Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

At what age should you go grey gracefully?

151 replies

Saker · 21/05/2023 20:26

I'm 53 and started going grey in my 20s. I would be pretty much entirely grey now but get my hair coloured regularly. Last week at the hairdresser, she was hinting I should be thinking about starting to lighten the colour with the aim of letting my grey grow out over the next few years. When I was younger I would have thought that 53 was definitely old enough to be grey! However now I'm that age it seems a bit young. What do other people think?

OP posts:
TheYearOfSmallThings · 21/05/2023 20:56

I would start to go lighter and let it evolve at the speed you are comfortable with. A lighter colour means roots are less obvious and you can go longer between colours.

Personally I plan to go grey about 65. I might do it earlier if I had a warm skin tone and dark eyes, but for me it will be massively ageing.

sydsmum · 21/05/2023 20:59

Having dyed my hair since my teens I decided at 54 I really, really can't be bothered anymore. My hair has never been great, but I've had far more complements since the grey has grown in.

lauraisa · 21/05/2023 21:00

I'll let myself go grey when I become a grandmother.

qazxc · 21/05/2023 21:01

If you don't feel ready, don't do it. It's your hair, your choice.
Personally I am 45 with dark brown hair and going grey naturally ( never died my hair after my teens and cannot be arsed). So right now is a bit of a streaky stage.

Hedjwitch · 21/05/2023 21:02

Started going grey in my 20s. Am now nearly 60 and its dyed a deep burgundy/ purple. Loads of people compliment me on it. Two younger sisters have embraced the grey and look older than I do. I'm not planning on stopping anytime soon.

pizzaHeart · 21/05/2023 21:03

I think it’s entirely up to you. It depends on your style and colouring. I wouldn’t want to go grey at this age and tbh I wouldn’t like to be grey at all. It wouldn’t suit me colour wise.

PuppyMonkey · 21/05/2023 21:04

I’m 56 now. I was totally dark brown until a few years ago and purposely grew it out so I’m totally grey. I like it how it is now on the whole . I very much think you should do whatever you want with your own hair though.

For me, I didn’t like the thought of continuing with dyed brown/black hair into my late 50s/early 60s. I’ve seen other people doing this and it looked odd in a Paul McCartney way. Grin

Maybe if I’d been blonde I wouldn’t have had the issue? But I don’t think a block of dark hair looks particularly flattering on an older face.

Ladysaurus · 21/05/2023 21:07

I gave up at 32. I have a bit of gray peppered all through and some more significant patches coming out of my temples. It probably ages me but I just don't care.

SeaPink · 21/05/2023 21:08

I've got grey in front of my ears and also above the centre of my forehead. I'm 52 and I use semi permanent dye to match it with the rest of my brown hair. Once much more of it is grey I'll probably dye it a lighter color. Not sure yet when I'll let it go fully grey

Kissedbyfire1 · 21/05/2023 21:10

My natural colour was very dark brown with reddish/ chestnut tone. I gradually went blonde over years (from mid forties) as the grey set in. I hated seeing grey roots so was getting it touched up every month, which was more money and more time than I wanted to spend.
Lockdown was the excuse I needed- haven’t had it coloured since February 2020, and only had it trimmed once or twice. I now have a mane of grey hair! It’s totally white on the top but still very “steely” or “gunmetal” underneath.
Condition is much better. I get LOADS of compliments about it. I’m 60.

bellac11 · 21/05/2023 21:11

I'll be sticking to blonde, only grey round the sides at the moment but I notice on women with dark/brown hair who dye it dark, when the grey regrowth comes through, it makes it look like they've got bald patches because its so light.

So by having blond hair (my own hair is mousey), when it grows through it just blends into the whitey/blondy bits.

I wont want grey though, looks terrible on me

Motorina · 21/05/2023 21:14

I'm late 40s and naturally brown. I sort of assumed that grey was a thing that happened much older - somewhere around pension age, maybe? This thread is suggesting I'm wrong on that. Am I unusual in not needing to dye it?

