I need some sort of intervention

[IRememberWhenThisWasAllFieldsAndCakePunching]

I’ve changed my username and added photos because I’m stuck in a rut and feel like I’m on the cusp of something. I’m 36 but feel old, and look dated (as well as fat and frumpy 😭)

how do I dress more on trend? I don’t want to be trendy but I want to dress not like a receptionist. For context, the orange top is the outfit I wore to a protest folk singer gig. Looking like a school Secretary.

I have very sensitive teeth but could really do with them being whiter - can anyone recommend a toothpaste that would be gentle?

is an eyelash lift worth it?

I really need to lose 3 stone.

…that was one of the worse threats I have ever written! I’m going to start by aiming for 30 different plant based products a week. I did this for six weeks after Christmas and I felt and looked better. My skin is tired, though, and I’m constantly dehydrated.

You look good! You have amazing hair. Also I don’t think you need to lose 3 stone. You are curvy and you suit it.

No advice re style but if you want to bleach your teeth, use sensodyne as an ointment if they are sensitive afterwards and use to brush teeth.

I think you are stunning and you look lovely (I’m early thirties)

You have a lovely figure and an amazing waist - I don’t think you need to lose 3 stone !!

Your hair is lovely too. If you feel dehydrated try to drink more water and maybe try a skin oil after your cleansing routine and before moisturiser (I use one by the ordinary ) you could also add in an acid toner once or twice a week (but make sure to use spf!). I also found that taking supplements (vit c,zinc and an omega one ) helped with skin luminosity (plus glossier futuredew serum too!)

You don’t want to hear this but I think you look amazing! And I don’t think you need to lose weight. I would kill for your hair, your teeth, your look in general and your clothes!!! (Ps the red Colgate- one- does really work!)

Drink more water
Talk to dentist about teeth whitening if you feel you need it.
Bin the orange top if you hate it.
Diet and exercise overhaul if you think it would make you feel better

You have a great shape, hourglass. The black outfit looks best. Dehydration is easy to fix and try exfoliating regularly to brighten your skin and maybe a Vit c serum. You have lovely thick hair and I can’t see an extra 3 stone. Focus on what you do like and feeling good.

Try DR Dent natural teeth whitening strips.

It’s lovely reading all the positive comments, I suffer, and always have done, from low self esteem. I do have an hourglass figure, so I can carry a lot of extra weight before I start to look like a boulder, but I’m weighing in at 103kg at 5’ 7ish. I know BMI isn’t a good guide, but last time I checked it I think it said 10 stone was optimal, but I was 13 stone when I fell pregnant 8 years ago and felt good then!

I don’t mind my hair at all, I generally get ir cut twice a year and coloured once, I had highlights about six weeks ago so it’s looking ok at the moment!

I don’t exfoliate, so I’ll add that to my routine. I say routine, but it involves moisturising in the morning before I put my make up on, and that’s about it 😳 there’s no excuse for not washing my face at night time, so that’s my job today! Wash my face to get my make up before I go to bed, and then moisturise before I get into bed.

You look lovely! As well as your hourglass, it looks like you have a combination of large bust and high waist which can definitely be hard to dress for (I have exactly the same so know the terrain).

On clothes - when was the last time you were fitted for a bra? Having one that fits well and that properly lifts and supports your bust might make you feel loads better, as a starting point. V-neck and boatneck/slash necklines are generally best for a large bust, together with finer fabrics (ie. no chunky knits) and a close fit.

On feeling fashionable: I really like Anna Cascarina for thinking about on-trend silhouettes for curvy bodies. https://www.instagram.com/annacascarina/

I'm the absolute opposite of trendy, so can't help with that because you look just fine to me. But I do have sensitive teeth and use Sensodyne Clinical White which has made a noticeable different to my caffeine / red wine staining.

Do you buy clothes and shoes etc that genuinely makes you feel happy and excited to wear? I think dressing on trend can make you more self-conscious if your opinions on what looks nice doesn't align with what the shops are pumping out.

