Help me dress casual

[CheekySwan]

I am 46, I have lost weight and I am hovering at a large 10, small 12. I generally wear skinny jeans and a top or leggings and a baggy top and I am fed up - it's mainly been to hide my weight as I was a large 14.

My sons 25 yr old GF comes round and she always looks so well put together but I don't want to copy her style. I would feel weird.

I just don't know what to wear to be smart casual. I would like some jeans that are not skinny, I would like to wear trainers but I don't want to come across as mutton but, I don't look that old. Are short skirts ok to wear at my age? I think what I'm asking for help with is bringing my look up to date so I can start feeling better about myself and make an effort. I've covered up for so long and I want to show off what I have achieved,,,,,but I don't know where to start.

I am exactly your size and 6 years older. No such thing as mutton. I wear trainers and short skirts and anything I want. and will continue to do so until I die.

Easy smart casual:
Wide leg, bootleg, carrot or barrel jeans, as a change from skinnies. I am currently wearing rib cage Levis but M and S are good too. I'd go to a big shop and try on all the styles.
Wide leg cords. Mine are Cos and Uniqlo.

Slightly more effort
Corduroy or denim dress?
Jumpsuit?
Satin or pleated skirt with a fitted top?

I’m pretty much exactly your size and about a decade and a half older. (And trusting that you will never, ever use that meat phrase again.)

I enjoy experimenting with new colours and proportions - but have swerved most of the labour of thinking about what’s ’in fashion’ by simply only browsing shops that stock fashionable clothes.

There’s an infinity of choice for smart casual clothes - it really depends how much you want to spend.

What would be most ‘you’?

Community Clothing?

Zara?

Plümo?

American Vintage?

Massimo Dutti?

YMC?

Wide leg jeans and logo jumper, nice trainers or mary james or heeled boots, dont forget earrings and a belt if applicable?

Wide leg / barrel / straight leg jeans with a belt H&M or Zara knits with a short jacket/ trench coat. Trainers such as vejas or adidas / leather boots. Look at M&S they have models in nice smart casual outfits and not all 18yr olds. You
will also see short / long skirts put together in outfits.

Congratulations on your weight loss OP. I was the same when I lost weight, I was so used to dressing for my size I’d completely lost my style mojo.

i like a wide leg jean just now with trainers (I’m fond of adidas spezial). Also a cord mini with tights and chunky loafers. Both with jumpers at this time of year. I’m a few years older than you.

Are you on Instagram? Lots of accounts on there to get inspiration. I like wearsmymoney.

Shops wise, my recent purchases have been from Albaray, Sezanne, Hush, Uniqlo, H@M, & other stories, and good old M&S. Worth going in store and trying a few things on - you’ll find hush and Albaray in John Lewis.

Thank you. I will have a look. I used to wear a short skirt and long heeled boot - I'm only 5'3.5" (the half inch is important at this height lol), but I have arthritis in my foot and helux rigidus and i just can't wear a heel anymore

I never wear heels. I wear trainers, flat boots and brogues. Trainers aren't just for the young. In fact nothing is for the young.

High heels have not been in fashion in the UK for several years, @CheekySwan. So your foot is not going to prevent you from looking your best self from now on.

Do any of the brands suggested here hit the mark, do you think?

I have had a quick look, I like the look of some of the stuff on Zara and there are a few pieces on M&S. I was in Tesco the other day and F&F had some lovely stuff in.

I don't have many female friends, and I only have boys at home. I used to go with my mum but she can't really come shopping with me anymore due to health reasons, I'm just a bit lost from being stuck in the leggings/skinnies rut.

I will have a good look at Zara, i've seen some jeans. I just feel frumpy in all my clothes, went through my wardrobe at the weekend and binned/donated loads. I go on website but there is so much to look through

I think perhaps straight leg jeans are an easy step up from skinnies. Wide leg can be a bit too much for some.

Hi OP, huge congratulations on your weight loss.

I am your height - M and S have great jeans in short length. I wear wide leg jeans with trainers and a shorter jumper than with skinny jeans / or I wear boyfriend jeans, rolled at the ankle, with thick-soled ankle boots and an oversized jumper; / or wide leg trousers and a short jumper/top.

I wear jackets from Zara or H and M. My DD and her friends often copy my style, so there is no age limit on clothes.

Could you ask your DS’s girlfriend to go shopping with you? I often run things by my DD if I buy a new style of clothing.

I would advise buying 2 outfits that you like and building from there - so 2 pairs of jeans/trousers; or 1 pair and a skirt; then 2 different jumpers that go with these.

Build from there.

And definitely but trainers; there are loads of threads on the latest styles here, but try them on before you buy; the most popular might not suit your foot.

Enjoy and well done.

I've ordered 2 pairs, and have gotten 20% off my first order, so both pairs delivered for £33:

https://hiccup.com/product/66292604f1d1a77db734153a?skuPrefix=W1000001370B2

hiccup.com/product/66eab312b17886684ff0b45c?skuPrefix=M0568JIK01

If you can afford it, Take yourself into Levi’s store and get fitted properly for a good few pairs of jeans and then possibly buy a few in a few different shades and a black pair. Good jeans are a good place to start. You can dress them up or down whichever way you like. A blouse, a nice jumper. I always find the accessories that make an outfit most of the time anyway so possibly coming into the winter invest in a nice pair of Chelsea boots.

Figure out what your base colours are for example is it navy and cream or is it black and white? Use those to base off the rest of your wardrobe? Keep it simple, but Accessories well, that’s my motto.

Great you’ve taken a step, @CheekySwan.

However, you said I just don't know what to wear to be smart casual.

I’m going to be honest, clothes generally look ‘smart’ because they’re good quality and well made. That inevitably costs money. (And frankly, the older we get, the more we need good quality clothes.)

The two pairs of jeans you’ve bought may well bring you joy, and give you something new to wear, but at those prices they’re not going to help you look ‘smart’ over many seasons. And why two pairs? Why not a pair of cargo trousers or a denim skirt or a cord shirt dress? You really are allowed to try new things.

Seriously, have another look at the places suggested through the thread. See what’s different and affordable. If you find more expensive brands you like, maybe look for them pre-owned. And think of your wardrobe in the longer term - a good skirt now could be added to a piece of excellent knitwear in a few months. That can’t happen if the first item has had to be thrown out by the time you find the second.

I just ordered these 2 pairs because I was not sure if I would like that style of jean so can try and send back, don't have much spare cash but if i like that sort of style I will invest in a decent pair or 2. Plus......I just ordered some Timberland Junky loafers off ASOS for £130 😬plus a burgandy waitcoat top

Why don't you ask your son's girlfriend if she'll do some online shopping with you? You like the way she dresses but don't want to imitate her - maybe she'd be a good help with which stores to look at and what styles would suit you.

Huge congratulations on your weight loss OP!

I would start with a look at H&M, Zara, M&S. I've had some great straight leg jeans from H&M for around £25 - think they're called the crease leg tapered - look good with a turn up.

Try some thin knits that you can tuck in to the jeans. Also how about a pair of coated black trousers? Slightly smarter than jeans. You could wear with a shirt tucked in.

Have a look on instagram for midlife fashion, there's some great accounts on there. WearsMyMoney is a good starting point.

For trainers, anything goes but try Veja, New Balance, Hoff.

You can absolutely wear short skirts! Maybe with a pair of ankle boots / brogues and thick tights.

It's exciting to replace old stuff.

M&S do brilliant leather loafers. Adidas are very popular right now. Fun colours! A pair of chunky Chelsea boots are useful too. Also wear shirts, merino/cashmere pullovers and, this year, a tweed jacket over. Jeans - you might like flares. M&S have some not very flared ones! Wide jeans might make you a bit “square” to look at! Have a few pieces of nice jewellery and a bangle or two. I would look at how models are put together on M&S and copy. A vastly improved clothes offering!

I'd recommend Fat Face Elise jeans which are a wide straight leg and incredibly flattering. They're quite a heavy weight of denim and come in different washes and three lengths. M&S Eva Bootleg jeans are also an excellent fit; very stretchy and soft, also in different washes and leg lengths. I'm a 10/12, aged 60 and I find both of these flattering.
For footwear, flat lace up ankle boots in brown leather will always look good with jeans. They can be just as practical as trainers but look a lot more classy.
If you need tops to wear with nice jeans and boots - Seasalt do sweatshirts that don't look scruffy and Fat Face generally do some lovely cord or checked shirts for autumn/winter.

I find instagram helpful.
I'm 53 but still like fashion.
I like the M&S ' influencer'
I also really like ' Courtney wears'
She's a lot younger than me but I like her smart casual style.

www.instagram.com/courtneywears?igsh=MnljbTI0YWNxYTlo

I'm 53 but still like fashion.

It’s a crying shame that someone on a Style & Beauty thread thought it necessary to write this.

@JadedFilly It is just a saying!!! I’m nearly 70 and I like fashion! So what? I’m no victim and I’m not sad for writing it either. Don’t worrying on my account. Lots of people on mn fashion threads would not know what fashion was if it slapped them in the face. It’s easy to read a magazine like Red and keep
up to date with stylish clothes that suit you. Many of know older or middle aged women who have had a fashion bypass!

@PyreneanAubrie Ive got lace up boots. I find them a faff - give me Chelsea boots please! So much quicker.

Just personal choice @TizerorFizz , Chelsea boots aren't my style. I love my lace-ups, be they long boots or ankle length.

There's fashion and there's style @JadedFilly I think we should make the distinction.
I've never been a follower of fashion as such. For example, I've always worn bootcut jeans because they suit my body shape, so even when skinny jeans were "in" I was in my bootcuts. I wouldn't have a clue what the "fashion" is now and I don't really care but good style never dates. So if we look at classic jean styles like a straight leg or a bootcut (choose one that isn't too wide/flared) we'll still be wearing them in 10/15/20 years. Ditto a casual jacket (be it tweed as suggested by@TizerorFizz or just a plain wool) and a nice pair of boots.

If you have good legs you can certainly wear above the knee skirts but in agreement with @ffsgloria about wearing with thick tights and flat heeled shoes or boots.

I don't follow the influencers because they get freebies so they aren't really relevant when it comes to developing your own sense of style. I do however create mood boards for myself on my laptop; I have folders where I save pictures of coats, dresses, boots - be they high street item or catwalk fashion.