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Original poster

If I'm getting married without a wedding does it matter what I wear?

76 replies

BroccoliSpears · 19/07/2008 20:18

The plan is to go down to the registery office; 10 minute ceremony, two witnesses, no rings, no celebration.

DP is going to wear jeans and that's fine.

Shall I just wear whatever I would have worn anyway to take the kids to playgroup and zip round sainsburys?

Or do I wear something vaguely smarter?

Do I get something new?

Something new that I'll wear lots that just happens to be new on the day I get married? A nice skirt maybe?

Do we take a photo? Head says not because it's just a legality and we didn't take a photo when we switched mortgage provider or wrote our wills. Heart starts wondering if dd might one day ask for a photo of the day we got married. But I suppose my answer is that we didn't want a wedding so no photos. But if we do take a photo.... what do I wear?

Hummmmm.

I know this isn't simply a style and beauty question, but I'm posting here because I like it here and it is about clothes

OP posts:
Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 14:04

This?

(I'll stop now)

OP posts:
Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 14:06

This is only £25

Who did you have there Expat?

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norkmaiden · 22/07/2008 14:07

oh red polka dot dress is cute (second one)
I quite like the Boden one too (either red or green)

What's your preferred outfit - dress or top and trs? I guess dress needs to be wrap style for bf?

norkmaiden · 22/07/2008 14:10

this is unusual but quite gorgeous imo. would look fab with the skirt on same page!

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 14:12

Yes, the polkadot one is out of stock in a 14 though.

At the moment I'm leaning towards a dress. Shirt dress or wrap probably, but am quite a brazen and well seasoned BFer so would cope with popping a muslin or a cardi on if I had a dress I could pull down to feed .

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expatinscotland · 22/07/2008 14:13

We grabbed two blokes in suits and ties sitting on a bench (it was a beautiful May day), about to eat a bagged lunch.

They phoned their boss and got permission to have a longer lunch.

So they stood witness for us, took photos on their mobiles as evidence (and the office people kindly wrote them a letter), then we took them for lunch in a chi chi restaurant across the road and all drank champagne before they went back to work.

They snapped some photos for us on the digital camera and the office people did, too.

Six years on and we're expecting our third child.

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 14:13

That is gorgeous NM, but NO WAY would I put anything fitted and satin on my belly. Have mercy - I only had a baby 10 weeks ago!

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norkmaiden · 22/07/2008 14:16

hear you on the clingy satin!

nice but might be limited wrt bf

might not be your bag but this is so cute

wrappy?

norkmaiden · 22/07/2008 14:22

poss too formal, but this would make a fab two-piece with lots of potential for using again imo

www.toast.co.uk/product2.aspx?categorypath=daywear/trousers&productid=C4I7M-C4I7N-C4S7I-C4S7J&catego ryref=%2fcategory2.aspx%3fcategorypath%3ddaywear%2ftrousers%26nopaging%3dtrue

www.toast.co.uk/product2.aspx?categorypath=daywear/tops&productid=CNS7H&categoryref=%2fcategory2.asp x%3fcategorypath%3ddaywear%2ftops%26nopaging%3dtrue

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 14:28

That's a lovely colour, but no BF access short of taking my top off, which I could do I suppose...

Like the other links, but not perfect. Red dress good, but seems too formal and eveningy with long sleeves.

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Tigerschick · 22/07/2008 14:30

WRT the witness thing - my dad was a witness for soemone when he called in at the registry office to check some details for his own wedding. You can, as expat says, ask anyone to do it but you do need to have two people willing and able to step in.

Congrats btw - sorry, no help with outfit.

stitch · 22/07/2008 14:38

its your wedding. wear what you want to wear.
it may just be a legality, but, its a nice one. its a personal one.
it matters what you wear, because itis still your wedding. just not a big church do
and, yes, i think you should take a picture.
it isnt a whizz round the shops, it is your wedding.
wear something that makes you feel pretty, something that makes you feel happy to be you.

stitch · 22/07/2008 14:40

in some parts of the world, some places ask for wedding pictures, as well as a marriage certificate to authenticate legitimacy of a child. not applicable here ,but i thought i'd throw that in too.

norkmaiden · 22/07/2008 14:46

more links

wrap

presums buttons open

bargain spotted

iheartsunsets · 22/07/2008 14:48

Hey BroccoliSpears, have you decided what you are doing after the ceremony yet?

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 18:58

If that giant spot one cam in green it would be perfect!

I think after the ceremony we'll go to a cafe and have lunch or a cup of tea and a bun, depending on the time of day and whether the children need a nap.

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Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 22/07/2008 18:59

Really Stitch? About the photo as proof of legitimacy? Interesting. Not sure if a wedding snap that featured dd and ds would be quite the ticket.

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kingprawntikka · 22/07/2008 19:17

I am near leeds and would happily come and be a witness!!

teafortwo · 22/07/2008 19:59

Hi Broc!!!

I love love love the Monsoon dress!!!!! Red is not my colour if they had it in blue I would have worn it for my wedding and everyday until it got a hole in it!

I also bought dd a new dress. She wore it today to the science museum. Again, like mine it was everyday but a bit special!

So, so, so.... I thought you might be interested in actually what happened with dd and God dd and her brother during the ceremony as we wanted them to feel involved but with no pressure.

When we arrived they showed us the room we were to go to. The little boy in our party woke up and started to cry. I told his sister she could take any of the toys out of my bag to cheer him up. In the bag I had a blow-up beach ball incase we stopped in a park. She took it out blew it up and they started playing with it.

The registrar came in and we went out to verify the info on certificate. When we came back everyone was going mad over the ball. Playing catch!

The registrar said - it is really nice like this! Lets just talk while the children play. So we (the adults) didn't even sit down we just gathered round and the children played ball behind us between us and with us as the words were said.

It was very relaxed. I had said we wanted to sit in a circle so everyone was included but I think now there is no need to plan a specific seating arrangement. If I were you I would just note on your wedding vows that you want a very relaxed ambience which includes the children please!

Hope this is useful...

stitch · 23/07/2008 09:00

the stories on here are making me blub.
this is how weddings are supposed to be. and how they used tobe in the far off land called the past. [sigh]

broc, yes, wedding picutres featuring the children might not be much good at proving legitimacy. but they will be nice for the kids themselves, to know they were there, at such an impotrtant time.

slug · 23/07/2008 13:22

Damn, no, Brocolli. I'm sure if you put the call out there would be mumsnetters who would do the honours.

S1ur · 23/07/2008 13:48

I got married with dd at my side and dp holding ds in his arms. Was fantastic

Went for an italian after, then had a party at home.

All lots of fun.

When are you getting married?

madamez · 23/07/2008 17:48

Not saying you should do stuff you are not comfortable with, Broccoli, but if you try to make your wedding too workaday and 'just a piece of paper' you might get official pointy-heads sniffing round you wondering if there is some sort of scam going on (especially if either of you looks less than 100% white or speaks with the merest hint of a foreign accent).
But the idea of putting out a call for MNers to be witnesses is a good one - that means it's not a matter of insulting any friends/rellies by picking one person over another, but not quite the same as having to grab random loonies from the street.

KristinaM · 23/07/2008 19:57

yeah you could get half a dozen random loonies off the internet

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 23/07/2008 21:09

If any official pointy-heads come sniffing around they will find dp and I living cheerfully together in our suburban home with our two children and our smelly dog. It would be a very boring day in the life of an official pointy-head .

Nowt wrong with random loonies off the internet. I had a lovely picnic with one of them today.

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