Black tie, covered shoulders

[Magpiesalute]

I’m going to a black tie event where women have to cover their shoulders at dinner. I know…mad in 2024.

Anyway, I’ve found lots of evening dresses I like but none with sleeves/covered shoulders so I’ll have to find something to add to the outfit.

To me, boleros and pashminas just look a bit old fashioned. Has anyone seen any alternatives? Little capes or something but not ones that look dated. It doesn’t have to cover the whole arm, just shoulders.

Help?!

When is the event, what's your dress like, what colour and material. Are arms covered just during the meal but you can take a cover off later for dancing.

Jacket as in blazer type garment. I have a sort of collarless shiny grey thing with one button fastening it goes over a variety of evening dresses successfully. I used to have a midi length evening dress with long sleeves that was useful but that was back when I was a size 8. I also have a sparkly knit coverup that would work for some black tie events but I probably wouldn’t wear it to a very formal one. Regarding pashminas etc., I don’t think I’d count them as covering shoulders at dinner as making them stay on is quite tricky. I saw a nice velvety stretch dress with three quarter sleeves somewhere recently. It wasn’t long but formal enough for a dinner with the right jewellery

I haven’t bought the dress yet but I expect strapless or Bardot style. Shoulders covered only during meal, can take off the covering later on. It’s a military dinner.

What about a Rosa Bloom cape

https://www.rosabloom.com/products/inti-sequin-cape-citrus

Oh wow! Those capes are cool, certainly not frumpy. I’m not sure if they are a bit too out there for this type of do though. Sorry, I’m being a bit hard to please!

I have nothing to wear one of those capes with and no event to attend but may buy one anyway. They're awesome.

Is this too heavy ?

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1079880346/central-chic-faux-fur-winter-wedding

I have this as a lot of Jewish weddings need covered shoulders but black tie. I have a sequinned and net bolero thing, have a look on vinted. Can whip it off after the service but appreciate you can’t do that.

Or there’s a company that sell lace long sleeve crop top things designed to go under skimpy stuff- if the name comes to me I’ll post it. Try googling lace arm cover up.

I knew it was a mess dinner. Most people used to wear something like this when I went to these things.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/375644700302?_ul=GB&var=644568400627&mkevt=1&mkcid=1&mkrid=710-53481-19255-0&campid=5339059258&toolid=10044&customid=CjwKCAjwl6-3BhBWEiwApN6_khGvIACbKwWjJZdOumhukSfy0svULZE-XOfGGD8yiayxmGUcDf7uKBoCQhoQAvD_BwE&gbraid=0AAAAADA7Q_L8mu20sr5_TPQ8ZxiSy0LWt&gclid=CjwKCAjwl6-3BhBWEiwApN6_khGvIACbKwWjJZdOumhukSfy0svULZE-XOfGGD8yiayxmGUcDf7uKBoCQhoQAvD_BwE

Sorry about the humongous link.

When we've been to Black Tie the ladies can bare shoulders when the men remove their jackets .... sometimes they will announce to go ahead if it's hot ect or bit more chilled.
Ooh enjoy I love a black tie and bit of formality x

why?

@mumzof4x its etc

To be honest, I’d tell them to fuck off, wear what you want and wait for somebody to tell you off

Me too. A military dinner is a thing of joy.

Interesting how most people think the women should be able to wear what they want but somehow the army and a military dinner trumps all of this.

What the actual fuck are we on about, that our shoulders can be offensive?

Thanks for the suggestions!
Of course I could wear whatever I wanted, no one would ‘tell me off’ but I can’t get worked up about it TBH, it’s tradition and it’s been that way for ages. I don’t mind covering up a bit, it causes no harm, I’m just looking for inspo on how to without looking frumpy.

But it's nonsense to say wear whatever you want. From work to weddings to funerals to well, just about any formal or semi formal occasion you can't just wear what you want.

But a rule for women?

What is this? Correcting grammar?

OP the ebay ones from Blossom's link look like they'd fit the bill.

In the same context, men aren't baring their shoulders either. I don't think it's too cumbersome to say that attendees should cover shoulders - short sleeves are still allowed.

But a rule for women?

You don't think that at a mess dinner there's also likely to be an (even more stringent) dress code for men?

If that post was intended to correct a typo or spelling mistake then it would probably have been more effective if the correction had not contained a grammatical error and a spelling mistake.

The correction should be "it's etc." - not "its etc"

Of course there is. Mess kit couldn’t be more prescriptive and male civilians are in black tie, essentially all the men are identical.

Id just buy a chiffon coverup, its lightweight, can be kept in your bag and used again. maybehttps://www.jjshouse.com/chiffon-sleeveless-casual-wedding-holiday-cover-ups-shawl-cape-013294265-g294265 something like this, there are others which are a bit more formal looking.