Help me not feel like a dick in NE London…

[wheresmymojo]

Hi all,

I’m going out for dinner and then to a gig in Stoke Newington in a couple of weeks on my own.

On my own because I’m separated from STBXDH, most of my friends are married / with kids and I don’t want to sit watching shit TV while life passes me by just because the alternative is going solo sometimes.

However, I don’t know NE London but believe it to be land of hipsters?

I’m more of a 43 year old corporate type. I’d rather not be extra awkward by feeling like I stick out like a sore thumb.

So what can an hourglass size 16-18 wear?

I can’t do round necks / high necks as I have 38H boobs and it just forms one large boob unishelf.

I can’t do boxy, androgynous or oversized styles as I look like a sack of spuds.

I prefer dresses over jeans/trousers but would consider if needed.

I’m just looking for inspo more than anything so budget no issue as I’ll take the inspo and find things in my budget.

I tend to currently wear Mint Velvet, LK Bennett (more for work), Baukjen, and similar.

Thanks in advance for helping me blend in (a bit)…

I don't know London, the artist or the venue 🤷🏻‍♀️ so feel free to completely ignore me!

But

I do go to a lot of gigs and mainly to see old punk bands from the 70s (who are all in their 80s now!!)

I've seen women of all ages wearing anything from long, floaty floral dresses to mini skirts, fishnets, DMs and ripped t shirts; long, curly hair to mohicans and everthing in between! I generally wear a black dress, black tights and DMs but, tbh, no one cares what anyone else is wearing.

People generally don't. Everyone is there to enjoy a night out with their friends and the music. Just wear what you feel comfotable in. There's not a particular aesthetic you need to aim for.

I definitely wouldn’t wear an expensive silk dress to a gig.

'Inspo' 😆

I’m a corporate type and live next to Stokey. Nobody cares what you’re wearing, and I applaud your gusto to get out there!

My out out uniform is a black t shirt dress, big gold hoop earrings, leopard print trainers and mac lady danger lipstick.

In terms of which black t shirt dress, this is my current fav - www.marksandspencer.com/pure-cotton-midi-drop-waist-t-shirt-dress/p/clp60743530?color=BLACK&extid=ps_ps-pla-pmax_ggl_ww_ch__-UK-_-_bau&cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=20011577753&cq_con=&cq_term=&cq_med=pla&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&cq_plt=gp&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20014443268&gbraid=0AAAAAD7g6bSZFFDqVel6EP9QRxR5b3gRN&gclid=Cj0KCQjwn8XFBhCxARIsAMyH8Bsp7uylKhcEoSk7heZdv2cX2y37kn8BCMapW-x59Rtsx5uwTzXAD6IaAmdREALw_wcB

Agree with this. It’s Nappy Valley now!

Besides, surely the gig will be dark and nobody can see what you’re wearing?

Would love to know more about the solo gig community. I am 52, divorcing and really miss having someone to enjoy gigs with.

I used to live in Stoke Newington and would agree anything goes re what to wear. If it were me, I would wear black barrel trousers/jeans and a tucked in baggy t-shirt and trainers. Maybe a bomber jacket or fluffy cardigan. Accessories probably where you can experiment a bit - some interesting jewellery?

Going to look up that artist too, love me an Irish mullet!

I would wear jeans as a 58 year old hobbit who likes live music. With a nice t and a jacket. Or a jumpsuit

I like these t shirts, and they have nice ways to style them Womens Tshirts – Disko Kids https://share.google/6UDuFpb12CMURYXdV

Chunky trainers or boots and a cross body bag.

But it's indie, no one dresses up too much

You'll be fine in Stokey. Go to the Irish pubs - no one will give a hoot what you're wearing!
Just don't drift down to Dalston. Not because you won't fit in - it's just not as nice!

I'm a similar size and shape to the OP and that would look awful on me. A straight fit on an hourglass just doesn't work, and a 38H bust will not fit in something that only goes up to a size 14.

Also, it'll be ruined the minute someone tries to walk past you holding a pint.

Revolting footwear, the model's wearing, in that picture.

I really like this, how does it fit on you as an hourglass? Worried that slanted waist would do something very weird on hips 10in bigger than my waist (can't wear slanted pockets on skirts/dresses for this reason!)

Another middle aged person here who’d also like to know more about this solo gig community!

OP, I used to live there and as everyone says, you can wear anything you like. I hope you have a lovely time and well done for going. I went to a gig solo last year and was so pleased I did.

Embrace the hourglass! If you already like Mint Velvet, how about their new denim dress or similar?
https://mintvelvet.com/products/indigo-denim-midi-shirt-dress-2
Do you like Joanie, Weekend Doll, Palava- type dresses?
The Waiting Room is a great little venue, not as small as you think when you’re going down the stairs! It has seating round the sides so you can dump bags etc down.
Hope you have a great time!

For dresses: Collectif!

Vintage style, flatters most body types (esp large busts), can be dressed up or down.

I’d wear a flared dress to a gig with a denim jacket and trainers.

That’s the kind of thing I had in mind but didn’t know of them - I do now, thanks! Love this
https://www.collectiflondon.com/products/caterina-denim-swing-dress

Honestly, as a local, you really don’t have to dress up or try and compete with hipsters. They’ve been priced out of Stokey anyways, they’re all in Leyton or Tottenham I hear.

Comfy gig casual is fine, I’ve been in there with denim skirt or jeans/ tshirt combo plenty of times. It’s not dressy. I would just be aware, cos as far as I recall there’s no air-con downstairs and last time I was there it was toasty.

Just listened to Codyy, I would imagine a very chilled and easygoing crowd. Love his voice!

I'd go for a t-shirt dress as others have said with Western cowboy boots. My previous band/gigs outfits have been a shorts style short sleeved jumpsuit and a short sleeved full length jumpsuit with shoes you can walk in easily and glitzy earrings. I'd now wear my silver/pewter Oliver Bonas western cowboy boots with both. I also have an All Saints tiger t-shirt/top which I've worn to gigs and a Saint and Sofia slash necked top which I've worn to gigs. Both with Top Shop black jeans.

You could also do an Eleanor Oliphant style and get a keyhole necked t-shirt/top with flattering black jeans/trousers. For both of those I'd be tempted to go to All Saints.

I'm early 50s, live just up the road from Stokey and go to small venue gigs a lot. I literally just wear whatever. I'm going to see DH's band tonight and I'll probably just keep my WFH-can't-see-my-legs jeans on but swap my top for a T shirt. In a small gig the only people who notice/judge what other people are wearing are the ones who feel insecure in their own choices and are looking to feel reassured they aren't miles out of step with everyone else.

How about this dress with some trainers? www.johnlewis.com/hush-trinny-animal-print-jersey-midi-dress-brown/p113407057

I have a green and black abstract print version of this dress and wore it with some leather metallic Superga pumps to a trendy bar in the East Village, NYC and did not feel out of place.

I’d wear this to a gig - and around stokey generally

have fun!!

https://uk.saintandsofia.com/products/everly-pleated-skirt-black-zebra?variant=40962318958695&country=GB&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=19600928373&gbraid=0AAAAACmVln2iaJ6nihtx4jptVz7I9oPYf&gclid=Cj0KCQjwn8XFBhCxARIsAMyH8BunOqzwbQMXu8_RsulR8x0mD7f5lms4giq8qBR6oHLpMCD9X0GFwYMaAt7lEALw_wcB

The best looking hipster types I have seen lately have been wearing a variation on oversized or man’s shirt with a small pattern or stripe, wide leg trousers in heavy cotton or linen, round toed plimsoll type trainers or sandals. Shirt may also be worn with a pencil skirt