How can I look nice as a size 16?

[UpsetOverWeight]

Please help, I’m going on my first holiday in 8 years and I didn’t manage to lose weight. I feel self-conscious and really upset. I feel like cancelling but this will be my 6 year olds first proper holiday. How can I look nicer as a size 16? My arms and legs are surprisingly skinner as the weight is my stomach, hips and bottom. So I need clothes to fit my stomach - I look pregnant on some days. I don’t have much money so I’m looking at high street shops only, any ideas what I can wear? I can’t wear what I have as I wear the same thing everyday - black leggings and a tunic over them in different colours. I’m so upset with myself for not even trying. I don’t want to ruin this for my kids I really don’t but I feel
so self conscious.

@Seaside3 You look fab, I really like the shorts and cropped top outfit.
I just cannot get shorts right on me, great shame as I wear them a lot as I am a rambler !

Thanks @Karistyleaftea

It's the first time I've worn shorts in years. But I loved it, so thinking I will buy some in the sale. These were linen mix from h and m. They did crease, but I don't mind. Thinking I might try denim too.

For me, the trick has been to go a bit more 'formal' than stretchy, baggy clothes. Even the crop is a shirt, with a collar. It means I look slightly less like a bag lady. It's important to me to find clothes im happy in, given I'm short, fat and 47. I didn't want to continue feeling ashamed about my body.

As a side note, for those who are struggling with what to wear, once you find the right outfit, everyone benefits. My husband will definitely agree he is more attracted to a confident me.

https://www.marksandspencer.com/textured-strappy-midi-cami-relaxed-dress/p/clp60725136?color=BLACK

got this in 2 colours- supremely flattering and cool. Can dress up and down.

I have not RTFT but as a similar shape, I bought a strappy trapeze maxi dress on Amazon this year pre holiday and wore it ALL the time, flip flops during the day and nice gold accessories and sandals for the evening. Can’t link it but just as a search option ☺️

H&M elasticated waist linen trousers, lots of lengths and so comfy.

They go with everything.

Pick up some nice jewellery too.

I really like this and if you have a bra with removable straps you can wear one underneath with just one strap. That’s what I do!

www.nobodyschild.com/products/black-striped-one-shoulder-una-midi-dress

@chipsticksmammy. Ooh thanks for that link- I like lots on here!!

@Seaside3 ha- I’m built just like you and a 16 too - you look fab

Thanks @Crikeyalmighty

Its been a journey, but I'm finally mostly happy and accepting of my body right now.

OP, please try to relax and enjoy your deserved holiday! Honestly nobody is going to be looking at you and judging your body - and if they did, who cares what a total stranger thinks?

I'm 5'1" and also a size 16. I'm 11 stone and in my early 50's. I don't have a stereotypically lovely body but my DH tells me I'm gorgeous and sexy. I just came back from holiday in a southern European country where, on the beach, ALL body types and shapes were represented. I would not, myself, want to wear a bikini but women my age and larger than me were doing so. Plenty of other women were, like me, wearing one-piece swimming costumes that I used to feel a bit frumpy in. I felt freer in my one-piece on those beaches than I have in years! everyone was different, nobody cared.

I always wear dresses as I don't like waistbands. I tend towards flowing linen tents they're fairly elegant as tents go. If you feel like that sort of thing (it's very cool, if you're off somewhere hot) I tend to get my linen tents from eBay and online sellers, by using search terms 'Italy linen lagenlook tulip dress' etc. I also have a few dresses with Empire Line waists which are nice. I find Fat Face is fairly good for my shape and they usually have at least one dress that suits me every year.

I've looked for 'scrappy trapeze dress' on Amazon and can't find anything, but that term comes up with exactly the sort of elegant floaty sundresses that skim over tummies that I love. (The black Anthropologie one that came up on Google is stunning.) Can you really not find your original Amazon dress? I'd love to see it.

