Please help - hair so matted after washing I can't get a brush through

[CheerfulBunny]

Please can someone advise? My hair has become steadily more tangled and matted to the extent that after I washed it tonight, I can't get my fingers through it at all. I'm just pulling loads out trying to brush it and now I'm panicking a bit.

I suspected it might be a hard water build up so bought some clarifying shampoo and did a cider vinegar rinse, then used my usual redken shampoo and conditioner. I also bought a filter head for the shower. If anything, it's even worse and even more matted.

The water company where I live has recently advised that the water will be even harder due to the minerals at source. My hair is fine, highlighted and dry anyway and has become wavy and frizzy as I've got older, although it appears straight when dry. It won't hold waves or curls, its too fine and flyaway.

Please, has anyone had this and found a solution? I've got some much broken hair from trying to brush it out and the texture is horrible. My hairdresser is no help, unfortunately.

I get tangly hair in the shower. Have you tried Elseve 8 Second Wonder Water? I find that really helps - and helps instantly!

I was about to say more conditioner.

You say it looks fine when styled- did you get the matt untangled?
Everyone loses about 100 hairs/day, if you are not managing to brush it, those hairs, or some of them, will be added to the clump- it’s imperative that you deal with it completely fairly soon. Another poster mentioned a ‘Tangle teezer’ brush- they are palm sized and have very flexible soft bristles.
I’d highly recommend buying one today - washing your hair and adding conditioner, which you can leave in.
Start with a small section of matted hair and start repeatedly brushing about an inch or two, only when it’s clear start moving up.
Use your fingers, up close to the scalp, and wriggle then down to the matt to isolate the clump.
I wouldn’t be adding any styling products until you’ve dealt with it.
My personal experience with my daughter who insisted she was Repunzel for a few years..!

Wet your hair and put conditioner on the knotted areas and leave it 10 mins then work the comb through it before rinsing the conditioner off.

Buy your self some detangle spray such as Gliss. I have even used the kids branded detangle sprays because they work so well for me as I have extremly fine hair which is a pain in the ass due to knots and flys up in the air when I sneeze!

@CheerfulBunny I had this happen to my hair after dying it too many times too close together (3 times in about 2 weeks). The only thing that helped dematt it was a rice rinse from John Frieda. The one I got was for volumising but they do others. You use it after shampooing and it was like magic how my hair smoothed out, and then I would condition my hair. Until I tried this, nothing worked.
Also, clarifying my hair made it worse, and I only did it as I thought I product build up and not damage. I'm almost a year on and it is so much better, but it has made me very hesitant about dying it again.

https://www.boots.com/john-frieda/john-frieda-silk-waters

Good luck, hope it works for you!

edited to add a link to my post about my matted hair

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/style_and_beauty/5427716-clarifying-shampoo-for-curly-dyed-hair?reply=148727075

This might work: wet your hair and put plenty of conditioner on first, let it penetrate the hair, rinse, then shampoo only once. Wrap your hair in a towel, and then comb with a wide-toothed comb.
Your hair is clumping because it's been treated and stripped of its natural oils.
It's definitely not "build up". Use a moisturising shampoo for colour treated hair, clarifying shampoos are very drying.
Maybe use a moisurising mask regularly as well.

This. It’s what I do after days outside all day in heavy weather when my hair is like one big dreadlock (I work outside so hazard of the job)

Clarifying shampoo and vinegar will dry it out further hence make it worse. The only thing that ever worked for me was the hair oil/hair mask combination my hair salon suggested which didn’t contain silicones - it was quite expensive but lasted for ages and worked. I gave it to my friend and she’s using it on her daughters’ hair too which gets very tangled - it was by Ches Editions and I used the Edition 29 hair oil together with their hair mask - I mixed the oil and mask together in my palms as suggested to me and put it on dry hair a good hour before washing (I may have left it longer tbh). It made an actual difference (it’s completely natural and is meant to be very high grade) x

Your frizzy hair will be easier to condition and comb once you trim off a few inches.
The ends are dry. The colour could also be drying. Always add conditioner to your wet hair, comb through and leave in.

Start by combing at the very ends and move upwards, working through a square inch of your scalp area at a time. Allow an hour to comb out the knots.

I also have very fine hair that tangles easily. Moving forward, you need to start protecting it at night, either with a silk/satin bonnet, or by plaiting hair before bed.

Tangle teezer brushes are good, but they don't go deep enough when you have proper knots. If it's actually matted, like it looks in the photo you shared, you need to go in and divide that mat with the point of a rat tail comb, or even a chopstick. Smother the hair in any conditioner (doesn't have to be expensive), and just get to work combing through it.

You need excessive amounts of conditioner. Soak your hair and then just load as much conditioner into it as you can. Don’t rinse it out. Let it sit for at least 10 minutes. Then use a detangling brush starting with one section from the bottom. A section could be as small as a centimeter. Add more conditioner as you work to keep it from drying. Once you get one bit of hair freed and detangled, set it to the side and work on the next bit. You can’t do the whole mass in its entirety.

This would be a good task in a nice warm bath and maybe set up a video to the side to watch because it’s going to take time. Lots of time.