personal shoppers but suspect i should wait until after summer wedding madness is over

otherwise they wil put me in this or this

this in green with www.monsoon.co.uk/invt/32329603&bklist=icat,4,shop,women,bolerosandshrugs this?

i reckon a wrap dress 3/4 sleeve, make sure it a good length on the knee not below (too aging) - if you go too evening dress it can be very middle-aged - like youve made too much effort?

how's your hair? now could be a good time to try something a bit funky and there is time to grow it back a bit! colour etc ok?

i would say def not monsoon for an occasion with loads of other women - chances of two dresses being the same very very high

there are some nice anglomania dresses on my-wardrobe.com if your budget will stretch. The red picnic one looks nice - not boring black, looks like it might be a forgiving shape too, without being tent like. Vivienne westwood is good for the non-flat chested. you could always send it back if it's crap : )

Urban Outfitters Boutique do Anglomania too - I'm not trying a link because I don't feel lucky.

The link I tried earlier was to a Philip Lim dress - I still think it would be worth having a look at some of those on-line, getting pix and asking a personal shopper if they could find something similar.

And this is sort of weird, but I was walking past Oasis today and they had a camellia-patterned dress and top in the window. The top would have to be worn with a jacket and skinnies/leggings (and I'm not sure that's your style) and the dress is too long and dressy for this - so you'd have to take it up, which is a faff, as well as dressing it down with a jacket. But anyway, I thought I'd try linking to it just because the pattern is really lovely.
here goes

It's amazing - I'm strangely compelled by your post - I think it's because it touches a nerve.

I think whoever made the comment about outfoxing them by stylish dressing down was spot on - you don't want to look like you've tried TOO hard, but effortlessly sexy is ideal - very floaty wide legged trousers, fab statement shoes, a little nipped in jacket with wide shoulders and a fitted top underneath (like a bustier) to show off the enormous norks that flat chested girls like me would kill for.

I.E this in the gray (which is actually more of a minky colour with a hint of pink):

www.asos.com/Vila/Vila-Loose-Crop-Blazer/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=630023&SearchQuer y=blazer&sh=0&pge=0&pgesize=20&sort=-1&clr=Black

and some amazing trousers like these (sadly these are out of stock in a 12):

www.asos.com/Asos-Luxe/Asos-Palazzo-Super-Wide-Trousers/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=4382 92&SearchQuery=wide%20trousers&sh=0&pge=0&pgesize=20&sort=-1&clr=Black

And shoes (although these may not be your taste.)

www.shoestudio.com/fcp/product/pied-a-terre/Shoes/ADRANO/8940

What about this?

www.warehouse.co.uk/fcp/product/fashion/Dresses/drape-front-dress/12149

I think it would flatter your shape

thanks lulubee! yep trousers can look a bit fresher - not so much 'i might wear this to a wedding'

love this

with fancy tights

jocasta, snigger

I went to a school reunion the other friday and had all of this to worry about as well. Nightmare! Try House of Fraser. I am a young looking 41 and i always shop at Zara, but I know what you mean about wanting to go more upmarket. 40's are a funny age for clothes, as you dont want to look like a frump but also dont want the mutton look.

this top and cropped trousers - or black wide leg trousers if you don't do cropped