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Original poster

What to wear for mum's funeral?

36 replies

jclm · 11/06/2023 09:32

My darling mum died. I need a black summer dress plus ideas for bag and shoes for the funeral. My budget is £150 for all (I may already have suitable shoes/sandals).

It is important to me that I will reuse the dress so I'm looking for something quite casual (I don't wear formal dress for work)

OP posts:
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DisplayPurposesOnly · 11/06/2023 09:39

I'm sorry about your mum.

My dad's funeral was on a very hot & sunny day. This meant lots of people wore black & white, navy & white, grey & white. It looked good.

So, don't feel you have to restrict yourself to black (unless you particularly like black anyway), especially if that helps you find something you can re-wear.

Original poster
jclm · 11/06/2023 09:41

Thanks.
I should add that I adore linen and cotton.

OP posts:
Mumdiva99 · 11/06/2023 09:43

So sorry for your loss.

Instead of buying something could you wear your mum's favourite outfit of yours? Is there something she complimented you on? I know this doesn't suit everyone, but just a different thought.

HipHipWhoRay · 11/06/2023 09:45

I’m so sorry to hear that. I had similar hot summer funeral for dad, and bought a whistles navy jump suit. It’s lovely but everytime I have worn it since, sends me back to the funeral, and so now it’s not worn often as I feel a bit sad when. I put it on, but I also don’t feel I can give it away either. So my advice would be to not spend much on it as might not get much wear.

Sending you strength for the next weeks and months. I miss my dad so much, but 4 years later time has made it easier to manage.

Abra1t · 11/06/2023 09:53

I didn’t wear head to toe black for my father’s funeral. It is actually fairly rare now too see that (sadly I have been to a lot of funerals, for people of ages from 50 to 97).

I bought an L K Bennett patterned black and grey dress on Vinted and resold it after.

Condolences on your loss.

Hoppinggreen · 11/06/2023 09:55

I’m sorry about your Mum.
My Mum died in March and I wore a black sweater dress and ankle boots with a scarf of hers around my neck in a bright colour. We suggested everyone wear colour if they wanted to
How about a black linen shift dress or similar?

GulesMeansRed · 11/06/2023 09:58

I bought this dress for my dad's funeral in April.

https://www.laredoute.co.uk/ppdp/prod-350155088.aspx#searchkeyword=f5962412

It's the sort of dress I can imagine wearing for other occasions too and was very comfortable to wear all day

RoseBucket · 11/06/2023 10:06

https://www.debenhams.com/product/boohoo-cotton-rouched-front-midi-shirt-dress_fzz36855?colour=black

Sorry for your loss. I hope you have some support.

Cantonet · 11/06/2023 10:24

This maybe?
M&S linen mix slip dress. Can be worn casually or dressed up with a blazer or shirt over. I have the green & it's a great shape to wear.

What to wear for mum's funeral?
paradoxicalfrog · 11/06/2023 10:36

I don't do dresses. For my mother's funeral, I wore a black skirt which I already had with a new black top, black cardigan and black ankle boots. My mother loved the colour red and red poppies. I found a scarf on eBay with large red poppies on a black background and we suggested others wore something red, in memory of my mother. A few did wear a touch of red, or a red jacket. I've worn all the items separately since.

paradoxicalfrog · 11/06/2023 10:37

I'm sorry for your loss jclm.

FiveShelties · 11/06/2023 11:20

My Mum died last month and I really struggled with what to wear. Mum hated black but I wondered if people would think it was odd if I did not wear black, so I did decide to go with black. After the funeral I realised no-one could have cared less what I was wearing and perhaps I should have worn pink or lemon!

I am sorry for your loss and I would wear whatever you feel is right for you.

Selfesteem22 · 11/06/2023 14:10

Neither me or my mum wore entire black from my dad's funeral - my mum wore a cream and blue dress and I work a flowery dress with some play in it and a black jacket

londondinnerout · 11/06/2023 15:06

I had this problem a couple of years back, all my hot weather stuff is very bright. I looked on John Lewis website, with filters on for Black and Cotton and Linen. Found many opt! Here's one or two that I found just now

I found this at John Lewis & Partners. What do you think?  https://www.johnlewis.com/nobodys-child-boutique-collection-nora-broderie-anglaise-dress/p110184196?tmad=c&tmcampid=7&sshare=jlappioss_Y29tLmFwcGxlLlVJS2l0LmFjdGl2aXR5LkNvcHlUb1Bhc3RlYm9hcmQ=

legrandcolbert · 11/06/2023 15:16

You don't have to wear black, nor buy something new. Why don't you wear something that you know your mum liked you in? That's what I did for my mother's funeral (and my father's for that matter).