Help a basic b*tch out!!

[Gingerpika]

Hello! First time poster and hoping for advice in the clothing department.
Now, from a young age I’ve always been happy wearing trousers, leggings, shorts with a T-shirt. To this day this is what I’m comfortable wearing. I’ve never been one to follow trends or never been ‘out there’ with my style. In fact, my style is basic b*tch 😂
I’m 32 with 2 kids (4&2) - and when I meet with other mums they’re all in these lovely long floaty dresses (in summer) and there’s me in all black leggings and an oversized T-shirt! I’ve been out and tried on these floaty dresses but it’s just not me!! I don’t feel comfortable in them, even if I do look lovely I just don’t feel it!

Please could someone advise me on some alternatives to the floaty dresses and leggings and oversized T-shirts?! Help a sister out 😆

How about swapping the leggings for flared leggings with a light coloured t shirt? Or tucking all your usual tees into wide leg jeans or even black wide leg trousers?

Do you like the dresses and want to wear them? If you're used to black leggings and an oversized top, it would make sense the first time you tried them on you'd feel a bit odd! Honestly they got way more comfortable once I realised that I realised they weren't actually uncomfortable I was just unused to the style.

I felt the same the first time (I was a sweatshirt girl through and through!) but I made the swap the other year and haven't looked back. H&M have some fabulous ones if you want to buy one for a good price to try to wear around the home until you felt comfortable.

If that's not for you I'd really recommend a personal shopping appointment, perhaps John Lewis or similar - they'll get you into all sorts outside of your comfort zone.

It may be down to the colour and cut.

Floral prints and an unstructured look are definitely are not flattering on all types!

There's probably a dress style and colour that suits your look and figure and lifestyle more than what you've tried on.

Have you had your colours done? The idea is "your" colours really suit you, the colours which aren't you make you look terrible!

If you like dark colours and plain cuts, maybe a plain navy dress like this might work better than a long floral dress (I have three of one of these and get a lot of wear of them, they're all very sturdy to wear as well).

That's not an exact example, but finding stuff which is both true to your style/comfort level will probably work better than going for something completely different to "you" you'll never wear again.

I don't like the phrase basic bitch but you can say bitch here, there's no need for the asterisk.

Could you try a floaty top with your leggings, or a midi skirt with your usual T-shirts tucked in? So like a half way point, where you might feel more comfortable

I wonder if you might like jumpsuits and playsuits. They’re a bit more similar to what you are used to wearing, but a bit more “made an effort” than leggings and T.

The great thing about them (and dresses) is it’s all in one so no need to worry about what goes with what.

Midi/maxi skirt and T-shirt
Wide legged cropped and t shirt
These are my summer staples
Plus teva/birkies/saltwater

I've yet to find a maxi dress I love and don't feel OTT in either

Those mountain Warehouse Dresses would be hard no from me.

New look do the best cropped wide legged (more like a culotte really) and midi skirts are more difficult to find but Matalan always have few

It's so breezy wearing a skirt!

Although me and my two colleagues tuned up today two in plain black pleated midi skirt and stripy top and one in a patterned skirt and plain top! Two of use were wearing saltwater or dupes!

If you fancy a dress how about a plain T shirt dress one? Asda have some decent ones.

“Bitch” is still a horrible misogynistic word if you remove some letters. A throwback to the 80s that we should leave in the 80s.

I'm not a lover of floaty dresses, I always feel Molly and Luke I'm trying to be someone I'm not. Leggings, over size tees or over size jumpers are my go too. However I have recently found some cotton tapered trousers that look good with trainers or candles, jumpers, tees or cropped tops. As for jeans, I love the mum style which can be paired with a shirt or top which feels a little more dressy than leggings. As for dresses, shirt dresses with high tops, boots or trainers are a good shout

Glad it's not just me, what an awful thing to call yourself.

I googled basic bitch urban dictionary definition, it's definitely a put down, but/and a key part of the definition is it's a way of saying someone thinks they're better than they come across and I don't think that's what you mean here OP. May be better to start a new thread as you seem to be saying that you are unhappy with your own clothing choices and are curious to find ways of opening that up. I've been there. My previous choices I felt kind of depressed me, they didn't feel like an expression of me and didn't make me feel good. I found my style and it sounds like you're searching for yours, but the thread will potentially be derailed by this choice of description!

I think OP is just joking with BB terminology.
Maybe try jumpsuits or fashionable jeans. M and S do loads of different shapes so worth trying a few on.
Get decent trainers/ sandals and you don't have to make such a big leap. Floral Dresses might not be your thing. They're not for me either but I look pretty good most of the time.

I like a floaty dress every now and then but I also like:

harem trousers with t-shirt tucked in

wide leg trousers (cord, linen or jeans) with button down shirt tucked in

jumpsuits

Just try some and see what you think OP. It’s the only way!

“I think OP is just joking with BB terminology.”

^ This. Jesus. It’s a joke, calm down.

Summer dresses don’t need to be floaty. Maybe something like this?

I’d probably think about what you like about your current style and see if there are aspects you can carry across- so for example the ribbed stripe dress linked above has a sort of sporty vibe which could link in with leggings/T-shirt look and something like a linen shirt worn over the top with the sleeves rolled up might help it feel less figure hugging. I think if you’re not drawn to floaty it’s probably just not you but that doesn’t mean you can wear dresses or be a bit more “put together” within your preferences.

If the OP refers to herself as a bitch, isn't it technically reclaiming the word and therefore not as derogatory as you're making out?

Why do you want to do something that you find uncomfortable?

Also, just say bitch if you want to say bitch.

Another anti long floaty dress person here! I'd look like an escapee from Little House on the prairie in some of those dresses. I tend to wear more fitted dresses in a non floral print or structured fit and flair dresses. Never longer than knee length as it shortens my legs if they're longer. I can't wear midi as they stop at the wrong place on my legs.

But I live in shorts in the summer (I spend winter in jeans or mini skirts with boots). If I want to dress them up a little I switch the converse for flat sandals. I have a couple of really lightweight tops that look good with shorts so switch up the tshirt for those when it's really warm.

This.

But also, don't call yourself a bitch. It's misogynistic language invented by men to demean women. You're not reclaiming it, it should be condemned to history.

I'm looking for flared leggings where do you get yours from?

Aw thank you everyone for the advice, really pleased with what you’ve all recommended! (Wasn’t expecting much response tbh!)
Also, sorry to those that didn’t like the phrase “basic bitch” I never put much thought into how it may cause offence 😬 that was never my intent.

@ThroughTheMirrorEmpire defo trying this! I’m absolutely a leggings girl and have seen a few people wear these and thought they look cute. Thank you!

@thanKyouaIMee I’ve always been a bit of a tomboy if I’m honest. Even as a young girl, my mum struggled getting me in dresses 😅 I do wear them obviously for special occasions but I just feel weird wearing them through the day as a causal outfit 🤦‍♀️

Try a t shirt dress first and see how you go.