When I was a size 32/34 I used to wear a regular one piece costume and go swimming most days, having to walk around on full show through the change rooms and alongside the pool. I also went abroad and walked about on the beach swam in the sea, rode on a jetski and wore skimpy clothes inside the hotel which showed my gigantic thighs and saggy arm batwings.

In all the years, in all the trips, I never once had a nasty remark made about my size. Anyone so facile and shallow to judge you on your size isn't worth taking any notice of, anyway.

To me, size 16 is practically skinny!

For playing in the water with your kid without feeling in show I highly recommend board shorts and a rash guard

Have a look at ‘thelizeditorial’ on insta. Size 16 and not in a ‘carries it all in a beautiful smooth hour glass’ way. She is gorgeous, confident and realistic about what looks best!

One thing I noticed - being a size 14-16 I felt enormous when I was younger but now a lot more women are heavier even in Europe, especially at middle age and beyond.

That sounds a difficult way to live. Do you wear sleeveless at home or none at all?
Could you try to break the cycle, perhaps first just try some on in the shops if you dont wear them at home either. And then go out in a short sleeve or 3/4 sleeve somewhere you dont know anyone if that helps?

I dont get why you are talking about size 32/34 when OP is talking about size 16. Thats several sizes apart.

I'm size 16, tall and curvaceous. Makes me stand out. Doesn't look fat on me

Im going on my 1st holiday as a size 16 after being a size 22 for many many years. I cannot wait. Just be happy in yourself. Be confident. Size 16 is UK average/midsize. I am sure you look fine!

Buy clothes that fit you in whatever style you like and own it!!

A size 16 isn't big at all! Please don't let this spoil your holiday!
(I know you can't help how you feel though)
My top tip is to wear cool, breathable fabrics such as linen and cotton, as you'll feel so much better if you're not all hot & uncomfortable.

@UpsetOverWeight I was reading this thread and @mumsnet added this advert. The woman in the ad looks happy and beautiful and clearly bigger than a size 16. Honestly the only person bothered by your weight is you. Enjoy yourself, wear the damn swimsuit and shorts and enjoy yourself!

I get where the OP is coming from. I too was always slim, then depression, covid, a love affair with the red wine, I went to a size 18 and even thinking about going abroad and wearing beach clothes was out of the question.

Ive never ever ever been happy in a bigger body

Last time I went on a sun holiday I was a size 16 , not that anyone would know I went - not one single photo of me - if DH snapped me without me noticing, I deleted them that night when he slept

Its true that no one is looking at you, no one cares about you, I know that, Ive experienced that - I had a perfectly lovely holiday , I swam in the pool every day , I wore shorts and dresses , had arms and legs on show BUT I DIDNT LIKE MYSELF.

Daughters wedding, I got down to a size 14 - Im in one photo

8 years of my life have been erased because I was not happy with my size

Ive finally got the depression under control and have fallen out of love with the red wine ( I still love it but avoid it ) , and over the past two years have really worked hard getting back to where Im happy with what I see in a photo - Ive even learned how to take a selfie :)

So now I have saggy skin, bat wings and veins and wrinkles - and I dont give one hoot. I went to the pub garden yesterday in shorts and a vest and crocs and didn't give two fiddlers what anyone thought cos I felt great Two years ago Id never have sat out there because I would be wearing clothes that covered me and Id have melted

So Im never going to have a flat belly , Im never going to have the tightness of youth but Im back loving how I look

Some of us never adjust to being larger

Change your frame of reference!!

I started out a size 22-24 with about 300 chins. Now after losing weight I'm a 16 with enormous norks and I feel fabulous.

But on a serious note, at 51, I have also abandoned the idea of looking any particular way. Its a losing battle. Grey hair, wrinkles, folds of flesh, skin blemishes.... i know which direction its going and I intend to enjoy the ride on that train all the way to hell.

😎😎😎

@UpsetOverWeight also if you cant tone it, then tan it (assuming your white!) Enjoy your holiday.