do you 'dress for your shape' i.e. to make some bits look smaller etc

[GoodieMcTwoshoes]

I feel like I should as I'm a bit of an 'English pear' shape at the moment, but there are so many pretty skirts that aren't black/dark.

The 'don't owe anyone pretty' is a hill on which I am prepared to die. I'm all for wearing whatever you like and whatever you feel comfortable in. Life is much more pleasant when I don't have to give any thought to what I am wearing, don't have to tug at hems or be restricted in any way by what I am wearing.

Day by day I don't waste any time on appearances.

However, I've been putting in a bit of effort when buying clothes for years, even decades, so that I really only own things that I at least like to wear. There is nothing else in my wardrobe and I can honestly say I have something I could wear for any event or occasion. Somethings, like tops or T-shirts, I have multiples in the same colour and style.

If I am tempted to buy anything, I consider carefully whether the potential purchase really is better than everything I already own and what I could sell or donate in order to make space for it.

As a child, I was very messy so my parents, especially my mother was often disappointed by my appearance. If we were going out, She would dress me then expect me to 'sit still and not get messy'. I promised myself I would find a better way when I was in charge of my own clothes.

Goodness, that turned a bit serious, sorry about that.

It's kind of hard to hide the fact that I look like I've swallowed a watermelon at the moment. 😁🤰🏻But I'm a pear shape who likes swishy skirts. I'm sad skater skirts aren't very popular anymore, but circle skirts and A line skirts are my favourite things. I hate trousers. I wear t-shirts on my top half, and like wearing deep jewel colours and black.

Slim with long legs! I am envious. Although sorry you are stressed at work x

I am cursed with an enormous dome of a belly, and hide it at all costs. I know I shouldn't, but hate it so much. Would happily have big bum and / or thighs / boobs. Just feel my shape is so odd for a woman in my 30s! But has been that way since I was a little girl. No amount of stomach crunches / weight loss / swimming has made the blindest bit of difference to my actual shape. So I just wear massive, baggy dresses and tunics. Nice colours and prints though.

@FinallyHere Serious is ok, it's interesting, thanks.

@NotSoHotMess24 When I was seven and a half stone my figure was a lot more balanced (if straight up and down.) But being under 9 stone makes me look ancient now I'm in my late 40s.

I think it depends for me TBH. Some days I will try and wear something abit fashionable that makes me look good because that's how I feel.
Yesterday though I was cold and tired so baggy parachute pants and cosy jumper did the trick!

Some things work in my favour though. Like how cross body bags are now a thing....I have always had quite sloping shoulders so never wore my bags any other way!😂

@NotSoHotMess24 Ah thank you, though its rather more scrawny at the moment! Not the best look on a woman inching closer to 40. The really mad period is over now so I should get a few pounds back soon and be back to normal.

I think everyone wants what they haven't got - I used to be hung up on why is my waist/torso so short, I'm weirdly shaped, but I suppose as you get older you realize well, there's literally nothing I can do about my bone structure, so I'll have to make the best of it. I suppose that's the positive side of dressing for your shape - choosing shapes that create a sort of balance or symmetry - whilst the negative side is trying to censor or disguise out of embarassment. I think its generally a good thing that younger women feel less need to do this -though I'm showing my age here, but some of these leggings, I don't know where to look. Nothing to do with size and shape, I just feel like I'm seeing things I'm not supposed to see!

Pale blue really suits me. I have a couple of pale blue dresses and I just feel really good when I wear them. My eyes look bluer, my skin looks brighter, it just works on me.

I have to dress for my shape. I can't even get into skinny jeans so don't bother trying. Find a shop where the fit works and ignore those that don't. For me with narrow hips big bum thick legs: a-line skirts to knee length when my weight is low, floor length otherwise, no hems ending on the wide parts of legs, no elastic waists or bunching over hips, no tiers or splits in long skirts, they must be very loose on legs but good fit on hip, fabric not too lightweight. Trousers must be wide fit. No straps on pumps/court shoes to lengthen legs. Tops on the other hand must be fitted or belted or i visually gain two stone. I think colours are helpful and follow my seasons colour scheme, but more so by the face, you can break the colour rules more on the bottom half if you're not showing leg flesh! Black doesn't suit me especially by my face or pale limbs, I can get away with it on lower half or with a v neck but not on a crew neck, ankle socks or vests. I love bright colours but try to make sure "I'm wearing it, it's not wearing me" which normally means sticking with my seasonal colours including how soft/bright those colours are.

The oversized look is still very in. Unfortunately top to toe, it's not very flattering on the short. On the plus side, I can now buy shirts in XS/S.

