Where to buy a 'decent' bra?

[OMGitsnotgood]

Was in a boutique trying on a dress for a special occasion. Lady in the shop advised me I needed a 'decent bra' to give me more shape. Was a bit taken aback as i thought my trusty M&S bras had served me well!
Now paranoid. I'm a 42DD, which MN keeps telling me isn't big but I do look quite busty.

While I don't like showing too much cleavage, I do like a lowish top and often wear vest tops. Many of the more 'robust' bras I've tried on are too high at the side and in the cup, especially coming into summer.

I much prefer to buy in store but have to accept there aren't many places left, so if online only, they need ti accept returns.

Based on the above, do you have any recommendations for brands/specific bras please? thank you

It may be the way you put on the bra. I have heavy post menopausal breasts. I have to bend forward slightly to get all the tissue in the cups. Then fasten. I'm 34ff and wear 12/14

You can easily need a different size in every bra model and manufacturer. The place to start is either a really good an independent bra fitter or just use the best

Rigby and Peller

take a days holiday and a trip if you need to. It will be totally worth it. They transformed how I felt about my self as a heavy breasted teenager and I have not looked back since.

Did you try any other sizes when the b&b wouldn't initially fit? You possibly couldn't do it up because the cup size was still to small (or the wrong shape) so was pushing boob back into the body, which the band couldn't accommodate.

Many women have boob tissue which can migrate under the arm pit, which people mistake as needing a bigger band. Actually, you need a bigger cup and to "scoop" the breast tissue forward. Much more comfortable.

Chain-wise, Bravissimo are good, if you get someone experienced, as they also measure by eye and explains why they are recommending different sizes. Alternatively a good independent. I've heard good things about Rigby& Pellet too, although never been myself.

Boob and bust is just a starting point, or a guide, as your cup size depends also on the shape. And different cup cuts (plunge, balcony etc) are to accommodate different boob shapes and placement (wide / narrow set etc). For example, I fall out of pretty much every plunge I try as my boobs are narrow set and full in the middle. My sister is fullest at the outside edge and she looks amazing in a plunge.

Also, M&S measure the old fashioned way, when there was no give or stretch in the fabric. That's why they "add 2 inches".

But 80% of the support a bra gives comes from the band, so it's important to get it right. Otherwise you get sore shoulders and your straps dig in. A too big bad = droopy boobs I'm afraid! You are probably used to the feeling of a big band, so the correct size will feel tight at first. But it shouldn't hurt. A new bra will also stretch a bit over the first couple of wears.

Got mine done recently at a local independent. She said feed arms in and drop forward into it, scoop the tissue in (like throwing jelly into a sieve or so it felt !) and then she helped to fasten. Could you fasten a 36 if you were helped or was it totally no go?

Try bravissimo, they usually work for me. They do virtual fittings now if there's not a store near you and it free returns if you buy online so can buy a few sizes or styles to compare.
M&S still use the +4 measuring system which is outdated so your bras are probably not giving you the best support because the underbust band is too loose.
I'm not that busty looking , boobs look an average sort of size. But in bravissimo I'm a 34E/F depending on style! M&S would put me in a 38C which definitely isn't the right size because I've tried.
I'm a size 12/14 on top so about the same as you. I very much doubt you're a 42!

Also try this calculator:

www.abrathatfits.org/calculator.php

I am also broad shouldered with a wide rib cage and it doesn't work for me either.

feed arms in and drop forward into it, scoop the tissue in (like throwing jelly into a sieve or so it felt !) and then she helped to fasten. Could you fasten a 36 if you were helped or was it totally no go?
That's how I put my bras on, definitely makes a difference. No way was 36 going to fit, no matter how much help!

I've been to Bravissimo a couple of times. What they sold me was too uncomfortable to wear. Waste of money.

Maybe I was just unlucky

Oh that's a shame @Mosaic123. If you read through the comments on here a few people have said the right sized bra might feel tight at first, especially if like me you've been used to M&S bigger bands?

We have Bravissimo in our nearest big town so will go there. Looks pricey but not Rigby&Peller pricey!

A rough guide for band size is to add 20-22 to your dress size, so if a size 14 clothes then you could usually expect to be 34-36 band size.

Forget about the cups, if you put your everyday bra on and just fasten the band at your front can you slide a finger underneath, how about two fingers? If you can get your whole fist under it then it's definitely too big. Is it riding up at the back or does it stay horizontal?

Get the band figured out first and then it's much easier to figure out the cup size, ideally wear a plain close-fitting t shirt and then check for any spillage.

Did you loosen the straps? I (34F) sometimes find I can't get a bra anywhere near fastening, then loosen the straps and miraculously it'll do up. I then re adjust the straps until everything's hoisted correctly.

I was disappointed by Rigby and Peller so just sharing my experience in case their quality is no longer what it once was.

I spent quite a bit on 2 bras, two years ago but they've already worn out, the catches broken and even the back strap material has torn.

Perhaps this is me not looking after them properly though (I put them in the washing machine, not handwash, then line-dry). But my impression is that they're more 'occasion' bras than heavy duty day-to-day. Or they're being manufactured more cheaply than they once were.

Have you tried fastening it back to front without the straps up, just the band? It gives you an idea of band then without cups interfering

I'm a 16/18 and wear a 34 which is more then comfortable

Thank you. The band on a 36 was nowhere near fastening, and I did try them back to front too. Maybe I'll try a 38 in a bigger cup and see, will be near a Bravissimo in a couple of weeks, will ask them to measure me to. Am armed with lots of useful advice from this thread which I will take onboard, thank you all

I bought 4 bras in Bravissimo but I’m not impressed with them now I’m wearing them.

I’m a 16/18 and 38ff which fits perfectly if I buy Fantasie bras, a 38g in M&S flexifit.

When you're at Bravissimo ask to try a variety of styles and brands. I don't find their own ones great but like Panache for example so worth taking some time to get one or two that are right for you.

Can anyone recommend a good quality bra brand which lasts for more than two years? I'm prepared to pay!

I’ve had some brilliant bras from Curvy Kate, they did used to offer a virtual bra fitting service but I’m not sure if they still do.

She took me down a band size and up three cup sizes, which I though was insane but she was totally right- and I’ve had plenty of fittings before in supposedly decent places!

https://www.curvykate.com/

Nooooo...... I can't believe you put a R&P bra in the machine! I have never machine washed any bras because I have always needed expensive bras due to size. They usually last 5 years or so.

I couldn't disagree with you more.

I've found Rigby and Peller are equally good for 'sensible' bras as they are for the Daniel lines. The important thing is that their fitters really ard properly testing and can make all the adjustments necessary to the bra, straps and how they are put on to get a really comfortable result with a really great shape.

Couldn't recommend them more highly. They transformed by life as a gauky embarrassed teenager. I've bed. A regular for ohh, over fifty years.

I get fitted once a year at my local lingerie shop. It sounds much racier than it is - its an upstairs in a school uniform shop and the lady that owns it is in her early 60's and has been fitting bra's for years. She doesn't use a tape, but she has a good eye for my baseline band size (I'm a size 18/20 and a 38GG). I'll try couple of styles on, and she has vest tops and shirts that you can try on over it to get an idea of how your clothes sit.

So I would say, have a look online for some local shops, that you might not have even noticed or been aware of before. In terms of brands, I really like Elomi. Not cheap, but great support, comfy and have both full cup and more balconette style bra's so I have different bra's to suit different outfits. Once you know your size, Bra-Stop is good for buying and returns and stock Elomi.

I've had no issues with Elomi, never had a wire pop out or anything and I machine wash them

A bra shop will be your best bet then. Or bravissimo.