Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

Here are some going out tops if that's still a thing

196 replies

Raggammuffin · 27/08/2023 10:43

I've spent my whole life trying not to look scruffy as I'm only 5'1''. The photo attached was like my outfit last night, black jeans though. Bit uptight and dark compared to the floaty whites I saw around me.

Last night I had the slight sense of my outfit being wrong. I'm not usually conscious of that, hello 50s. I was in a bar with a restaurant, a casual place but in an expensive villagey location.. I did notice that a lot of the mostly younger women were wearing cropped tops under oversized clothes it seemed to me. Huge shirts over tanned bodies. I'm 5'1'' though, I'm not fat but not skinny. Anything over sized does nothing for me. Anyway, do any of these tops look good? Put it this way, my daughter never pinches anything.

green shimmery fine knit top

royal blue satin finish v neck top

I like both of these and could imagine reaching for them both a lot when I go out but are they a bit dated? I don't mind looking classic but I don't want to look dated. I never worried about looking dated before, i just trusted that my eye would be turned off, but not so sure now. Btw, it's not like I think all the 30 year old women were dressed in the most flattering way. A lot of them don't look their 'best' imo but there was definitely a look and I felt too dark, too 'fitted'. I don't know, I'm bound to be moving in to the Gerry Webber stage of my life.

Here are some going out tops if that's still a thing
OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
Original poster
Raggammuffin · 27/08/2023 10:45

What i mean is, are the two tops I've linked (which I love) just more of the same or are they a bit better.
Maybe my style is my style and I shouldn't fight it.

OP posts:
Doggymummar · 27/08/2023 10:48

I'm early 5os and these are clothes I would wear on dress down day at work. What events are you looking to dress for?

TenThousandSpoons · 27/08/2023 10:50

I think the two you linked are nicer than the maroon shirt, yes. They are quite “Xmas party top” though. What about a crisp linen shirt? Can be fitted rather than oversized.

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 10:54

I struggle with ‘going out tips’ and also 5ft1. Size 8/10. I like wearing skinny jeans, boots and tops which are fitted. Really struggle between mumsy and too young.
I find the current trend of looser clothes make me look twice my size and scruffy. Would never wear cropped tops, but find a lot of other tops too long.
I don’t dislike the green top, but I think the black trousers they’re with age the top. Likewise I think the blue top is a bit dated as well, sorry!
I like going to Oasis, Mint Velvet, Reiss, All Saints type places for going out tops. Found some nice ones in Ted Baker, Ralph Lauren outlets as well.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 27/08/2023 10:55

I can't help you because I have no style at all but your post made me laugh - I can also see 50 looming ahead, and I will now think of it as my Gerry Weber stage Grin

NatashaDancing · 27/08/2023 10:55

I don't like any of them. I particularly don't like the slightly sparkly/ lurexy/ polyester one in the first post. If I had to wear any of them the only one I would wear would be the plain navy one but only if it was with a voluminous very brightly patterned, skirt.

I'm 64. I don't believe in clothes being "age appropriate" and the idea that at some point you have to reach a "Gary Webber stage" ( had to Google that, in my case that stage will be "never") and I'm not keen on clothes being dull, and those , to my eyes are very dull.

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 10:56

I also think it’s about finding clothes that suit your shape. I think a lot of clothes now are viscose and polyester and I hate those. Linen, cotton and satin look so much better.

Cyclingmug · 27/08/2023 10:57

They are so dull

LaviniasBigBloomers · 27/08/2023 10:59

I'm 52 and also small, I don't think I ever look particularly scruffy though!

The young are wearing crop tops (which my menopausal belly will not allow!) and layers as you saw last night, what I'm doing atm is copying the layering but changing the base layer. So I was out-out yesterday in cropped cigarette jeans, trainers (not white!), a vest top which was fitted and - crucially - tucked in, which is my version of the crop top, then with a blue and white oversized shirt over the top, unbuttoned and untucked. I felt good and that it was an age-and-belly-appropriate version of what the 20somethings were wearing.

Right jean fit/length is crucial but you know that already being wee!