Vicliz24 · 21/05/2023 21:15

I was 49 all my life I'd had almost black hair . For me it was when the white hairs started showing at my parting within days of colouring. I'd got to the point where every Saturday I was using an artist's paintbrush to cover up the silver around my forehead. I let it grow out for 5 months then had it chopped to the grey . So I went from long to a short pixie and from almost black to virtually white at the front overnight. Most people I knew including my DCs were against the idea until I was fully grey . Then suddenly everyone loved it . It's 9 years next month since I chopped it off . It's now long again and I love it .

WobblyLondoner · 21/05/2023 21:17

I started going grey in my 20s and dyed my hair from then until I was in my early 50s. Towards the end I struggled to find a colour that worked with my skin and I got more and more concerned about the chemicals involved (and let's face it, the cost). The growing out was a pain as I've a shoulder length bob but I have no regrets at all - I like my grey.

I do think people assume you're older if you are grey but I also think I look better now than I did - my hair is the right colour for my complexion.

CrunchyCarrot · 21/05/2023 21:18

I'd be happy to go grey at whatever age that happened. Only it hasn't and I'm 67 still with my natural dark blonde hair!

I think whenever you are comfortable with it, OP. If you're not ready yet, then there's no law to say you must go grey.

pennypingletonpenny · 21/05/2023 21:19

ElinoristhenewEnid · 21/05/2023 20:46

Still waiting for the grey hairs at age 63!!

My mum is now into her seventies and still only has a handful of grey hairs!

She says the only downside is everyone just assumes she dyes it anyway 😆

Libre2 · 21/05/2023 21:19

CharlotteStreetW1 · 21/05/2023 20:43

At what age should you go grey gracefully?

When you develop an allergy to hair dye 😂

36 in my case.

Oh my word - this is me! I was 37. Seemed to be after I had children. Anyway am now 50 and very salt and pepper- someone said only the other night what a great colour it was, which was a lovely confidence boost!

CrunchyCarrot · 21/05/2023 21:20

pennypingletonpenny · 21/05/2023 21:19

My mum is now into her seventies and still only has a handful of grey hairs!

She says the only downside is everyone just assumes she dyes it anyway 😆

Show quote history

Yes that's what I'm wondering now, do people think I dye my hair? I never have!

Deadringer · 21/05/2023 21:20

I don't think there is any age to go grey really, just as I don't think older women need to avoid long hairstyles. I am late 50s and getting sick of having my hair coloured, but I still have a lot of my own colour in my hair, if it was silver/white I would definitely go for it. My older sister is pure white and it's beautiful, but she is tall and slim and elegant while I am short and fat and dumpy, so I don't think I will rock it the way she does when my time comes.

CrystalCoco · 21/05/2023 21:21

If it 'feels a bit young' for you then it doesn't sound like you're ready, there's no hard and fast rule. If your hairdresser hadn't mentioned it, would you have been thinking about it yourself?

If she mentions it again you can tell her that you're not quite at that stage yet.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 21/05/2023 21:22

I have one auntie who had bright red hair because she decided to grow old "disgracefully" and others who've embraced the grey since it appeared.

I plan on embracing it.

LodgeLiving · 21/05/2023 21:31

I'll be 39 this year and naturally very dark haired. I started getting greys in my 20s but they became really obvious in my early/mid-30s. I thought I'd go lighter to try and incorporate them so I got balayage which looked very skunk like. I then tried a full head of highlights.... it drained the life out if me. Didn't suit my skin tone at all, it aged me massively! I've just gone back to dark again and look so much younger and healthier. I'd love to just let my hair go grey but it's not subtle (full cruella streak at the front and just started on my parting) so I'm going to continue dying it for the time being.

IMO, when it comes to your appearance, do what makes you happy. Don't bother about what anyone else thinks, it doesn't effect them.

ICMB · 21/05/2023 21:32

Technically never, my grandma still dyes her hair and she’s almost 70. It’s more about the colour, it has to REALLY suit you otherwise can look off.

KitchenSinkLlama · 21/05/2023 21:33

Why does age matter ?

hattie43 · 21/05/2023 21:33

Never grey hair is just so aging .