Tips for Staying Polished After a Lifetime of Laziness?

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I am looking for advice on how to maintain a more polished and put-together appearance after years of being lazy and kind of sloppy.

Ive spent most of my life putting comfort over style, cutting corners on grooming, and generally not putting much effort into my overall presentation. I keep telling myself I’m not in my 40s until I’m 41 and I’m 41 in a couple of weeks and Im at a point where I want to turn things around and develop better habits.

The problem is, every time I try, I end up slipping back into my old ways :( wearing wrinkled clothes, skipping skincare, and neglecting small but important details. I know consistency is key, but I struggle with staying motivated and making it feel natural rather than a chore.

For those of you who have made a similar transition (or have always been effortlessly polished), what are your best tips for:

Keeping up with personal grooming without it feeling like a hassle
Avoiding the ‘ll do it later’ trap when it comes to things like ironing, skincare, or hair care
Developing small daily habits that make a big difference

Id really appreciate any practical advice or routines that have worked for you.

Thanks in advance!

I bet you're naturally pretty. Always happens with naturally pretty women.

I'd book actual skin care, could be a set of 6 skin peels as they really do help, keep to lighter hair colours as they match our skin tone as we get older (assuming you're white though) and get teeth whitening. Also care your hands, soles of your feet and (I hate being this honest but gotta be said) the crack of your bum 😭😂.

Don't do it all at once.

I'm lazy with this stuff as well. And am trying to improve.

So make a list of all the things you think you should be doing. Pick the one you think would make the most difference, or would be easiest to do and get it done.

Once it becomes routine and you don't think about it anymore. Pick the next thing and add that.

When I try to add a whole new regime it fails. But putting some hand cream on every night before bed is easy. Then add in a good lip balm, or face cream, or .....whatever you think you need.

Good luck to us both!

When you have a personal grooming appointment such as a hair appointment, book your next one as you leave.

lay out your clothes the evening before. You can iron as you go but this means you are ironing the evening before not in the morning as you rush.

Do some habit stacking. If you always watch the news in the evening for example, take your make up off and moisturise as you do it. Keep the products you need in the space you will be using them.

Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good. If you miss a day just pick yourself back up and keep going

😂. What are you doing for the crack of your bum????!!

Ha, I waited till I hit 60 :)

A very simple skincare regime for me, because I really CBA with piles of lotions and potions.

And even easier make up - I can do my face in 2 mins for every day, 5 mins if going out

A hair style that suits, one that I can deal with, one that doesn't take hours styling - and a tin of good hair spray

Cos I now spend time looking in a mirror doing a bit of skincare/makeup - I check for the stray chin/top lip hairs and deal with them then and there

I do the washing as soon as I have a load - I do separate washes, and I treat stains. When dried, I fold and put away what can be, and the ironing is allowed to build up for the week when I put something on I want to watch that no-one else will be interested in and go through it in one go

I fold clothes using the Kondo method, so clothes are always neat in the drawers so come out neat , no rummaging. Hung clothes have space , I don't have a rammed wardrobe

I keep a nail file in the car, in my handbag, beside the bed deal with snags as soon as they occur. I keep cuticle oil on the coffee table and I use it whilst sitting watching tv

And because I have both a cat and dog, I don't wear work clothes/ going out clothes in the house, soon as I come home I change and I keep lint rollers in the car and in the lobby

I wouldn't say Im wearing the latest or I look even remotely glamorous , but I look tidy - outside the house ( inside Im sobbing around in joggers or leggings )

This was my NY resolution as I am getting older now & think I need to step up the grooming.
My nails are good so don't need to worry about them, I just use Dior nail glow or similar & occasionally use a coloured polish which I chip pretty much straight away!
I'm upping the hair trims so hair looks healthier. Getting brows & eyelashes tinted regularly as I'm fair. Going to start doing facials again.

If you have Nice Clothes - and don’t pay someone else to look after them - it really does pay to have the best quality tools to maintain them.

A decent clean, well ventilated space to hang or otherwise store garments.

Good wooden hangers with broad shoulders where needed.

Clothes brushes.

A large, wide, sturdy ironing board and a reliable steam iron. Keep your ironing board ready, in a space you’re happy to spend time in. (I find a steamer is fine for travel but doesn’t really replace an iron.)

If possible an up to date washing machine and dryer. And knowledge of which laundry products work best for you and your clothes. Somewhere to dry knitwear flat.

An awareness of how to keep moths away.

Shoe trees. Good shoe brushes and polish. (Old clothes gone to rags make excellent shoe cloths.)

All of this makes it easy to keep on top of maintaining your wardrobe.

Following for tips too.
I saw myself in a toilet mirror and thought I looked awful I don’t like in mirrors usually 😂

I'm just trying to start with my nails and feet. Cuticle oil and hand cream at my desk. File at night. Use nail hardener. I have a manicure and pedicure semi regularly.

