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Original poster

Do people still think wearing red at weddings is dodgy?

55 replies

fatherfintanstack · 14/08/2023 08:48

I've just seen on another thread that wearing red to a wedding means you've slept with the groom traditionally. Is this still a thing?

I've bought a long red/ pinkish boho style dress for my cousin's wedding (cousin is the bride). Planning to wear with flat sandals.

I've never met the geezer so definitely no hidden messages but don't know how traditional his family are/ are not.

I don't want to look like a trouble maker or attention seeker! My cousin has specified that she wants an informal wedding in terms of dress etc.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Asiatoyork · 15/08/2023 09:59

How do people know the colour of the bridesmaid dresses to make sure they don’t wear the same? Do people check in advance? I have never done this.

Wfhandbored · 15/08/2023 10:04

Lol I wore red to my brothers wedding recently so I hope no mental inferences were made there

bingohandjob · 15/08/2023 10:10

The only opinion I would take on this would be the couple getting married. If they're happy with it, go for it. I know some get very fixed on a theme/colour palette so a courtesy check might be appreciated.

LadyEloise1 · 15/08/2023 10:13

doroda · 14/08/2023 08:50

I've never heard of this.

Me neither.
It's daft 🙄

EmmaPaella · 15/08/2023 10:16

bingohandjob · 15/08/2023 10:10

The only opinion I would take on this would be the couple getting married. If they're happy with it, go for it. I know some get very fixed on a theme/colour palette so a courtesy check might be appreciated.

I would never check a colour palette with a bride.

EmmaPaella · 15/08/2023 10:17

I have never heard of the red ‘tradition’, which sounds like a very strange tradition to me. Nor did I know that wearing green is traditionally for Irish weddings. Mumsnet is such a learning curve.

GreenCereal · 15/08/2023 10:20

As long as you don’t show up looking like Scarlett O’Hara I think you’ll be fine.

Do people still think wearing red at weddings is dodgy?
Inmybirthdaysuit · 15/08/2023 10:22

I was at a wedding recently and someone was wearing a red silky, skin tight Jessica Rabbit type dress with lots and lots of cleavage on show.. That seemed a bit much and did stand out but I think it was more the style of the red dress rather than the fact it was red.

Justyouwaitandseeagain · 15/08/2023 10:24

I agree with above posters. I would generally recommend avoiding bright red, solid colour dresses for a traditional UK daytime wedding. Especially tight, showy or satin or teamed with black PVC. (Unless there is a specific theme or dress code). I think most red dresses would be fine.

MaryMagda · 15/08/2023 10:27

Wear whatever you like, I've never met a bride who gives a shit what anyone else is wearing. These "traditions" are only for those who need them.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/08/2023 10:32

PuttingDownRoots · 14/08/2023 08:53

What are you allowed to wear to a wedding? 😂
No black
No white
No green
No red
Not too bridesmaid like
No upstanding the brides mother
Not too formal
Not too casual

Is there just one approved outfit?

You forgot

Similar colours to the wedding party
Not similar colours to the wedding party
Bright colours
Pastel colours
Shoulders exposed
Shoulders not exposed
Too short
Too long
Too formal
Too casual
Too boring
Too exciting
Trousers/trouser suits

Basically, if you are female and attending a wedding, chances are that somebody somewhere will take offence to what you're wearing if they want to.

TwoItalianApples · 15/08/2023 10:35

I went to a Hindu wedding and was asked nicely not to wear red (I'm not Hindu) as that's a traditional bridal colour? That's the only time it's come up.

SnapdragonToadflax · 15/08/2023 10:39

MN doesn't allow anything except pastel florals for weddings.

In the real world, no-one cares. So long as you don't look like you could be the bride yourself, you're not dressed like you're going out clubbing or to a funeral, you'll be fine.

countrygirl99 · 15/08/2023 10:42

The only time I've heard anyone comment about an outfit a wedding guest was wearing waswhen someone wore a scrap of bright orange fabric that looked like some sort of bondage outfit.

Yesabsolutely · 15/08/2023 10:44

My bridesmaids all wore red …never heard of such rubbish!

bingohandjob · 15/08/2023 10:46

Each to their own - if they clearly had a preference, or if I was unsure if they did, personally, I would out of courtesy. If they had made it very clear they didn't care, I wouldn't. Weddings (and funerals) bring out all kinds of expectations about attire and behaviour - a quick courtesy check if you're worried at all (as I'm assuming the OP is, or they wouldn't be asking) might ease that.

GrumpyOldCrone · 15/08/2023 11:08

Yes, me. I think it’s better to avoid wearing red (or white, or black) to a wedding. I wouldn’t judge anyone negatively for it, or say anything about it. But I’d definitely notice. I accept that this is very old fashioned of me.

TizerorFizz · 15/08/2023 11:13

Red is ok. Really depends on the outfit. White or black are not right. Tight dresses are clubbing gear and dated.

TizerorFizz · 15/08/2023 11:18

So if a guest turned up looking like Kate in these pix, someone would object? Of course they wouldn’t.

Do people still think wearing red at weddings is dodgy?
Do people still think wearing red at weddings is dodgy?
Katiepoes · 15/08/2023 11:26

I'm Irish and have never heard that green is not on - my bridesmaid wore green. Is this some tiny local tradition that has somehow become a Mumsnet rule?

As for asking the bride...seriously? Not as though she'll have enough other stupid things to worry about (mainly relatives not RSVPing if it's a proper Irish wedding😁).

I admit I read these threads to marvel at the angst from people over 'rules', no wonder weddings cause so much stress.

verdantverdure · 15/08/2023 11:36

We drove past a wedding in a beautiful old church last summer where the groom and his groomsmen were in shiny teal green suits and the younger women in the sort of short tight bodycon dresses I might have worn clubbing once upon a time and spent the night tugging down.

I've never heard the green or the red rule.

TizerorFizz · 15/08/2023 14:55

That’s because there isn’t one.

JulesJules · 20/08/2023 07:34

I've never heard of this, but even if I had I wouldn't take any notice. I wore green at my own wedding (dark green velvet) which is supposed to be unlucky (something Lady Macbeth something something?) but I'm still married 29 years later.

NickyT64 · 20/08/2023 22:43

fatherfintanstack · 14/08/2023 08:48

I've just seen on another thread that wearing red to a wedding means you've slept with the groom traditionally. Is this still a thing?

I've bought a long red/ pinkish boho style dress for my cousin's wedding (cousin is the bride). Planning to wear with flat sandals.

I've never met the geezer so definitely no hidden messages but don't know how traditional his family are/ are not.

I don't want to look like a trouble maker or attention seeker! My cousin has specified that she wants an informal wedding in terms of dress etc.

Whaaaaaaaat????????????? (she said frantically searching memory of every single wedding outfit ever worn……….!!!)

EllaMenopee · 20/08/2023 22:50

I wore red to one wedding. I had slept with the groom. And was the one getting married to him.