Self acceptance: What have you had to learn to accept about yourself and how have you managed to do it (fashion and beauty wise)?

[Downsizeddumpling]

I have had to accept that I have a stomach that is never going to be flat and that I need to accept (working on this ever day) or disguise (not really working on this although open to tips and tricks).

Same as you OP, I've had 2 csections, without surgery it is physically always going to overhang. At the moment I'm hiding it with baggy summer dresses!

Also the fact I now have to wear glasses full time. Since I was 14 I wore contact lenses and felt confident, in the past 5 years or so my eyes just cannot tolerate them anymore. I've tried different types and all the same, so painful. Unfortunately I'm not suitable for laser eye surgery otherwise I would do it in a heartbeat.

That, no matter what I do, my hair is always going to be at least a bit frizzy.

By not giving a shit!!

At the grand old age of 41 I feel I’ve really turned a corner with not only “accepting” my body, but actually really liking it. I have the areas im not as keen on like everyone, my stomach isn’t great after having 4 dcs but - it’s ok, I have 4 lovely kids to show for it! Through this hot weather I’ve worn shorts every day despite having cellulite/varicose veins - and nobody stared or dropped dead from shock that I’m aware of. I am healthy and have working arms and legs and I feel so thankful for that.

The thing I’ve really learnt is: nobody cares, honestly! Wear what you like and be confident, life is short.

That I'm always going to have dark spots on my cheeks, most probably caused by sun damage/ageing. I've tried everything so now just accept I have to wear foundation to cover it up. 😩

That I'm never going to have smaller feet and every time I look down I'll wonder who parked their 2 barges under me trousers legs.

So many things...that I'm never going to be taller than 5 foot 1, that I'm a curvy 10/12 with a stomach and arse, that my legs are covered in spider veins, that my hair needs a lot of work to look half decent...I deal with it by dressing to cover the bits I don't like and accepting I'm never going to be Gal Gadot!

@mrshenny is it possible you are perimenopausal? I had to give up my loved contact lenses because my eyes became so dry, but I think being on HRT has resolved a lot of little issues I was having generally and I'm about to try again. I will probably go for the acuvue(sp?) dailies which allow in most oxygen to the eyeball.

That as much as I adore backless tops and dresses, my boobs need heavy scaffolding and it's just not gonna happen!

That my friend's new shoes on her size 4 feet will look fantastic and on my size 9's they will not

I found using the shampoo bars have stopped or at least controlled my frizz

I’ve seen women in Bardot tops which I loved as a teenager and in 20s and though I might try them my boobs aren’t the C/D cup they were!

Pleasantly surprised that I look ok in a new stretchy bodysuit from H&M though.

Today I received some Joules Walking Boots.
Beautiful leather with a little bit of crock styling.
Looked so nice and they do them in size 9..

Only the 9 is to small and too narrow. Back they go. :(

I think self-acceptance often comes with age.

I know I have chubby arms/rubbish hair/no waist, but over the years I have concluded that a) no-one is really noticing such things and b) who cares if they do? I've not been put on this earth to look physically perfect to everyone.

Obviously I've learned what styles suit me, and what to avoid (anything tight, for starters....things that skim rather than cling/belt) but I have far more body confidence than I did as a teen.

Funnily enough, the rubbish hair has actually become less rubbish now I'm starting to go grey. Grey hair seems to have a lot more body, and I adore the silver streaks. Every cloud.....

It’s definitely an age thing. I am 5ft 3, have G cup boobs and carry my weight on my tummy. And I have made peace with myself over the last 6 months or so and am starting to really enjoy choosing clothes that suit me instead of pining after things that I just can’t carry off. It’s only taken until my 54th birthday!

Mind you, I still have a total blind spot over jumpsuits. There must be one out there somewhere and I won’t rest untilI find it!

I have a massive potato nose. Not a distinguished beaky one like Barbra Streisand. More piggish!

I have learnt to accept it because I don't believe in cosmetic surgery. I also dont want DD- who has a similar nose, to think she needs to do it.

I had to learn that what existed in my mind was very different to what I actually feel good and look good in.

I never feel that i quite know what suits me though. It's tricky. I spent years in a world full of skinny jeans, where almost everything was tight fitting and uncomfortable, and even though im on the thin side i hated how these clothes felt on my body.
Now the looser trend is here, I look swamped by things. I can't win.

So i learned to simplify. Like paring everything back to absolute basics and i do well there. I have a short waist and so high waisted clothes look wrong on me, so i stick to a few things that i trust and dont get swept away by trends.

I had to learn that we have too much choice when shopping, and this made me more confused and distracted. A trillion page scroll on ASOS is not my cup of tea! I stick to three companies now and rarely go elsewhere. It has saved me a ton of money and my head isnt easily turned with flashy new things.

As for my looks, I had to accept that I have very porous fuzzy hair. It is healthy and i take care of it but it always looks decidedly off trend, unless I go to the orchestra or an art fair
I longed for Pam Morrison style straight hair when young and did everything in my power to change it. Now I just go with the flow, I will never have heavy straight hair that i can just wash and go. It will always be fluffy, defy gravity and look a bit awkward, and i got tired of feeling crap about it.

That I have permanent dark circles around my eyes that are never going away.

Then a couple of years ago, I learned that young people doing make-up on the TikTok and the Instagram were deliberately giving themselves dark eye circles.

So it turned out I didn't have to "accept" my dark circles at all. I could flaunt them with gay abandon.

Sucks to hy-a-lu-ron-ic acid.
I will never again have a waist measurement that matches my age. (I hope)
My hair dresser has clients spending a fortune to get hair like mine.

That I'm always going to look bigger than I am in photos. I'm a size 10, work out 6 days a week, run huge distances for fun and yet look like a house-end in photos. No idea why, I just do...and accept it I must.

Accepted I'll never have a flat stomach

Nothing, but nothing, will ever make my boobs grow beyond an A: actually, easier to dress this figure.
Not being photogenic: hey, it's better than the reverse.

That my hair is thin and you can see my scalp easily 😏

That without an enormous amount of hard dieting, I will never be a size 10 again. The fact is, I enjoy cooking and eating, I’m 56 and life is too sodding short to be miserable.
On the plus side, I’m virtually wrinkle free, have good hair and I’m healthy 😁

That my hair is super thick and coarse and only looks good in a pixie cut.
That I'm quite fat but that's okay.

My hair will always, always turn into a fright-wig in damp. I will never possess brows and lashes that don't need significant help. So far everything else is ok so I concentrate on that!