Also I get my hair cut every 6 weeks.

I also go to pilates classes that helps with posture.

I also try and smile - so I'm not slipping into a bitchy resting face.

The rest of me is pretty scruffy though.

Some great tips here thank you all.

I too am interested what should be doing with the crack of my bum though @Ruraljapangirly? I have a Hollywood wax every 8 weeks but is there something I’m missing? lol

Go through the clothes in your wardrobe and be honest with yourself in terms of fit and style. If it doesn't suit your lifestyle or you haven't worn it in a year, sell, donate or recycle it. The usual recommendation is to turn your clothes hangers one way, once you've worn something put it back with the hanger turned the other way. At the end of the year see what remains unworn.

Clean and repair anything that needs it. You're more likely to wear something if it looks good rather than a tatty crumpled mess.

When buying new clothes, think of three occasions on which to wear it ( unless it's a once off party or wedding dress). So, rain coat - dog walk, school run and shopping trip. Also think of three other items that you can wear your new item with, that way you don't end up with lone items that don't go with or have a purpose in your wardrobe.

Spend more on items that you wear regularly, the cost per wear is pennies. Look for accessories to update outfits in the sales, good belts, bags and shoes can refresh an outfit.

Check fabric composition and how it fits into your lifestyle. If it can't be machine washed and/or doesn't have appropriate pockets I don't want to know. There's no point in having a wardrobe full of dry clean only items or tricky viscose dresses that might shrink.

Don't keep clothes for a future that may never come. You've spent the money, wear the item.

If you wax you're already doing more than most!

Eyebrows and eye cream are the biggest impact I think.

I try to keep on top of the waxing and I have my nails done but that’s about it.

I’ve booked brows, lashes and a facial. So least the foundations are there lol

Crikey impressed by the regular waxing and nails! I moisturise night and day, check for chin hairs, had my eyebrows micro bladed and when I remember have my eyelashes tinted. I use Jones Road miracle balm for everyday with lipstick and tinted serum plus blusher and eyeshadow for days when I want to be more polished plus lipstick

I have drawers in my bedside cupboard where I keep all of my potions. When I get into bed I put my airpods in and listen to an audio book or podcast while I cleanse, add serums, moisturise, oil my nails, use handcream etc. If I have everything to hand, I do it so this works for me.

I don't iron but I hang and fold my laundry away as soon as its out of the dryer/ off the line. I have a couple of over the door hooks on the inside of my wardrobe to hang clothes I've worn to wear the next day so they aren't scrunched up on the floor.

Simple make up in the morning after washing with soap and using a good day cream. I love a full evening skincare routine (at the moment I'm trialling a face oil and taping routine which is nice) but often too tired before bed so will do it earlier around 8pm and just brush my teeth before bed.

I make my next 2 appts before I leave and have my nails done every 4w, my roots at the hairdressers every 4w. I go to the gym around 5 days a week and after a workout I go to the steam room which is fab for my skin. I make sure my hair is styled every time I wash it.

I started with sleep, water and moisturiser. Then regular haircuts, exercise and changing diet to eat more healthily. I'm now gradually moving from synthetic fabrics to more natural fibres, ditching fleeces for merino, cashmere etc. Not gonna lie, it's a long, tedious process.

Some of you sound so organised. I got up this morning and started deep cleaning the bedroom and having a sort out. I thought if it’s cosy, clean and tydy il feel more organised and want to be neat myself. I now have stuff all over and feel overwhelmed lol. Hopefully it will be worth it when done

I’m very lazy and go through stages of barely washing my face, always go on a mission when I have an event or holiday planned though.

Following for tips and also to find out what I should be doing to my bum hole 🤣

Oh that's me too! I can start a sorting out a job, create chaos and then become so overwhelmed I have to take a break. I might be a bit ADHD as that's an indicator apparently.

Once I've finished it though, I feel calmer and energised by the ease of having things where I'm most likely to use them or put them away properly.

Is it bleaching, @Ruraljapangirly ?

That was a revelation to me when I read about it on here! 😳

I keep my face stuff and cotton wool pads behind the big cushion on the sofa where I sit at night. I haven’t missed since I started doing this as half the time it was just that cba to get it all out. I have a once a month acid peel and my skins looking mighty fine if I do say so myself ☺️

Is it what the what now?! In relation to BUM CRACKS?! Think I might need a lie down from the shock 😳 😂

I have adhd and I think this is part of the problem. I seem to be onto of things for a bit then it slopes off. It’s not that I don’t care because I do and I know I look drab but I don’t have the drive to pick the routine back up.

putting things where you normally sit, hang out etc is a good idea! So you just do it whilst watching tv or sat in bed having a cuppa. I’m going to try this

Great bum crack mystery haha