Those tops aren't great, the shimmery one is Christmas night out-y and while I like the cut of the second one, it's more work appropriate rather than going out. Although it might balance flared jeans - I haven't gone there yet, again, that's a height thing - if that was something you wanted to try.

ErosandAgape · 27/08/2023 11:01

I would wear the blue v-necked top to work, with wide-legged trousers or culottes and biker boots, and heavy silver jewellery — but then I don’t think I have ‘going out tops’ as a concept — unless it was a formal thing, I tend to wear the same kind of outfit to work and to go out in the evenings. I’m 51.

As a pp said, what kind of night out are you talking about?

RandomersAssociation · 27/08/2023 11:01

Maybe you need to reframe your feelings …

You say you’ve spent your life trying not to look scruffy as you’re only 5’1. What on earth does this mean, unless scruffy means something different to you than it does to me? I’ve never in my life equated any particular height with a predisposition to scruffiness! Why do you?

And there is no reason whatsoever why someone of 5’1 should not wear an oversized jacket, or whatever. Sometimes wearing clothes that show you’re aware of current trends is more flattering than wearing something conventionally ‘attractive’.

I’m quite a bit older than you and wouldn’t pick the tops you’ve linked. To me they look hopelessly dated, and not in very nice fabrics. You may live another 50 years - why not embrace the contemporary, with a more open and relaxed attitude?

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 11:02

Good idea about wearing a vest under a looser shirt, to avoid crop tops!

ErosandAgape · 27/08/2023 11:03

LaviniasBigBloomers · 27/08/2023 10:59

I'm 52 and also small, I don't think I ever look particularly scruffy though!

The young are wearing crop tops (which my menopausal belly will not allow!) and layers as you saw last night, what I'm doing atm is copying the layering but changing the base layer. So I was out-out yesterday in cropped cigarette jeans, trainers (not white!), a vest top which was fitted and - crucially - tucked in, which is my version of the crop top, then with a blue and white oversized shirt over the top, unbuttoned and untucked. I felt good and that it was an age-and-belly-appropriate version of what the 20somethings were wearing.

Right jean fit/length is crucial but you know that already being wee!

Those tops aren't great, the shimmery one is Christmas night out-y and while I like the cut of the second one, it's more work appropriate rather than going out. Although it might balance flared jeans - I haven't gone there yet, again, that's a height thing - if that was something you wanted to try.

Yes, that’s what I think about the blue v-neck — I would wear it with something oversized and slouchy on my lower half. I appreciate that may not work on someone who is five inches shorter than I am, though.

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 11:05

RandomersAssociation · 27/08/2023 11:01

Maybe you need to reframe your feelings …

You say you’ve spent your life trying not to look scruffy as you’re only 5’1. What on earth does this mean, unless scruffy means something different to you than it does to me? I’ve never in my life equated any particular height with a predisposition to scruffiness! Why do you?

And there is no reason whatsoever why someone of 5’1 should not wear an oversized jacket, or whatever. Sometimes wearing clothes that show you’re aware of current trends is more flattering than wearing something conventionally ‘attractive’.

I’m quite a bit older than you and wouldn’t pick the tops you’ve linked. To me they look hopelessly dated, and not in very nice fabrics. You may live another 50 years - why not embrace the contemporary, with a more open and relaxed attitude?

Boxy tops, oversized jumpers etc look so ridiculous on my 5ft1 frame! Though I think short boxy jumpers look good with vest underneath.
I think fitted around waist (not cropped) and high waisted with more form fitting tops are more flattering on us vertically challenged!
I have tried some clothes on that just look like I’ve thrown on a tent (and so scruffy!) and drown me.

caringcarer · 27/08/2023 11:07

The second V neck one is very similar to a top I have. I'm only 5 foot so maybe it is preferred by shorter women. I like a fitted top because big baggy things swamp me. I think you get people are wearing bright colours this summer. I like to wear cream or navy tops but I did give in the bright colours and bought a burnt orange colour top. I tend to wear black or navy trousers. I do have some dresses with a bit more colour.