Goodness me you are gorgeous, not sure I can be any help but just be you as you are, honestly you're lovely. Would wrap round dresses be any good so they don't cut you n half but show off the curves?

You're lovely, OP.

I have removed my make up, cleansed and moisturised! I even remembered to moisturise my hands. Tomorrow is not a glamorous day - I run a cleaning business and will be mucking in tomorrow, but I will do my very best to drink two litres of water. It’s one of my biggest failings. I will routinely go day after day on less than a litre/litre and a half of liquid, then wonder why I have heartburn and a headache…

You are gorgeous! so pretty and a nice figure.

That orange jumper skirt combo is pretty bad though. Bin it and drink more water and you'll be grand!

I think you look good and not like you need to lose weight.
I think you might need a better bra judging by the photo with the orange top. As a fellow hourglass I'd recommend a trip to bravissimo if you haven't been recently.
I'm not really the person to advise on clothes, personal shopping appointment maybe?

Bloody hell, what hope is there for the rest of us, you are BEAUTIFUL!

I’ve just downloaded habit share, and it looks promising, I love a list and I love ticking things off!

start picking up a few fresh pieces of clothing, you’re coming into summer which is easier… start with jeans, sneakers, open shirt over vest… can’t go wrong tbh

It’s a bit of a cliche but I think you’d do well to figure out your “season”. You have gorgeous colouring and as the others say a fab figure. I feel as though nailing the colours that suit you would be a good place to start.

i Went to house of colour and it was a it of an indulgence and expense but it helps focus the mind and makes shopping for every day bits on Vinted etc much easier.

Good point about the colours. I do stick a lot to black and grey, but I remember from my teens that I suit a lot of (what my mum calls) jewel colours. I’d love to have my colours done actually!

I don’t dress in a way that brings me joy, no. I’ve forgotten how, ever since I had my son. I used to wear a lot of dresses, tea dresses I think you’d call them really, but I can’t seem to get back into the vibe. Wrap dresses are also a good call. I definitely need a new bra, this one was from Vinted about three years ago and I’ve lost nearly a stone since I bought it. It doesn’t help that I literally live at the bottom of a mountain though so would have to drive two hours if not more for a bravissimo 😂

I’ve made myself have a cup of herbal tea this morning in the garden, so I feel ahead of the game hydration wise this morning…

Do you like dresses because you look great in the black one?

There are so many lovely dresses in the shops atm so I don't think it would be hard for you to update your look & at 5.7 you could pull off a longer dress!

I just picked 2 from New Look that you would look great in!

Nobody's Child have great dresses that I think would suit you?

Or are you looking for something other than dresses?

And I agree with everyone else you look great!

OMG you're a babe.

I think you look fine and the problem is how you feel, not how you look.

Although, I appreciate you may feel stuck in a rut. You need to feel inspired again . What about a new jacket, bag or shoes to go with your existing items?

I think you are naturally stunning! Great hair, lovely eyes, great curvy figure.

I think a lot of curvy women find it hard to style trendy clothes, it doesn’t help there’s not much representation. But I can totally understand why they don’t always want to lean into their figure and dress like a bombshell. Fashion is about fun and sometimes it’s about wanting to look cool or sleek or something that doesn’t quite flatter you. And I think tbh that’s fine.

I suggest finding and following some women on jnsta or TikTok whose style you admire. Even better if they have a similar figure to yours.

I personally wouldn’t go thinking you must only dress in your seasons colours. I think actually people can pull off so many things that the ‘rules’ inhibit. And tbh I think you look great in that black dress and I can see that grey would really suit you with your eyes. Those are great neutral colours that always look really stylish. Jewel colours can look a bit frumpy in my opinion it reminds me of those sort of fit and flare office dresses people used to wear in the early 2000s. Just my humble opinion! Fine if you like them, but don’t necessarily constrict yourself to a palate based on the seasons thing. I wear black all the time. It’s not one of my colours but I think it’s chic.

Just to add I’m also 36, also would like to whiten my teeth, but also have very sensitive teeth, so I’m interested to see what people say.