All trousers are weird and terrible now!

[theministerscat]

I really need some new trousers. I haven’t bought any for about 10 years - the last ones I bought were in a Gap shop, which haven’t existed for quite some time now, so really ages ago. Today I bit the bullet and went into town with the express purpose of finding some trousers. I was really determined to - how hard could it be, right? Well, apparently very hard. I went to Uniqlo, Zara, Cos, & Other Stories, Reiss, and John Lewis. Everything was either massive legs, weird horrible fabrics, or both. I’m a 56-year-old woman, size 10-12, used to be reasonably stylish. Can’t believe I could not find one single pair and have the fear that I will never be able to find trousers again. Where the hell else do I look?

@Floisme I hear you!

I think ‘flattering’ for me at my age and stage in life is about finding things to wear that I think look nice but that also feel ‘easy’.

I’m not going to obsess about my supposed imperfections and it makes me genuinely sad when I see women on these boards say things like ‘I can’t wear skirts because of my varicose veins’ or ‘I wear long sleeves even in the heat because I’ve got flabby arms’ or whatever. It’s outrageous that women feel that way about themselves.

But I also don’t want to wear low slung trousers and then feel self conscious about my flabby tum when I know a high waist and good tailoring will slightly soften the look and I’ll be able to go about my day without thinking about it.

To be fair, I’m only anything approaching ‘stylish’ about 50% of the time and revert to leggings, trainers and hoodie on off-duty days. So feel free to ignore my ramblings .

Anyway…sorry for the tangent!

I appreciate that 'dressing for your shape' works for many women, what I don't appreciate is the endless narrative on this board (not specifically this thread or any single poster) that this is the way we should all dress ...
You probably do dress for your shape but do it intuitively.

If I wanted to wear balloon trousers I would regardless of them not suiting my shape. I see some people wearing them and they look great in them.

I don't want the tyranny of forcing myself to wear only 'flattering' clothes in 'my colours', but I will feel a lot better if I feel I look 'pulled together'.
I would wear 'I just rolled out of bed, threw on a boxy tee, massive woolly cardi, low slung creased jeans and some battered New Balance', if I looked effortlessly stylish in a creative way in them, but I think I'd look like a bag lady.

@LemonPoundCake , you seem to contradict yourself but I know what you mean.
I tend to wear long sleeves but it's because I think it looks better. Short sleeves look too casual IMO, and even more so on men. My scraggy arms do affect my choice but I preferred long sleeves decades before I my arms looked scraggy.
I've never really liked sleeveless.

I've got a pair of jeans and they are great but my belly looks enormous in them. I don't wear them. They're high waisted and meant for wearing with a short boxy top. I feel like Humpty Dumpty in them.

I started buying trousers from this brand after a Mumsnet recommendation - they have a bit of stretch so although look like normal trousers and wash well they look smart

https://uk.saintandsofia.com/collections/womens-trousers

I probably am contradicting myself a bit . I wear what I think flatters me, but don’t obsess about it, I suppose.

Style is complex, isn’t it? We obviously DO care what others think, or we would all go around in any old thing…but I am way past the days when I cared if I look ‘attractive’ or if I will be judged for wearing something, iyswim?

I could never wear any old thing and that’s because I’d be self conscious and uncomfortable, not because of what other people might think. I dress for me and, judging from some of the comments on S&B on the things I like, some people must think I look a right old mess. Obviously I don’t think I do and nor do the people who compliment my style. It’s still all about me.

Yes! These are my holy grail.

@LemonPoundCake , I think I know what you mean.
I've been looking at Trousers - Plümo Ltd and I like most of them a lot.
There's not many of them that suit would me.

I'm at an age where I doubt that anyone would notice me. I popped out in a 'slobbing round the house/garden' outfit yesterday and was concerned that I might bump into someone I know.

I could never wear any old thing and that’s because I’d be self conscious and uncomfortable, not because of what other people might think. I dress for me and, judging from some of the comments on S&B on the things I like, some people must think I look a right old mess. Obviously I don’t think I do and nor do the people who compliment my style. It’s still all about me.
Agree. Maybe we should buy a few Nobody's Child dresses.

I think Im probably an 'any old thing' dresser! Not to mean scruffy but Im over 50 and will happily wear the cool and casual styles that are probably designed for a younger audience. Id honestly feel self conscious and uncomfortable trying to do that classy, classic thing that I am constantly feeling shoved towards!
Some more mature ladies are just always going to be boho art teacher types or effortless tomboys. It totally works as a more individual fashion sense IMO.

I get why some styles can seem so wrong though. Personally Im more of a slim(ish) athletic shape so Im happy with most shapes but if you were abit more of an apple or pear shape wearing some styles are just going to make you feel bigger, there no denying it.
(although my favourite trousers as a young teenager were a pair of bright purple harem pants so I think my trouser quirks were set early!LOL).😅

Hmm this is starting to feel a bit like one of those discussions about religion where someone invariably tells me I must believe in God really but I just don’t know it 😬

So I’m going to say what I always say in those situations, which is, ‘Erm OK, if you say so’.

(Edited for crimes against punctuation.)

Style is complex, isn’t it? We obviously DO care what others think, or we would all go around in any old thing…but I am way past the days when I cared if I look ‘attractive’ or if I will be judged for wearing something, iyswim?
I don't dress to look 'attractive', I try to dress in a way that I don't feel self-conscious. It's more to do with not wanting to look uncomfortable in my clothes, like I know that no pockets will annoy me, and I'll look better if I love what I'm wearing, if that makes sense.

The times when I get it wrong is when I wear what I think I should be wearing.
I have a photo somewhere of me wearing a pretty dress to a wedding.
It would have got great responses on here but I looked awful in it.
The colour was wrong for my hair and complexion, the style was lovely but it was puffed sleeves, bodiced and with a full skirt. It would have looked lovely on someone with a pear shape, but I looked wide and busty in it.

I know what you mean. I’m going to try some from online shop Halara as they seem very forgiving and have been recommended a number of times on MN.

Ive found supermarket jeans some of the best Ive ever worn and the most comfortable.

Oliver Bonas?