Look old, feel old, help!

[BingoWingoForties]

I am honestly grateful that I've got to the age of 45, I am, I know people who didn't. BUT it's still quite young right?! So why do I feel and really look so old?! I'm perimenopausal with no help yet (waiting to see GP as I have hormonal issues before that) so obviously that is affecting my mood but I feel like I woke up and my hair is thin, my eyelids are droopy, my posture is crap, I have massive eye bags, I have weird discoloured patches coming out in the sun, menopausal acne and I could probably pass for 10 years older at least 😭Ew.
Please be nice and let me know your best tips for feeling glowy and confident. There was a lovely thread on here a while ago for plus size style and it was a joy fest, I need to find it!
I'm loving the gym at the moment and am getting a handle on nutrition but I swear I shouldn't feel this old! And sorry I can't post a picture.

Eating a lot of protein has given me more energy, improved my hair, and helped my muscle strength. Collagen has made a small difference to my skin which I only really noticed when I stopped taking it for a month or so and my skin deflated. Other than that, lots of fruit and veg, a good multivitamin and hrt.

All I can say is I’ve made it to 77 and it’s not that bad. No cosmetic surgery, could do with losing two stone, thin, mousey hair, but few wrinkles, no 11s! Not too jowly.
Perhaps save for a face lift at 50? Lose a bit of weight, get an LED mask, new hair style, trip to dental hygienist, increase water and fruit/veg intake and start using Tretinoin.

HRT is the only thing that has made a difference, a big difference, to me. In the meantime try to drink more water, super conditioner for your hair like hot oil treatment, and get a manicure or massage.

Op I'm going through the same, it's shit isn't it. Hormones control so much so if they go haywire/swing it's no wonder things change.

Have you had thyroid function checked as that can cause dry hair/skin/low mood in hypo.

Only thing I've found that helps is to be a vain arse and up my beauty stuff, so I use less but better quality but more importantly it's the boring old trio of sleep, veg and fruit and exercise.

They don't make me look like 21 again but they make me look like a healthier version of me and make me feel a bit saner, all the best op.

Do you mind me asking, was the difference quite quick and does it take a while to get the levels that work for you right? About to ask about it.

Collagen powder, I use the plant. You can get marine or bovine- ancient and brave or Davinia Taylor the latter is cleaner.
Magnesium - ancient and brave.
Drink water, eat fruit, veg, proteins, grains, pulses, cut meat, cut sugar. Lose a few pounds if you need to. Get hair and nails done. New outfits/accessories. Good SPF and a good facial oil /cream and exfoliator. Bit more exercise if you can.

I use collagen powder daily, spf 50 everyday and vitamin c with ferulic serum. Then skin+Me for the Tretinoin every night. If my skin feels a bit dehydrated I use boots hyaluronic acid sleep mask.

Sleep. Stay hydrated. Protein, veggies, grains, full fats. Not too much sugar (but don't deny yourself or you'll be miserable). Berocca or other multivit. Sauna if there's one available. Good haircut, good colour.

Exercise - strength training, cardio (swimming for me), yoga for flexibility & posture. Weight loss if needed, but strength/toning is key.

Facial oil - I switch between apricot, rosehip, and one of the Haeckels ones. Moisturiser with sunscreen during the day + more sunscreen; good nightcream in the eve. AHA cleanser. Hyaluronic acid. Deep conditioner for hair. Nice shower gel or soap so showering is a treat.

Make-up: thinner skin + losing pigment + melasma = less powders, more glosses, pastes and liquids; less thick foundation, more concealer + bronzer + blush/highlighter + CC cream (Eborian for me).

Haven't tried collagen yet but I plan to; also not quite at HRT yet but suspect that'll happen in the next few years.

Pilates for posture
HRT
Skin and Me or Dermatica prescription

I've put a bit of weight on which is helping me look less haggard, nothing excessive.

Give up the booze. Best thing I ever did for my health. Look after yourself. Take collagen powder for a short while- stir it in your coffee or however you wish to take it, to help your hair/nails etc. you can buy it from Amazon/health shops. Try and incorporate small dietary changes like eating more fibre. I bought Cerave skin care, again from Amazon or Boots. Get a nice hair cut and buy little self care treats each month. Even if it’s just pennies.

I need make up!!! It takes so much longer, I need to do my eyebrows, curl my lashes and tightline my now nonexistent eyes.
I over line my lips slightly.
Concealer, very light powder (By Terry Hyaluronic) and Guerlain bronzer to warm me up.
I cant just bung anything on either, I need a proper thought out outfit.
Sugar makes me puffy, I have very little now, I was definitely addicted!
HRT
Fake tan, love a spray or the St Tropez express tan.
Tanning drops for my face, Tan Luxe.
Good comfortable underwear and shoes, when all that shit hurts, my contorted in pain face ages by 20 years.

Where do you young uns shop for clothes? I caught sight of myself in a White stuff dress when I was in the Apple Store and I looked like a Nana circa 1968.

