Mother of the Groom in 8 weeks!

[ihaveafavouritecat]

Please help me! My son is getting married in 8 weeks and I haven’t a clue what to wear. So far I’ve ordered three dresses online (Coast, Lavish Alice and Florere) and have sent them all back. Earlier this week I had a personal stylist appointment at John Lewis, bought 3 items (Hobbs dress, Reiss dress and Phase Eight jumpsuit), but not sure any of them are right. Also ordered a jumpsuit from Me+Em, not yet received. I don’t know if that will be right either, I know it will need shortening about 6 inches!
I’m 5’3, 9st 6, have lost 7 stone over last 3 years. Blue eyes, brown hair/blond highlights. i think the colours that suit me best are greens/golds/sandy but not at all rigid except that pastel colours make me look washed out.
There’s a register office wedding service and then the bigger wedding ‘do’ 3 days later, so I need two outfits! Budget about £400ish for both. I just feel so much of what I’m seeing is so ‘bland’ and ordinary, I want to feel a bit more cool and funky but still smart of course.
Would really appreciate some help or suggestions of makers/brands I’m not aware of… thanks in advance.

I'm glad you didn't get those particular ones.

I can see both chunkier Esska/Chie Mihara ones, or lighter more delicate pointed toe ones, work with the jumpsuit. It is a matter of personal taste. But those Esska ones were not the right style.

That's a fabulous cat!!!

Thank you @EleanorMc67. I’d love to see the options you mention above. I’m so touched that you would do this for me. You’re all so super helpful. I really loved seeing those ‘ensemble’ pictures you were sharing a few days ago. Not sure if that’s the right terminology, but where you were setting out dress/shoes/bag/earrings. That’s such a great way to get a sense of the whole look. I’m still keeping those earrings in mind that you shared a while back: pink/ green/gold colourway… for the khaki dress at least.
I probably need to try both those dresses on again and make my mind up, given that I didn’t get a clear steer from future DDIL. I think the olive dress, and everything that I can put with it, feels more familiar and do-able… I’m very comfortable with that colour palette, in my home as well. Teal is much less familiar to me, I’ve never really worn it… and yet as I mentioned I was surprised how good it looked when I tried the dress on, and lots of you said you loved the teal, as did a friend of mine who has a great fashion sense and style. She described it as a ‘richer’ colour . But I’m much less sure how to accessorise it, I need to find your ensemble picture for it again 🤔

Nice boots. Elegant heel & toe. Trying to envision what they'd look like with the jumpsuit though, & think I'd still prefer a closed-toe, pointed slingback of some kind.

Agree re pale-coloured footwear. I dislike most nude/beige court shoes - they remind me of the plasticky shoes that they put on shop dummies in stores, to supposedly go with everything ...

I am not keen on the olive M&S shoes, which I think look quite cheap close-up, & are a shade of greeny-brown that verges on the farmyard a little too much for my liking ... sorry OP, I know you've ordered them!

I like both colours, & both look good on you. The green is, essentially, a lighter version of the jumpsuit colour isn't it? A little bit more yellowy in tone, plus paler & a fairly matte satin not velvet - yes? So it does mean that you could wear the same, or some of the same accessories, if you wanted to. Though I think you could wear accessories that would work with both the jumpsuit & the teal dress too! Has the friend who liked the teal one seen both? Can you ask for a vote from her & your family as to which they prefer?

I do wonder if the silk velvet fabric, its lustre, & the swooshy-ness of the legs (almost more like a skirt) make the jumpsuit that bit dressier in reality, & therefore possibly more for the main day than the registry do? Have you decided yourself?

No that’s okay, they can go back if they need to! I took several things back today and sent some others back on Friday. Thanks @owlpassport and @EleanorMc67I’m listening!
I have the two dresses and jumpsuit hanging on my bedroom door in a trio of gorgeousness. It’s a good place to keep seeing them and imagining different looks. I think if the teal only works with black shoes that’s a dealbreaker for me. I don’t wear black at all (used to, but just not for me now), and I wouldn’t want to wear it for my son’s wedding. Similarly, I don’t want to buy silver jewellery, as I never wear that either. I’ll keep looking. I at least have the advantage of having the dresses and jumpsuit right here to look at, while pondering shoes and bags on my phone… Let me revisit yours and PP’s posts for suggestions. I agree though, that a pointy toed thing is needed, nothing chunky, for any of these outfits. They’re too soft and flow-y to end in chunky.

Do you like the teal colour next to the olive-y greens of the other dress & jumpsuit? As I really like those colours together - it's rich & striking in a muted way. And great with gold or bronzey tones.

Thanks. Here they are hanging on my bedroom door, somewhat dimly lit as my husband’s asleep next to me. The jumpsuit in some lights (and maybe wedding photos), could look almost steel/charcoal colour. Because of the lustre of the velvet and the way it changes in the light, I’m not sure how it will look in photos. I hear what you say about the j/suit being the dressier item and thus maybe better suited to the wedding do… and I kind of agree that it’s not the garment I want to rush round rainy streets in. I’m envisaging the hems getting wet and rain soaking up the legs, not great. And suede kitten heels in the rain? So jumpsuit could be the main wedding day outfit. Certainly that’s the day the bride will be wearing her proper wedding dress, bridesmaid dressed up etc. oh god, feel I’m tying myself up in knots here. Must get to sleep actually! But thanks again to all for ongoing input. Very much appreciated! ☺️

Yes I would like to explore that idea further!

@ihaveafavouritecat - I'm going to go off-topic (sort of) now, because I follow this woman on Instagram & was admiring her Dries Van Noten skirt & boots (I've loved his clothes forever).

And it brought to mind the boots you'd liked (& got a bit of a drubbing for ...! Rightfully so, though ... 😉!!). And I remembered all the brocade footwear that Dries Van Noten has done in the past, so I had a wee look on the usual places ...

... and look at these orange & gold Dries ones on eBay! Still a ridiculous price at £500 mind you, but there were loads of variants on this style about some years ago, & there are now many to be had second-hand! All the way from St Laurent & Van Noten (the first two) through to Ted Baker & M&S (the second two).

The Dries Van Noten show this year seems to have had fashion people in a frenzy, so I hope that lots of jacquard & embellishment will be around soon!

But the pair I spotted - that are olive green & gold brocade in your size - are these!!! The photos on Vinted aren't great as they've been taken in artificial light - but you can see them clearly in these other pics. I think they are just beautiful ...

The colour looks right for the jumpsuit - but may not be the right shape as the toe isn't pointed. But they would definitely work & look fabulous with the dress - in either colour, with the right accessories - IMO of course ... And when someone asks where you got your fabulous shoes (which they will!), you can say "What, these old things? Oh, I've had them for ages ... but Dries is having quite a renaissance now, you know ..." 😁!!!

https://www.vinted.co.uk/items/9617471231-dries-van-noten-tapestry-jacquard-heels-size-6-perfect-condition

Btw they were uploaded two months ago, so if you like them, haggle!

Re working in olives/khakis with the teal dress, if that's what you go for, some jacket ideas.

I know some people said that if you're not walking far, then you don't need to bother with a jacket - but that feels wrong & underdressed to me! Maybe it's a weather thing (Irish, living in Scotland, never go anywhere without an extra layer & an umbrella ...), or maybe it's a religious thing (raised Catholic, used to church weddings where a jacket is a must - or used to be!). So I've suggested some lightweight options - they'll also help tie together the teal & olive/khaki elements.

Even the background in the dress photo is a golden-green ... I love it with the teal dress!

The first jacket is new, from Next surprisingly (as it's such a mixed bag of labels & quality these days). But it's a sort of oriental kimono-bomber jacket, & I think the shape of it would be great with the dress (though order an 8 or even a 6? You don't want it too oversized). And it echoes (without overly matching) those fab shoes ... (honestly, I'm a 7 & if you don't get them I'm considering binding my feet!!!).

https://www.next.co.uk/style/su964645/v79263?gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=7926633573&gbraid=0AAAAADm_5UVRCsErEsrQOD_INdLQpG7JL&gclid=CjwKCAjw56zWBhB0EiwAdPOQOXnZkB37JHJ1VYBMXsHGJZSHQexw6k4XqSjr_NVlQMkVL1Y0L-5ABhoC0YIQAvD_BwE

The other two are modern but secondhand. The first is a green velvet one from Me+Em - I know you said before you weren't so keen on velvet blazers, but this is in a cropped style. And the second is a quilted fitted one from Ghost (the sleeves look narrow in the main photo but they're not).

https://ebay.io/m/8hitZi
https://ebay.io/m/kHzY2l

They look so gorgeous hanging up together!

Personally, I wouldn’t risk ordering anything second hand for this, except perhaps a bag.

They are gorgeous and perfect!

I think these could work really well op.

I agree with you that you don't want black, for the same reason a couple of us were saying no heavy leather effect either.

... I actually think if you do try those vinted shoes, you are going to settle on the green dress! It's impossible to be certain of colour via photos but I have the feeling they might just ping the green dress into life!

I also think the heel looks good for you. Not too high, and I am personally not a fan of the very fine kitten heel. It always looks ungainly and a bit matronly to me even though they are having a moment.

Oh my goodness @EleanorMc67 First chance I’ve had to look at this thread this morning - you’ve been on fire in the middle of the night! 👏👏 I need to look at this more carefully, but those boots and shoes are to die for. Those green and gold boots! 😍 You guys are pulling out all the stops for me!
I’m going to be travelling a lot in the next couple of weeks and may not be able to spend as much time with you as I’d like, but wow, I’m loving this , thank you soo much!

They are stunning and I love the shape of the heel. Dreamy shoes! God, I never knew shoes like these existed really!

Where do you usually get your shoes and boots from? I think I’d want a brand that I know fits me well, and even more so if contemplating second hand.

Wow! Love all of these boots.

I know. @RemusLupinsBiggestGroupieRemember the woman who started this thread ten days ago or so? Well that woman took very little interest in fashion, clothes or shoes. When it came to finding some smart heels to try on with those dresses at home, I dug out some open toe heels from Clark’s that I bought for my son’s graduation 9 years ago. The other pair I used for try ons, was a black velvet sparkly pair, bought from Laura Ashley when they still had a store in Bath. We must be talking more than ten years ago. Presumably I had some occasion to wear them but pretty sure I only wore them once.
Mostly for a decade or more, I’ve worn:
Ankle boots from Moda in Pelle, Moshulu
Chelsea boots from Dune
trainers from Moda in Pelle
sandals from Ugg and FitFlop
i broke my ankle about 10 years ago and haven’t worn high heels since then really…
I think I can hear some S+B folk quietly weeping at my poor taste and lack of interest. I can only say that I did not know that the shoes and boots of dreams existed. I am learning The Truth. 🤣

They do - don't they? I love those shades together. And I'm secretly hoping that the OP keeps both dresses!!

Even if she doesn't, I would definitely sign up for sales notifications & snatch the other colour up when it's more of a bargain!

Very pleased that you & @Wildgoat like the shoes too!!

And yes, I think they'd be amazing with the green dress too. All depends on the OP's decision ... but the shoes would be a must-buy to me whatever she wears!!

i have to admit the thought has crossed my mind @EleanorMc67… I somehow hate the idea of packing either one up and sending it back! 🥹