Black tie June wedding guest in their 50s …. What would you wear??

[sciaticafanatica]

As title says. Been invited to a wedding in June and invite says black tie.
im in my 50’s a size 16 and hate wearing heels.
any suggestions?

Suggestions? Wear something that will be fashionable next summer …

In other words - you don’t need suggestions in October. Just start noticing what’s available and what looks good on other people, and have an idea of how much you’ll want to spend, whether new, pre-owned, in the sales, rented, or even from your wardrobe. You could start browsing runway shows now for Spring / Summer 2026 trends, (and then look for similar things in the winter sales) or you could wait until the new collections arrive in shops early next year.

I don’t understand your reference to heels …

Not a very helpful answer from PP!

OP go with a maxi dress with some sparkle and some wedges.

What do you like to wear? Dresses? Trousers? What colours suit you?

I’d look at what’s available in the run up to Christmas with a view to buying something in the January sales. Black tie generally means long. I’d avoid velvet, but anything else is fine for summer.

John Lewis has 713 size 16 maxi evening dresses that aren’t black or white.

Why so mean? And what don’t you understand about the heels comment?

I’d go floor length OP- it makes the heels easier. Or glamorous trouser suit. I’m totally with you. I’m 60 and actually have never been ok with high heels. What’s your budget?

You don't have to wear heels. Black tie isn't synonymous with "maxi". I have these and are the sort of thing I'd wear. The 2 shorter ones, one of which is below knee lenght and the other mid calf have been worn to multiple black tie events including a wedding. I've never worn higher than 3cm heels but would wear shiny, pointy flats now.

Do you want to be "high fashion"? I am a similar age and similar size to you and I wouldn't. I'd want to be comfortable and relaxed without some massive bow around my neck like in that picture above.

I would probably go for floor length, or midi rather than knee-length. Especially for a wedding. Ovbiously not black or white. Also unless you are someone who regularly attends black tie functions I would not be splashing out loads of money on it either - rental or Vinted definitely. Or wait until the sales. How do you feel about sleeveless? A lot of the dresses in the evening gown or black tie sections don;'t have sleeves. (Personally I prefer a sleeve!)

I really like this one
https://www.hirestreetuk.com/products/nobodys-child-red-floral-jacquard-ruched-sleeve-moira-midi-dress?_pos=27&variant=54963156386171
but maybe a bit casual for black tie but the model is wearing it with flat sandals

or this one, again worn with sandals

https://www.hurrcollective.com/listings/calliandra

I’d go for very formal but I wouldn’t wear floor length/maxi, unless it’s an evening wedding. Black tie for women usually means knee length or longer, though. I agree that it’s a good idea to look again next season, as things will change. It’s mostly winter stuff now.

I am your age and size and also can’t wear heels.
I’d wear a maxi dress with some sparkle in with a bolero type jacket and maybe some glittery sandals or shoes. Have al oak online now as some shops are still selling off their summer collections you may find a bargain..

A pashmina would would work well too.

I wore a full length gowns to the last black tie weddings I went to and I would guess around 3/4 of women guest did at the English one and almost everyone at the Chinese one. I wore a black crepe dress that I bought in Spain with my grandmothers blue silk evening stole and black round toe mid height heels to the English one.

At the other I wore a teal satin dress with a slight mermaid ruffle at the bottom with a Chinese teal silk jacket with a patterned red collar and cuffs and red satin shoes. It was my Chinese side of the family and very dressy. A few wore Cheongsam but my two are too big for me now as when I had them made I was a size bigger. I needed two more outfits as it was a three day affair plus I flew overseas.

www.monsoon.co.uk/amelie-cape-sleeve-chiffon-maxi-dress-blue-20003310142.html

www.johnlewis.com/jolie-moi-chiffon-flutter-sleeve-dress-teal/p113391251

www.johnlewis.com/phase-eight-collection-8-minty-wrap-dress-dark-green/p113010402

www.johnlewis.com/alie-street-sophia-maxi-dress-plum-wine/p112273987

www.debenhams.com/product/roman-sparkle-bead-embellished-maxi-dress_p-fec581fe-0fd3-4e00-bed0-30df19b78c2a?colour=Midnight

