What's it like to be beautiful?

[ThisFluentBiscuit]

I was watching a film last night, and I guess I haven't watched one in a while, because I was struck anew by how good-looking all the actors and actresses were.

Which set me thinking: I wonder what it's like to be really good-looking. To wake up each day and just look good. To have gorgeous face staring back at you in the mirror. What's it like? Do you always or mostly feel good and happy? What are the pros and cons?

Speak up if you're gorgeous. Don't be shy! Enquiring minds want to know what it's like to go through life as a stunning person. Am curious.

Not me, but one of my daughters. She s 25 now and she gets hassled by blokes constantly - she just has to step outside the house and it starts. Men openly stare at her, even if she is with me or my husband. If she is with her boyfriend he is constantly told he's "punching", and guys tell her she could do much better and ask her out in front of him.

People also expect her to be extremely capable. She actually has autism and some learning disabilities but some people have always refused to believe it. Her year 6 teacher said to me "I don't believe she is autistic at all" even though we had a diagnosis from camhs!!

She tries to hide when she goes out. She usually wears no make up and joggers, with her hair back in a ponytail. She won't go to many places on her own because of the hassle.

So it's not all fun.

My mum was a real beauty. The most beautiful girl in the town sort of thing. I don't think she really appreciated it tbh and fortunately, she had an amazing personality and was also very clever. I do think she got too much praise as a result and then was very deflated when she got a bit older and a bit less obviously beautiful. But tbf she was still gorgeous, just gorgeous for her age iyswim

Sadly, I take after my dad 😂

I’m drop dead gorgeous. It’s great!

This is what I tell myself anyway

You said don’t be shy, so here goes…not all it’s cracked up to be. A lot of unwanted attention, lots of women disliked me on sight, particularly in my 20’s. I felt a lot of pressure to always look good, and now I’m 49, the attention has definitely lessened and it has felt very freeing. I did enjoy the compliments but only from other women. I always felt very insecure about looking the way I did/do, so I feel more relaxed now I am getting older. Also, I’m really kind, funny and I’ll do anything for anyone, and that’s the sort of shit that doesn’t fade.

What does she look like?

It was great! It's not so nice getting older, when of course it fades. A downside: people tend to think that you're not quite real, if you see what I mean, and so they don't take it so seriously if you have problems. Great upside: it's really easy to persuade people to bend rules for you or do you favours (especially men!)

Sorry to bring such a sad tone to the thread but the most beautiful woman I ever met killed herself at 25. I sometimes think that her astonishing beauty stopped people understanding how much she was suffering. Nobody thought she could have any real problems.

When I was younger, the attention from men (especially really shit men) was overwhelming, plus there was lots of subtle jealousy from a minority of women (I thought that they were friends but they weren't etc). However, although I was aware of a certain power I also knew that it was just about my looks and not me as a person.
Consequently, I'm very comfortable with getting older.
I recently heard a great saying, 'being desired does not mean being valued'.

That's so sad. My mum also died a little prematurely (in her fifties), after battling her own demons (booze, in her case)

Not nice to be anywhere near attractive.

Can't even chill out on a park bench without some creep coming up to you.

I thoroughly enjoyed being 15 to 35. Having people look twice. A chap once handed me his business card as he got off the tube and said I was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

I don't much mind being 64 either. The looks tailed right off when I stopped being able to wear contact lenses.

I was a plain child so inside always felt rather plain. I had no idea I was pretty until I got contact lenses and saw myself in the glass for the first time.

Long blonde hair, blue eyed, slim but with a large chest (natural), pale skin with a rosy tint to my face. A nice woman called me a “classic English rose” once, I don’t know what it meant but it sounded nice.

Its shit. I’ve had men honk their horns at me since I was in primary school uniform.
I’ve men in Egypt try to buy me.
I’ve had men follow me home multiple times.
I’ve had women dislike me instantly.
I had a best friend who told me (on my actual birthday) that we couldn’t be friends anymore because she overheard her boyfriend tell his friend that I was “his perfect type”.

I’m early 30s now with a DD and pregnant with DD2 so I get honked at less 😂
It’s taken me a long time to find a partner who actually liked me, thought I was clever, funny, kind etc.

I'm probably an 8-9/10 so don't know if I qualify, but here's my experience:

• men are absolutely lovely to me. I started a workplace and this random man bought me entirely new work equipment, I later found out he paid for it all out of his own pocket! About £60 in total. Men have run across public transport to pick things I've dropped/give me gifts/asked me out in public. Most male friends I've had have asked me out (even when married) and it makes me feel bad, like I'm to blame and I lead them on
• I feel like my worth is tied up in my looks to some extent. I never go out without makeup on and feel so ugly when I haven't made an effort
• I never feel pretty, and feel shocked sometimes when I look in the mirror and there's a pretty person looking back. I wonder if all attractive people feel like this
• I've been promoted at every job I've ever been in (not sure if this is related to my looks or not)

I'm not unbelievably stunning though, so my experience might not be representative of the truly beautiful!

Not sure I'm beautiful but generically pretty in a catalogue model way. I think it's an advantage tbh & find most people are nice to me. Never experienced much jealousy from other women, always found it easy to make friends. Never had too much harassment from men, was barely ever approached by boys when I was younger. Also beauty is very subjective.

And I was a crap model, didn't last very long so maybe I'm don't fit the criteria 😆😆.

Ok I'll be brave, always been told I had a pretty face but I was overweight most of my adult life. Lost several stone and it was life changing in several ways. People treat you better, are very accommodating and nice, I've had barmen not charge me for drinks, guys offer to buy me drinks, the difference has been very jarring and unsettling. The pressure to keep the weight off is hard and something I'll be battling my whole life. I grew up with a mum who is beautiful and slim, as a teenager my friends who were boys all fancied my mum, Having experienced both sides I can confidently say from my experience, life is easier when you're pretty in certain aspects. I do like what I see in the mirror but the pressure to maintain it, not so much.

Now I'm early 40s (not that that's old) and have children I don't consider myself to be a beauty particularly or just don't see myself that way (and probably dress more "mumsy" etc) but I was often told I was beautiful by men and women in my younger days. In my very younger days I was an ugly duckling - frizzy hair, crooked teeth, but once I had braces and learned to look after my hair I got a lot of attention from about age 16 upwards. It was nice and I was aware of it but I don't miss it now that I don't get the same attention.

Lots of men people tell me I am very attractive. Even now when I am a bit fat!

My mum has lovely cheekbones and i inherited them plus I gave quite nice eyes (hazel). When I was a teenager people used to laugh at my 'Joker' lips but now they seem to be appreciated!

But beauty is in the eye of the beholder so I assume lots of people would also say I am unattractive.

From 11 / 12 and as i went into my teens i thought i was doing something wrong to attract the amount of male attention. Honking wolf whistling ect.

I was more aware of my looks going into my 20s but was v shy. Married v young. Turning heads in rooms/getting chased/hit on even when out with my young DCs made me want the floor to open up. Just hated all the eyes looking always. Was used to a sense of hostility from other women until they got to know me. I just thought that was what women were like.

Embraced it in my late 20s and through my 30s 😃Seriously had a great time. Used it in every way. Played the men.

Looks are fading away now. Still get the occasional surprise chat up. I'm happier and blissfully married (#2) and don't have the want or need in me for the validation anymore. I'm content.
So - like everything else, sometimes it's great sometimes it's not.

My sister was/ still is beautiful and has legs up to her armpits. She’s done modelling but is also clever and got a masters degree. She had lots of boyfriends before she married her millionaire husband. I was always told how lovely looking she was and that was annoying- but at least I wasn’t pestered by loads of men.

Oh and I am 44 and people talk to me everywhere. My friend and husband say I have a friendly face but I am not friendly 😂

A friend of mine was always considered very 'beautiful' as a teen and sadly it's definitely made her place a bit too much value on how she looks. Now approaching middle age she is very, very troubled by any sort of weight gain, fine lines or signs of ageing that she associates with her looks fading. She absolutely views her good looks as an integral part of herself therefore cannot cope with any loss of them.
By contrast I was a very average looking teen. Slim in that youthful way and clear skinned, but never particularly pretty, if anything I feel I have grown into my face a bit as I have aged and am much more comfortable with ageing because I've never relied on good looks.

I had a random spurt of looking good at 30. I was peak health, lost a bunch of weight and had the time and money to really take care of myself.

I absolutely loved it 😂. People were nicer but you did get creepy men leering.

One of the things I loved and really miss is enjoying clothes shopping. I didn't like looking in the mirror until I was about 30 and since having my toddler at 34 I hate it again, but I used to love it, trying stuff on for fun and thinking oh this looks great!

I thought it was fairly good (although women were AWFUL to me) until I turned 30. Now it’s haunting me. All I think about is my looks fading. Every new line in the mirror feels like the end of “me” - the end of any confidence and uniqueness I ever thought I had. I realize now that my looks were my only saving grace from my intense shyness, and now that they’re fading, I fear I’ll fade into oblivion.

Very dramatic, but it’s kind of ruined my relationship with myself.