Do you only feel comfortable with long hair?

[Watoose]

After cutting mine after both children I have quickly realised (then forgotten again, and done it again) that I cannot feel like 'myself' without long hair.

It's weird - there are a few reasons I suppose.

One, it makes me feel as though I am judged as a whole body rather than just my face and hair - if it's short I feel rather exposed and as though I have to wear very neat clothes and look smart, and be thin, because I'm more visible and also short hair is usually more 'controlled' iyswim.

My clothes also seem wrong for short hair, I like flarey knee length skirts, or longer, or dresses, or maybe jeans - but not in a neat sort of way really.

It just doesn't suit my personality having short hair.

Does anyone else feel like this? It's now just past shoulder length and the relief at being 'me' again is incredible.
Also I can get out the clothes I got before I cut it and wear them again!

Watoose, I am like you. I feel wrong with shorter hair, although admire it on others. I think hair is am important part of your personal style, and some people just seem to suit longer hair.

I had it just above shoulder length a while ago, and I too am only just beginning to feel 'me' again! Spooky.

It;s so much more versatile I find (although hard work, takes ages to dry etc.) I've vowed never to cut it that shirt again!

Yes, exactly the same. I had my hair cut into a long bob about a year ago and instantly regretted it. I know just what you mean about it not suiting your personality, too. My hair has to be at least a couple of inches below shoulder length for me to feel like 'me'.

I have a tiny head on a 'normal' frame. With a terribly square face. With short head I'd look like some sort of alien from Men In Black

always had very long hair...it suits my clothes and i just wouldn't feel "me" with short hair....(will put some photos on my profile page one day.)

Lol Molly I'm sure you wouldn't really!

Girls I think we need to form a society.
I don't dye mine either - can't work out why it would help iyswim, it just wrecks it surely?

The way I see it it's difficult enough to get it looking nice without adding to the issues!!

I think in hindsight the reason I hacked it orf when the kids were tiny were twofold - firstly my self esteem was very low as I was on my own with new babies, so was in 'it can't make things worse and might help' frame of mind - it made things worse! But somehow couldn't talk myself out of it.

Secondly it went all thin and widdly after the babies. It was pathetic. Normally I'd just tie it up in a bun and ignore, but I just hated the way it felt. It's grown thicker again now but takes about 18mo.

Hi DP. Gosh you are brave. I would never put piccies online, well maybe with my face blanked out gangster style if I was desperate for hair advice.

I put one on my profile a year ago with a fringe - it was hideous!! Everyone was very polite

long hair is hard work..i sometimes have mine in 8 plaits to keep it under control...( i have a very,.. er.."individual" look)...but that's the great thing about long hair..it's versatility.

I could have written your OP Watoose! Except I only cut it off the once. I have the slowest growing hair in the world so it has taken me 18 months to get it almost to a jaw length bob, whch actually suits me. OTOH as I'm quite tall and was v thin when I had it cut, I did start wearing make up properly, otherwise I looked like a bloke

I used to wear mine in two pigtails (at each side of head) until my brother said I looked like a Dutch barmaid, Charming!

Oh I wish I could keep a smart bob in a way. But I'd be useless at getting it to look tidy or getting it cut.
I haven't been to the hairdressers since I cut it all off 18m ago. I know I should as the ends will get all splitty but not yet, just not yet!

You're right Dafty it's much more versatile isn't it. I feel like even if I look rubbish, at least my hair is there. I wish it was that thick, at 8 plaits!!!

i always thought i was like this - after a traumatic crop aged 5 i vowed 'never again!' and had practically waist-length hair until i suddenly decided to bob it, aged 16. since then it's been everything from a 2 inch pixie crop to mid-arm length, and the only time i start not feeling like me is when it's been the same for too long. in fact i am planning to hack it mostly off again soon for similar reasons to you Watoose i.e. the curse of the post-partum hair loss...but also because i feel styleless and invisible with it how it is and want to feel more like me again.

Lol MrsSB, it was probably lovely, I liked having a plait each side and it did suit my face but have now got OLD and can't get away with it probably

Yes. Plaits.

How come mine was all scraggly at the ends and yet Anna Kournikova's plait stayed 'chunky' all the way down?

lol @ gangster style....i kinda dress abit weird actually...have you ever seen the matrix?

long hair is more versatile, but there always comes a time when i find myself doing nothing other than scraping it into a ponytail to keep it out of the way each day. that's when i know it's time for a change.

Cyteen, it must be nice to feel free with short hair - I wish I could but every time I think it will be liberating, I feel like I've almost lost my 'self' along with the hair. No idea why. it's spooky.

erm, yes a bit of it DP, I am was too dim to 'get' it though so didn't watch it all the way through.

hair is a very powerful signifier of identity though. there's a reason why big life events are often accompanied by radical new haircuts!

Plaits that stay chunky all the way down. Don't get me started

Does anyone else worry about getting too old for long hair?

I'm mid thirties now but everyone says I look about 27. I think I'd like long hair when I'm old anyway. Old glam ladies with white buns

Message withdrawn

I think the age/long hair thing is largely a myth. Years ago there was no mad rush to cut hair after a certain age; ladies simply wore it up in an elegant chignon. (I am still trying to figure out how to achieve this properly btw!)

Again, high maintenance but so chic!

I'm in the process of growing my hair again, it was waist length until a year ago when I had 14 inches off, then another few, until it was almost a POB (remember that one?). It looked good when I bothered to dry it properly but most of the time I didn't so there was no advantage. I'd rather have long straggly hair and be 'me' than have carefully styled hair and be 'not me'.

Bloss you are lucky

MrsSB - this is something I actually find quite easy. I've got sort of wavy, quite thinnish, blondy brown hair and it is quite resistant to glamour, I mean it will never hang straight, never stay brushed etc etc, so an updo works really well. (for that read 'tricks people into thinking you make an effort!')

What I normally do is bung it into a highish ponytail, then swirl it round messily into a kind of heap and then stick pins in in random places to keep it there, so little bits hang off it in an attractive manner (yup, right ) and it gets messier all through the day till it falls down completely or I get pin related headache.

You can also do the same low at the back without the ponytail - just kind of grasp it all in a bunch and swirl it round, then add the pins. They have to be grippy pins, not the pylon ones iyswim unless your hair is v thick!

Ah, I think I have been going wrong with the pins then. I was doing the ponytail twisting bit, but using the pylon kind (great description!)