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Original poster

'She looks a state'

51 replies

User1706 · 15/04/2023 19:17

I need some help the above comment was what I heard a group of preteen boys saying about me whilst bursting into giggles about my hair when i took my toddler to the park today (my hair was clean but just plonked in a messy bun for reference.)

I know they're just kids, but it hit a nerve as that's how I feel right now. I don't get much sleep, so I have bad eye bags, my skin has gone dry/sensitive but still with bits of redness and the odd spot. I don't have ages to do make up and facials right now, but can anyone recommend a few simple products to brighten me up.

OP posts:
mac1974 · 15/04/2023 19:24

Oh that's mean. Kids can be harsh can't they. Please don't take it personally.
I've felt my skin has been quite tired recently & my friend recommended these 2 products to me. I do believe they are making a different. The face cream is amazing

'She looks a state'
'She looks a state'
mac1974 · 15/04/2023 19:25

I just use the retinol twice a week

CindersAgain · 15/04/2023 19:26

I would I think it’s just that they don’t understand that a messy bun is meant to be messy.

mac1974 · 15/04/2023 19:27

For foundation I like the Estée Lauder future hydrate.

I know you said you aren't getting much sleep but try to keep hydrated that will really help your skin too.

PussBilledDuckyPlait · 15/04/2023 19:30

They'd probably have said it even if you'd been looking model-perfect. They just want to get a reaction. Sadly, misogyny starts young in some people.

Don't feel you have to fork out for expensive products to 'fix' yourself on the strength of meaningless words from idiotic kids.

Kanaloa · 15/04/2023 19:31

PussBilledDuckyPlait · 15/04/2023 19:30

They'd probably have said it even if you'd been looking model-perfect. They just want to get a reaction. Sadly, misogyny starts young in some people.

Don't feel you have to fork out for expensive products to 'fix' yourself on the strength of meaningless words from idiotic kids.

Exactly this. You could have been Scarlet Johansson walking through that park and they’d have said something. Horrible little twits, I wonder what their parents would think?

letsallmeetupinthehyear2000 · 15/04/2023 19:34

The fact that they commented on you just says more about them. Seriously try not to take it seriously - young boys can be extremely toxic towards girls - it’s nothing new sadly

Runningonempty01 · 15/04/2023 19:35

At that age they are probably just daring each other to say something horrid to each woman who passes by. They probably think they are hilarious. I bet your hair looks great, I love a messy bun.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 15/04/2023 19:35

Please don't give a moment's thought to what some random teenage boys say about you. They are showing off for each other by being obnoxious to adults, and you were a safe target as a woman alone with a toddler, which makes them massive losers. I highly doubt they were looking particularly groomed or radiant themselves.

BKingso · 15/04/2023 19:35

PP already said what I came along to say. The only thing I would take from this is reflecting on the revolting misogyny that makes a bunch of teen boys think they can make fun of an adults woman's appearance/ anything about a woman like they are judge and jury because they are males.

Just let it fuel your resolve to bring up your own kids not to be like that or accept that!

TheYearOfSmallThings · 15/04/2023 19:38

Just let it fuel your resolve to bring up your own kids not to be like that or accept that!

God yes, if you take anything away from the experience let it be this.

WoodenStackingRainbow · 15/04/2023 20:00

Had this last summer from some teenage lads. Heard one of them say something along the lines of "how about her then" and the boy replied "naa that's fucking awful mate". I'd gone out for a lovely sunny evening walk to chill out after work and came home in tears. Hugs. It's horrible x

BevMarsh · 15/04/2023 20:08

Very likely one of the boys was looking for a conversation filler as you walked past so tried to think of something he thought witty or cool that would get a laugh out of the lads.
The teenage boys I know aren't great conversationalists and tend to make random silly comments.

BevMarsh · 15/04/2023 20:08

Especially preteens

Exaspa · 15/04/2023 20:14

My entire adolescence was spent around little shits like this, low level casual misogyny definitely starts early in some places. I have seen photos of what some of them grew up into though and let's just say they have mostly not aged well...

Justalittlebitduckling · 15/04/2023 20:14

PussBilledDuckyPlait · 15/04/2023 19:30

They'd probably have said it even if you'd been looking model-perfect. They just want to get a reaction. Sadly, misogyny starts young in some people.

Don't feel you have to fork out for expensive products to 'fix' yourself on the strength of meaningless words from idiotic kids.

Yeah, they’re probably just repeating what they’ve heard adults say to sound grown up.

BonnieEye · 15/04/2023 20:18

TheYearOfSmallThings · 15/04/2023 19:35

Please don't give a moment's thought to what some random teenage boys say about you. They are showing off for each other by being obnoxious to adults, and you were a safe target as a woman alone with a toddler, which makes them massive losers. I highly doubt they were looking particularly groomed or radiant themselves.

This

BKingso · 15/04/2023 20:18

I once got called a MILF by some 6th formers on the corridor in school. I was a teacher. I was about 8 years older than them at the time. Interestingly though I didn't think to tell them off or report the comment. I hope young women teachers would, nowadays (this was about 15yrs ago)

AllOfThemWitches · 15/04/2023 20:30

They probably didn't even think it and were just being little shits to make each other laugh. Don't take it personally.

Comedycook · 15/04/2023 20:33

Runningonempty01 · 15/04/2023 19:35

At that age they are probably just daring each other to say something horrid to each woman who passes by. They probably think they are hilarious. I bet your hair looks great, I love a messy bun.

They were definitely doing this, nothing to do with how you actually look. It's a dare. Pre teen boys do not notice a random mums appearance

MissingMoominMamma · 15/04/2023 20:35

Are you sure they were talking about you?

SpreadableCheeseOnEverything · 15/04/2023 20:43

I'd have asked them who the fuck they thought they were talking about!! Sorry, not helpful but I feel so angry about it on your behalf, OP!

I bet you look fabulous! Take no notice of them!

Atethehalloweenchocs · 15/04/2023 20:46

We are talking about a group who are used to ultra made up filtered pictures from influencers. If you are not a supermodel ready for the catwalk, they are going to be judgy.

Dymaxion · 15/04/2023 21:03

Never take any notice of anyone who isn't washing their own pants @User1706

StraightHairDonCare · 15/04/2023 21:06

If you can afford it, sort the hair out and go to a private dermatologist.

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