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 11:08

I’m also desperately trying to find some wide legged petite trousers that fit well around waist to wear with trainers. Sorry I’ve taken this thread down a petite rabbit hole of issues!

Original poster
Raggammuffin · 27/08/2023 11:11

Great replies, thank you, btw, it's not that I have a complex about being 5;1''
it's just an awareness that big voluminous clothes do nothing for me. I think they look great on some other people though.

Agree @sheeplikessleep , crop tops with a vest underneath, in a colour that matches the high waisted trousers/jeans can work well on my short body. I should fear the crop less.

OP posts:
LaviniasBigBloomers · 27/08/2023 11:12

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 11:08

I’m also desperately trying to find some wide legged petite trousers that fit well around waist to wear with trainers. Sorry I’ve taken this thread down a petite rabbit hole of issues!

M and S best for petite trousers that are cut to size rather than just shortened. You have to kiss a lot of frogs on any M&S trip of course, but they are in there. Next also cut properly for their petite sizes but lord, Next is so frumpy rn and they don't seem to carry as much petite stuff in-store (trying on obviously important for us short arses!).

I've had luck with Saint and Sofia for softer, more lounge style pants, but it's a bit hit and miss. The narrow yoga style pants were great but their flared ones had a lot of excess material around the waist to crotch length (see above about petite not just meaning a shorter leg) they basically look like I'm wearing a nappy when I sit down, but I work from home and value comfort more in that situation.

sheeplikessleep · 27/08/2023 11:15

Great ideas of where to look - thanks

Farmageddon · 27/08/2023 11:15

To be honest OP they all look like work clothes, not something I would choose to go out to dinner in.

With dark jeans, you could try injecting some colour and pattern to lift it a bit, and you can bolder I think.

What sort of colouring do you have? Do you prefer long or short sleeves?

Here's some examples of tops that would nicely offset black jeans:

https://mintvelvet.com/en-ie/products/esme-print-longline-blouse

https://mintvelvet.com/en-ie/products/red-tie-neck-gathered-blouse

https://mintvelvet.com/en-ie/products/red-tie-neck-gathered-blouse

https://mintvelvet.com/en-ie/products/green-print-jacquard-top

Shinyandnew1 · 27/08/2023 11:17

I've spent my whole life trying not to look scruffy as I'm only 5'1''

What has being 5 foot 1 got to do with being scruffy-I don’t get this at all?!

Gowlett · 27/08/2023 11:17

I found a gorgeous sequined one-shoulder black / gold top in TK Maxx yesterday. My young, skinny self would have bought it (and not have the confidence to wear it). I put it back, even though I loved it… I don’t think I can wear this kind of thing anymore. But, I’m not ready for Gerry Weber!

Original poster
Raggammuffin · 27/08/2023 11:17

@LaviniasBigBloomers yes, think I'll look out for a few vests to match the trousers or the 'trouser' as they say now. So that way you still get the high waist crop top look without your belly giving a cabaret to the people around you.

What kind of thing might you wear @NatashaDancing if you were going out for dinner in a casual but popular place.

OP posts:
Ahnobother · 27/08/2023 11:18

Also short here and struggling with the oversized look - more around the fit of trousers which are too wide legged for me.
I bought a couple of nice oversized silk / viscose shirts and wear those with a vest top underneath.
Gerry Weber era made me laugh - I found myself covering a lovely mid calf length wool coat that a friend of mine bought last winter. Tried it on and it was ankle length on me. So frustrating.

My real struggle is with shoes. I have small but wide feet and I cannot escape the feeling that everything looks like a brick on my feet. I wish I was a gazelle.

Original poster
Raggammuffin · 27/08/2023 11:19

Shinyandnew1 · 27/08/2023 11:17

I've spent my whole life trying not to look scruffy as I'm only 5'1''

What has being 5 foot 1 got to do with being scruffy-I don’t get this at all?!

I do think you need to work harder to look good when you're short. Somebody of 5'5 just throws on an outfit and it works - they look great, stylish, breezy, elegant. I throw on the same outfit and it might look breezy alright, but not the other two.

OP posts: