Help me not feel like a dick in NE London…

[wheresmymojo]

Hi all,

I’m going out for dinner and then to a gig in Stoke Newington in a couple of weeks on my own.

On my own because I’m separated from STBXDH, most of my friends are married / with kids and I don’t want to sit watching shit TV while life passes me by just because the alternative is going solo sometimes.

However, I don’t know NE London but believe it to be land of hipsters?

I’m more of a 43 year old corporate type. I’d rather not be extra awkward by feeling like I stick out like a sore thumb.

So what can an hourglass size 16-18 wear?

I can’t do round necks / high necks as I have 38H boobs and it just forms one large boob unishelf.

I can’t do boxy, androgynous or oversized styles as I look like a sack of spuds.

I prefer dresses over jeans/trousers but would consider if needed.

I’m just looking for inspo more than anything so budget no issue as I’ll take the inspo and find things in my budget.

I tend to currently wear Mint Velvet, LK Bennett (more for work), Baukjen, and similar.

Thanks in advance for helping me blend in (a bit)…

I have been to a few gigs there and it is very casual, and the crowd are not young hipsters. Jeans and a jacket will be more than ok. I think most importantly wear something you feel comfortable, especially if it is one of your first solo outings. Have a great time!

@abreakplease @Rainallnight I found these after joining a group relating to a festival I was going to: Gig life Crisis and GIG BUDDIES on Facebook (sorry links aren't working)

I just had a listen and he sounds really good. I might come. Let me know if you want to meet, OP. Kids mean DH and I can't get out together often so I'd love more gig buddies.

I went out in Stoke N last year for my birthday. I really couldn't fathom what the fuss was all about. As you say, young cool kids don't really seem to hang out much there.

I’m early 50’s , size 14/16 and living in Hackney/ Stoke Newington for the last 10 yrs. Hionestly - wear what you like and be comfortable. Anything goes - no one is going to be making comment. It’s a really relaxed and friendly vibe. Yes - lots of hipsters but lots of diversity,lots of different styles

Please don’t overthink this, OP. Wear whatever the hell you want, that you feel comfortable in! Seriously, Stokey is not an alien planet.

Not sure why my other post got deleted but yes wear what you like, anything goes in Stokey, the more casual and unusually matched the better, be comfortable so you can dance, and have a great time. If you get there early to get the tacos a PP recommended, maybe also pop into lovely local jewellers, Louise Wade.

Also know Stokey well and as per pp anything goes.
Personally though, I think this look is versatile and easy
https://www.endource.com/product/all-saints-kowlo-dress/We37hMnnfAABvIKY

A simple satin slip dress with a cropped jumper over top - can be worn around the waist if you get hot. Would look good with trainers, boots or pretty much anything.

Thanks for the link just purchased a t shirt and sweat shirt!!

I live in that part of north london & absolutely anything goes. I wouldn’t call it hipster at all, it’s a real mix of people some maybe think they are. I tend to wear jeans flared rather that wide leg as I’m short and look square in wide leg jeans then any kind of top/jacket combo. Definitely don’t get anything new for the bar you’ve mentioned.

Echoing what others have said above about just wear what you like, nobody will take any notice. But I get this is quite unhelpful, so if it is of any help the last time I went out for dinner in N16 I wore a pair on high waisted uniqlo jeans, my birkenstocks & blouse from YMC. I am about the same age as you (and lived there until my finances sent me over the river to South London ;)

My DD is always playing gigs in a city somewhere so I’m now an old hand at middle aged gig wear. She was in Stamford Hill, just up from your venue, a few weeks back. I can confirm no one will care, anything goes. I can’t remember what anyone else was wearing tbh but I’ve decided some well worn jeans, trainers (gold Gola atm) and a band T or sometimes even the dreaded animal print top (I wore a Scamp and Dude one last time, horror of horrors - no one kicked my head in) is fine almost anywhere. Dingwall’s tonight, probably going to wear the same tbh. I do slightly dread if she gets a gig anywhere near Manchester or Liverpool area though because I assume they’re all going to be much better dressed there and I might have to make a bit more of an effort 😁

I would wear a short shirt dress (denim or black) - I have a few Cos ones - with black tights and boots or converse or wide leg culottes and a black top (short sleeve or vest) and take a jumper or jacket. My rationale is that the toilets are often minging and I don't want wide leg jeans or a long skirt touching the floor😁

Jesus wept,it’s stokey not the Met Gala. London! we are all just doing our thing
Getting attitude over what you wear is really more of a townie, or burbs thing
Wear What you want,what’s your usual style?
Go full Kat Slater, literally no one will give a hoot

Oh and here we are at last with the townie burbs crap. It was too much of a good thing for the thread to escape unscathed, I guess.

I’m an hourglass 16-18, and it’s really flattering. The high point of the slant hits at the narrow point on the waist and then leads down to the wide point of the hip and makes all of you look narrower.

Yes? And what’s your issue
it’s an observation and experience, hence it’s relevant . Group of friends we went to see friend who’d relocated to burbs. Literally all weekend we got comments on attire including from the friend . The going out vibe was different and the women looked more done up, more uniform, less edgy

So, yes,we encountered there is a burbs and London difference in attire and going out

Absolutely love this dress. Thank you for posting it! Will have to save up.

My issue is it’s condescending and irritating. You don’t own the ‘style’ high ground just because you’re from London.

point is,in London there’s not a style high ground,There is not heterogeneous style code. It’s too big,too busy for that.
My observation is in towns & burbs there is more of a notion of what goes and style and if one deviates from it there are comments

This might have been true in 1975. It absolutely isn’t now.

Or not unless one is twelve, perhaps.

1975? I will ask my mum about the 70s
well that’s the thing with anecdotes and someone else experience they’re factual and lived experience for that person.
So, yes, we did get comments from the burb folk about our attire