Do you actually FEEL attractive?

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I do, aged 47F, happily married, mother to a DC in their mid 20s, I full time employed if that makes any difference. Feel more attractive now than I did most of my 30s.

Partly it’s finally becoming comfortable in my skin and knowing what I like to wear and what feels like me, what suits me. But it’s not just clothes and make up, it’s a feeling.

Not that I need to attract anyone, or anyone is attracted other than DH, and maybe it’s a vain thought but it’s still nice.

No because I’m overweight. I was very slim (underweight). at 40 and for the first time in my life, experienced how people treat thin people differently. So not only was I comfortable in my own skin, this was constantly reinforced. As a tall size 14 and a couple of stone at the very most overweight, I am aware how frumpy the weight makes me look. I was happier at this size a few years ago, however the advent of slimming drugs and seeing my normal/overweight friends turn into size 4s makes me seem all the more whale-esque.

Sometimes but mostly not.
When I look in the mirror I think I look ok but then see myself on a picture and hate it.
Overall, I would say no I don't

I never felt very attractive but at the same time was totally happy with how I looked, it's just never been important to be. Most blokes wouldn't give me a second glance and I was fine with that. I'm 48 and am definitely looking older and stouter these days, though that said a young man still chatted me up at drinks the other day, which was flattering! But not something I feel I need in life.

I suppose I do feel just a little sadness that I'm past the age of being 'cute' or having the possibility of being 'sexy' (I know older women can be sexy, but I'm not really one of them!). My husband still finds me attractive though (and me him), which helps.

Yes I do feel attractive.
I don’t know if I actually am!
I’m 49 & probably 3 - 4 stone overweight but luckily have a curvy figure; I just try to dress well & not look in full length mirrors too much.
My hair looks better than it has for years (a lot fell out in 2011 & it’s taken a looong time to regrow properly).
The main reason I feel attractive is that I’m on better medication for my mental illness which means my symptoms have lessened and I just feel a lot more confident in myself now than before.

Thank you for your honest answers. It’s interesting how much of it is in our heads rather than actual appearance.

I do, yes. After 3 kids and pushing 40, I’ve started lifting weights in the past two years and have a figure I never thought was possible. I feel amazing! And I think my husband is very lucky 🤣

@nonmerci99 well done! Please do share about your fitness routine, I am sure it’s not just me who will want to know!

Thank you! Let me be clear, my figure is impressive to me, not necessarily to Joe Bloggs 😂 I swear by Caroline Girvan’s YouTube routines — she has programmes of 6-10 weeks’ duration that are really challenging but so rewarding, and I’ve gotten so strong doing them. I’m on my third one now after dabbling. It’s five days a week. I also take daily protein and creatine when I’m lifting, I love it!

I wouldn’t say attractive, but I feel I look good when I’m well dressed, hair groomed, makeup done.
Then I see a photo of myself, and realise how much I’ve suddenly aged (40s). Not necessarily a bad thing, but it’s quite a shock.

More often I do in summer. But these days, not very much

It really depends.

I am 46. I spend quite a lot of time in the gym, lift weights and lots of jumping, and still feel reasonably perky. I still like my breasts and arms, have a defined waist and arse etc.

I also use retinols and SPF 50 and have a basic skincare routine.

Sometimes, I feel great. My abs feel taut, my skin feels flowy and I walk tall.

Other times, I feel middle aged and fat. Generally it is when I feel less confident or something bad has happened.

I would like to lose a bit of weight but I have come to realise that for me, "feeling fat" means feeling bad emotionally. It's not actually about how I look. It's a hark back to being shouted at by my dad who only likes very slim women or being negged by arsehole blokes in my teens.

Yes I do. I am 40 and have two small children. I always exercised (I also swear by Caroline Girvan), took care of my skin, knew how to apply make-up and developed good understanding of what clothes suit me, but I did not feel particularly attractive in my 20s or 30s even though I definitely got some male attention and I did think I was quite pretty. I think I looked at myself as 'in progress', 'working towards goals', 'working to be the best version of myself' which while motivating to move forward, made me feel like there was always something to improve or add to the routine.

I don't know what changed my mindset to be honest, it wasn't like a lightbulb moment but I did find myself checking myself in a random mirror, expecting to look tired, hair out of place, scruffy clothes, and to my surprise it was the opposite. It gradually dawned on me that I am attractive enough now :).

No. My osteopath and various clients say I look amazing but I don’t feel it at all. I feel like I exist somewhere with any shape. Libido is gone. I’m just a worker bee with some form of female body. Work - Eat - Sleep - Repeat.

I have never really felt attractive but I look at some pictures from a year or more ago and think I look so much better than how I generally feel that I do. I’m 50 now, my hair is grey and very much thinning and am getting some lines and my tiny boobs are droopy, but I’m fit and toned and slim due to years of running and lifting. So maybe I should be easier on myself! It’s so easy to focus on flaws.

44F and yes (parking current bright red alcohol flush) although I'm not sure it's objectively true tbh I just feel on top of my game (I felt absolutely hideous up until 33 so this is nice).

Not at the moment. I don't mind getting older, but I had a surgical menopause 4 years ago and my face aged very quickly. It's taking a bit of getting used to and I'm not quite up to speed with it yet. Thankfully my hair has recovered but my face doesn't seem to be doing much other than dropping fast.

Long story short... no, I don't!!
I am very critical of myself too. I used to think I was ok looking when I was younger and I felt attractive when I used to go out on the town. Although I've always been a little insecure about how I look and how people see me.
I think I look like an old toad these days and I never feel attractive!

I do, because in my head I’m still 28. Then I pass a mirror and think “Oh fuck”

I'm not sure about attractive as in I don't think I attract many people anymore because of my age. But, I think I have the opposite of body dismorphia and sashay around thinking I look great. Until I catch sight of my reflection 😄

I think I have an attractive personality, and as I get older (although I do still care - maybe too much- about my looks), I realise more and more that appearance is the least interesting or important, or indeed attractive, part of a person.

I realise I'm not going to get any better so may as well appreciate the way I look now.

I also look back at when I was 20 and stunning and thought I was an ugly pig. I'm really glad I've got better self esteem now.

Nope.

I used to. But now - my hair is thinning and greying, I have a big scar on my forehead from a recent surgery, my face feels like its dropping all over and looks haggard, and my previously very healthy body is no longer toned or muscular as I've stopped going to the gym (back with a disc issue).

It really feels like I"ve gone downhill since hitting 40 :(

Same.

I have a nice face & people respond positively when I smile at them. My aura is good. But I’m jowly & a bit fatter now. I don’t feel as body-confident. But, when I was young & lovely, I always wanted to be very skinny. So… At least there’s freedom from that now. I could look better, but I don’t look bad!

All my life I’ve heard ‘ you’re pretty, you’re beautiful blah blah blah. I used to get really uncomfortable with such comments. I’d have moments when I’d be in the middle of a conversation without someone and they’d interrupt and say wow you’re so pretty etc. This from both sexes.
Only when I was pregnant with my first did it sink in that I have a beautiful face and an attractive body. Since then, I truly own my looks. It’s a nice feeling. I credit motherhood for this. Forgot to add: I follow zero face care routine. The only thing I do religiously every day after shower is apply body cream all over.