I’m 50 and honestly i need to put in a lot of effort to look nice. I do tons-
Botox, skin booster injectables, I’ve had an upper blepharoplasty, I lift weights and walk 8000 steps daily, I whiten my teeth, I use microcurrent devices, LED light devices, tretinoin and hydroquinone for glowy skin with no pigmentation, I wear make up every day and like a PP poster think I need more as I get older as my eyebrows and lashes have faded with age, I use minoxidil for my thinning hair, I take HRT and testosterone and I wear fashionable but elegant and not too young clothes. I think nice clothes make a big difference as you get older.
These are just the things that I can think of quickly but I do loads. I enjoy looking after myself and putting effort into my appearance.

Time. Good habits. Time to let the good habits show up in your appearance.

I'm nearly 60. About a decade ago I gave up booze (now drinking, carefully and in moderation, again), took up home workouts that encompassed ballet, pilates, yoga. Monitored my calorie intake on My Fitness Pal. Try to stay around 1500 calories, with lots of protein, if I'm going to drink wine, or eat pudding on special occasions, I build that in to my calorie count.

HRT, including testosterone. They will take this from my cold, dead, untroubled by osteoarthritis fingers.

Added weights (about 2 x 12 kgs dumbbells) into my workout routines. Basically, if you want to avoid falls, and be able to push yourself off the ground if you do fall, you need to start pushing weights and build muscle. I currently have an hour weekly with a PT to focus on strength training (for me, core, glutes, hamstrings, dorsal muscles).

Sleep (don't drink, don't have screens in the bedroom, have a good book/sex instead).

Make-up - I need more of it these days, eyebrows, lip liner, mascara, blusher. Never used to bother with this, now it makes a difference.

Nice haircut.

Clothes that make you feel comfortable and confident. If losing a bit of weight helps, do that.

If it’s any consolation OP, I feel like this and I am 35. Hormones suck!

Can vouch for drinking more water and eating an anti-inflammatory diet and getting good sleep. Plus manicures, and hair cuts, hair treatments from time to time x

😂Would like to know the same.

I shop at Zara, Massimo Dutti, Reiss, H&M, Mango, Sweaty Betty, Lululemon

Thank you

I avoid White Stuff, Boden, Sea Salt, Hobbs and the like these days as i find them frumpy, and stick mainly to Zara for fast fashion and Sezanne for more expensive.

I'm in my early 40s and generally feel great. I feel like I'm 18 in terms of energy levels, health and lack of aches and pains. So far, so good and I'm always aware I don't know what's around the corner.

I:

• drink a lot of water
• eat a high protein, completely clean diet
• take collagen, vit d, vit b, magnesium, cod liver oil, hrt and creatine
• do strength training, cross fit, running, hiking - around 8 hours a week
• have pretty much given up on sharing a bed with my husband, after 20 years of thinking getting disturbed 100 times a night is just something you have to put up with. I'm in the spare room most nights and am sleeping much more soundly
• moisturise at night with castor oil
• have botox
• don't believe age to be a barrier to anything. I'll still go downhill mountain biking and then get a bit tipsy at the pub with DH. I think you can feel more youthful and vital by refusing to become too sensible.

HRT and testosterone.

Facial oil; I've started facial yoga.

Pedicure, even home done.

Exercise (the one I'm bad at) to keep toned.

Haircut.

Wardrobe update; I felt a bit dated but just wearing a belt and tucking things in will help if you are on a budget.

I shop in Me and Em, Sezane, Sweaty Betty, Zara and Mango.

@PCDunnow I shop at Arket, Everlane, Cos, Toast, Tu (barrel jeans!), Uniqlo, Muji, Manners, & Other Stories, Adidas. Have some lovely pieces from LF Markey, Aligne, APC, Ganni, Bimba & Lola, Essentiel Antwerp, but they are spendier.

Also yes to @KPPlumbing on not letting age hold you back - some of the most 'youthful' midlife people are those hammering through life with enthusiasm and excitement, not thinking/saying 'well it's all downhill from here :('

First of all, get on the HRT.
A bit of Botox for your droopy eyelids - I have one droopy lid and well-placed Botox sorts it out.
I also have subtle fillers because I got to 48 and suddenly my mouth turned down like an upside down horseshoe. Fuck that. I go to one of the best plastic surgeons in the business and he stops me looking murderous.
Tretinoin for your skin - I use Dermatica.
NMN supplements for your energy levels - they’re a total lifesaver.
Best hairdresser you can afford. I have a very short pixie because I can’t be arsed battling with my difficult hair, and it’s good because it’s a ‘look’ before I do anything else, if you see what I mean.

Some M&S stuff is good too.
Also COS, Arket (great basics), Frame (T-shirts and jeans) & Good American (jeans!) Skims (basics again), Sezane is nice, they do some lovely blouses and dresses. Hush isn’t too bad. Me+Em is lovely but it’s more on the expensive side, so it depends on your budget.

If wanting to start a new wardrobe / capsule wardrobe, I’d start with very good quality basics. They make ALL the difference e.g. t-shirts (v neck of busty, bodysuits to tuck into jeans & skirts, vest tops, classic white shirt). I think the key is to look classic and high end. Simple, good quality jewellery as well (avoid costume).

I also follow influencers and personal stylists on instagram e.g. Clare Watkins and I love Marine_diet her style is lovely French chic.