Flat sandals
www.modainpelle.com/sandals-c29/flat-sandals-c50/lyddia-gold-porvair-p16112/s90797?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=moda-in-pelle-lyddia-gold-porvair-41-size-uk-8-eu-41-size-uk-8-eu-41-5063333177318&utm_campaign=product%2Blisting%2Bads&cid=GBP&glCurrency=GBP&glCountry=GB&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=16266677969&gbraid=0AAAAADmxl_-DQyyr28FPe34DcqFLsnhzi&gclid=Cj0KCQjwo63HBhCKARIsAHOHV_X5p3CuuecsD-adeI1g0epftbrLQgAzaeJ7t5M5SfQ7MPoCUn_bi9caAv92EALw_wcB

www.office.co.uk/view/product/office_catalog/2,60/5373190007?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22325579703&gbraid=0AAAAAD19QKHpz5IoGRwBLwW7c_-4nsKdK&gclid=Cj0KCQjwo63HBhCKARIsAHOHV_UrPE7pyActhigBhH51ssgrU-kEymU7GOhs0f30Y6lSfcUMSunQ8KgaAgcWEALw_wcB

Flat ballet pumps

www.next.co.uk/style/su538885/aw1582?gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22747670858&gbraid=0AAAAADm_5UUVS3jJ11f1eW7Jej15d2wp7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwo63HBhCKARIsAHOHV_XRs9U4LXMHYkGGhXJe935rIuGxnMwdDltHjOTt7gvAHXSm0VaImawaAuaeEALw_wcB

Low heel shoe
www.jdwilliams.co.uk/shop/p/mf113?optionColour=SILVER&optionSize=9&promo=6202&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=656872052&gbraid=0AAAAADtNp_uDlBKJYX6G3mFpyQxHiuqxP&gclid=Cj0KCQjwo63HBhCKARIsAHOHV_VZFnFwm0kQXUA9JEphT-Pv_p5MfKNECaa-ofg-XmI_gNUm4KMXdrAaAl1lEALw_wcB

The Nobody's Child dress is pretty but it's not black tie. This is the current iteration of the navy dress. It is black tie. Black tie doesn"t only mean maxi
https://pauw.com/en-eu/products/korte-mouwen-midi-jurk-11201301299a240

So far as shoes, loads of brands do dressy, evening flats- Pretty Ballerina and Dune are the ones I know but there are others.

The Monsoon one is lovely but I don't like how the photos are done - there is not one image which shows the whole thing, they are all cut off above the hem!

The plummy/pink colour satin one is lovely - but ouch. 950 euros.

That is a lot to spend on a dress for one occasion if you are not the sort of person who attends a lot of fancy functions. Which is why I asked the OP, or whether rental is a better option.

None of these are black tie appropriate I'm afraid. The second and third ok for cocktail, the first one looks like a daytime dress (although depends on the fabric I suppose)

All very nice btw! Just definitely not black tie.

Black tie means floor length gown and dinner jacket + bow tie. And heels but you can get away with nice flats especially as you can't see them under the gown.

If it's not actual black tie (ie if it's 'black tie optional', or someone is using 'black tie' to mean formal/suits and ties) then you can wear a cocktail dress. Black tie for a daytime wedding (if that's what it is) is a bit odd anyway. Do you know what others are wearing, especially men, are they wearing DJs and bow ties?

This is pretty helpful https://www.vogue.co.uk/article/black-tie-dress-code

I can’t think of a time when it was usual to wear floor length formal for a day time wedding, regardless.

June’s an easy month for a wedding as you can wear a long floaty summer dress. Is it in a marquee (colder) or hotel? I would wait till the summer stock comes in late Feb/March you’ll still have loads of time. I don’t know which area you are so can’t advise re shops.. personally I don’t like buying online.

It’s definitely Black Tie ?
People sometimes use that description without understanding what it means.
It would be odd for a daytime ceremony.

85% polyester for over £800 - diabolical

Black tie means floor length gown and dinner jacket + bow tie. And heels

You can wear that but floor length and heels is optional, many don't.

I've been to loads of black tie dos, industry award dinners and private dos, and now more very formal dinners at private members clubs. Those dresses were entirely appropriate.

@FrodoBiggins It does not. Long is white tie. Black tie is DJ for men and smart evening wear for women and that could be short, mid length, long or even something like silk trousers with an evening top.

@sciaticafanatica DD has been to a number of weddings like this. It means no one changes for the evening do. You start in full bling and go right through. Bride may well have a second dress. For me, as a guest, that would be comfortable shoes too but absolutely not wedges and a beach style floaty dress! That’s not black tie at all. By all means choose a dress that’s long but it must be an evening fabric, so not cotton. Low heels are just fine. If you prefer mid length or a trouser/top combination, that’s also perfect. Black tie means it doesn’t have to be a long dress but it must be something smart for the evening.

Don’t buy in the sales this winter. You need something more suitable for the summer. It could be warm!

Thanks everyone to answer a few questions
The bride does have a second dress
its definitely black tie
The venue is for the reception and things, the wedding will have already taken place.
They have hired a venue in Manchester City centre