My figure sounds v similar to yours. You may find this helpful. It's about dressing for an Apple shape ( in fact the whole website is pretty good ). When I read it, I was nodding a lot as I thought, actually I do most of this anyway! I've just got used to wearing certain styles as I know they work and ignore things that don't even if they're currently in fashion.
https://theconceptwardrobe.com/build-a-wardrobe/apple-body-shape

This thread prompted me to dig out my copy of Trinny and Susannah's 'What not to Wear'. (Yes I've read all their books, I was a huge fan.)

When I look at it now I can't get over the negativity. The title sets the tone so we can't say we weren't warned but the book is literally a list of defects (their word) and how to disguise them.

I was sold on it for quite a long time. I'm slim with totally normal age related sagging and yet at one point I was convinced I had 7 out of the 10 listed defects. I remember jabbering on about how you could see my jowls from outer space and how I couldn't possibly wear that tunic because it would turn my legs into tree trunks.

They didn't have to present it like that. They could have encouraged you to think about which parts of your body you were happy with and given tips on how to show them off. I'd always retained a soft spot for Trinny and Susannah, even though I'd given up on their advice, but this is making me think again.

Wear the pretty skirts, op.

I think most people want to find a middle ground between hating their bodies and letting it all hang out? That's what I believe anyway.

I think dressing to suit my shape is so that I can be more comfortable, as opposed to de/emphasising something, or at least it is in my dictionary. I'm not looking to mate so I'm not attempting to be more alluring, iyswim, but things that gape, pull, bag aren't comfortable because they don't suit my shape.

Exactly. I’m more comfortable when I’m ’dressing for my shape’.

I don't regard wanting your clothes to fit properly and be well made and in the right fabric is dressing for your shape. I think that's - quite rightly - expecting a decent standard of design and construction.

But everyone’s shape is different, so regardless of the design and construction, some things will fit some people better than others. I can’t wear anything that has stitching under the boobs, for the example, as my boobs are proportionally bigger than the rest of me. That doesn’t mean stuff with stitching is designed/made badly, it just doesn’t suit my shape.

I follow quite different rules as an Apple shape to these. Wearing long tops to cover your apple shape tummy isn't flattering. Rather counter-intuitively tighter tops that emphasize your waist are better. I always tuck things in now to create a waist. I follow Melissa Murrell styling as her ideas are excellent. Plus 'Invest in style' on Instagram as she's a similar shape to me.

I can’t wear anything that has stitching under the boobs, for the example, as my boobs are proportionally bigger than the rest of me.
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Yes I understand all that, believe me, I've read the books cover to cover and I watched all the tv shows!

My thighs are disproportionally bigger than the rest of me and my shoulders are disproportionately smaller, and for years I let that dictate how I dress and convinced myself I 'couldn't' wear some beautiful clothes. It didn't make me happy and I don't do it any more.

Yes, I dress for my shape and feel better for it ( including choosing better colours . Ie. Autumn).

However, if you fancy wearing something different, go for it. Sometimes if the shape is right for your body, then you can get away with patterns which may not quite be right. For example I’m not supposed to wear black, but the black tops I have are patterned, which breaks up the blackness.

And the other side of that I guess is that wearing dresses that cut off my boobs half way doesn’t make me happy, so I ‘dress for my shape’, so to speak. It makes me more comfortable, and therefore happier.

Regardless of how the thread has gone, I think you should wear pretty skirts in any colour@GoodieMcTwoshoes . I am newly apple shaped in menopause, but I don't only wear dark colours on my top half as that would be too restrictive. I don't wear Skims either. I attempt to find a balance.

I do and I would have thought most folk on S&B would also, but from some of these posts I’m obviously mistaken 🤣

I can generally tell if a colour or style is unflattering on me and if so I wouldn’t wear it because it wouldn’t make me feel good.

It’s certainly not about ‘owing anyone pretty’ as I absolutely don’t.

Clothes to me are more than just about covering up and being warm.

I wouldn’t wear anything uncomfortable either just because it looked good, although I may have did when I was younger (high pointy heels that killed my feet and jeans I had to lie on the floor to get on with a friends help 🤣)

I do. That's why I don't follow trends as more often than not they will not look good on me.

Yes, use to get depressed about it but you might aswell wear what suits than feel rubbish wearing something that doesnt.

I'm a pear, hips aren't that wide but I have a large stick out butt and small boobs. Live in leggings and long tops which have a waist(or i use a waist belt) or floaty skirts long enough to hide my bum. Skater style summer dresses too. Hate jeans cause they never fit and look awful.